The door unlocks with a click. Lonely shadows greet them and Ha Yoon removes his shoes by the door. Has the apartment always been this cold?
“Sorry, there isn’t much.”
Ki Tae glances around but doesn’t comment on the bare furnishing and half-unpacked boxes.
“Just sit anywhere,” Ha Yoon gestures to the living area, an awkward smile on his face. “I think… Dae Won isn’t home yet. He must be working overtime. Must be busy, he usually lets me know beforehand.”
While Ki Tae makes himself comfortable on the couch, Ha Yoon walks to the kitchen, noticing his empty tea cup still sitting on the table. He grabs two glasses from the kitchen cabinet. “Tea? Juice?”
“Water is fine.”
“You’re a professional bartender, I guess my drinks are not up to par.” Ha Yoon chuckles. Why is there tension in the air? He strides back to the living area and puts the glasses on the coffee table. “Do you want to watch something while we wait?”
Ki Tae glances at the bookshelf. “Can I look through the photo albums?”
“Of course! Not a reunion without going down memory lane!” Ha Yoon beams and rushes to grab several albums. He scatters them across the table and squeezes himself next to Ki Tae, excited to once again look back at their younger years. “Ah, remember this arcade? It’s being renovated now, but when it’s done, we should all go there again just for old time’s sake. We’re probably pretty rusty but who cares! And this. The riverbank! We gotta go there again!”
The photos reflect an accurate picture of their childhood and teenage years. Good times, bad times. In a lot of it, Ha Yoon and Dae Won steal the show while Ki Tae is usually spotted somewhere in the background. But even so, he’s always there. Always part of the group. Always looking at Ha Yoon.
“Is this how you wanted to prove?” Ha Yoon’s voice falters, “That you’ve liked me from way back then?”
“No,” Ki Tae flips to the last page of the album. The last set of photos.
Their high school graduation. The three of them stand in front of the school gates. Dae Won has the brightest smile out of all of them. His arms are wrapped around both Ha Yoon and Ki Tae by his sides, ready to leave his life bound by school rules. While Ki Tae has an indifferent look, Ha Yoon recognises the fake smile he forced in the picture. A smile to hide his broken heart. A smile to steel himself whenever Dae Won talks about his girlfriend.
The photos end.
Ki Tae closes the album.
Ha Yoon glances over with a questioning look.
“So, tell me, Ha Yoon.” Ki Tae returns the gaze. “What do you think happened to your feelings for him then?”
“Why are you asking that? Of course I still like him. Even now…” Ha Yoon’s voice trails off.
“And do you remember what you did after graduation?” Ki Tae leans in, “What we did?”
Ha Yoon stops to ponder, “Ah, we went on a… hiking trip.”
“That’s right.” Ki Tae says, “That was our last trip. Together.”
Ha Yoon studies Ki Tae’s somber expression. The venomous snake returns inside him, churning, hissing, reminding him not to probe any further because undoubtedly, it will– “What do you mean?”
Ki Tae gently cups Ha Yoon’s face in his hand, caressing him with such gentleness and love. “Ha Yoon, I said it before. I’ve always loved you. I would do anything for you. You wanted to love and be loved. You were crying all night. You were hurt. I couldn’t just sit by and let you burn out. He was the reason for your tears, your pain.”
The shadows keep a close eye on them. Time stops. In a quiet world, only the two of them exist. Ha Yoon can’t look away from Ki Tae despite his entire body screaming for him to run. His stomach turns, his heart clenches. His mind begs him to stop but his eyes are locked with Ki Tae’s. Cold sweat on the back of his neck. Short breaths. Every inch of his skin tingling.
“I suggested we go on a trip, deep into the mountains where no one would usually travel to. You agreed, knowing what I meant. You said yes. You told me that it’s perfect. You said that it’ll be the best outcome.”
“No…” Ha Yoon hears himself whisper.
“You finally smiled after the nights of crying. You thanked me. No matter what, I was going to help you, to protect your smile. I was prepared for the worst.”
“No, don’t–” Ha Yoon stutters. He wants to run but his body is frozen in place.
“But I couldn’t do it.” Ki Tae finds Ha Yoon’s hands.
“You’re lying,” Ha Yoon’s voice cracks as a sob threatens to escape. “You’re lying. He’s just… he’s just late. He’ll be here any minute!”
“Ha Yoon,” Ki Tae squeezes his hands. “He’s not here anymore.”
“No–”
"You killed him." Ki Tae says. "You killed him."
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