Five years ago, nearing the end of their high school years, Dae Won said, “I've got my future plans ready.” The three of them were lazing around in their usual spot behind the school, away from the other students. It was third period. The bell had rung ten minutes ago but none of them made any indication of moving.

“Hah?” Ha Yoon gulped the rest of his orange juice, “What prompted that?”

“My girlfriend,” Dae Won grinned as he sat up.

Ha Yoon stiffened at the word.

“I’ll become a proper adult, get a boring job, and we’ll move into an apartment together.” Dae Won listed them off one by one on his fingers. “I ain’t perfect, but that’s the least I can do for her.”

“Of course you aren’t perfect,” Ki Tae spoke up from under the tree, his silent earphones covering his silver-ladened ears. “You’re as much of an asshole as us. Gang fights, illegal driving, alcohol, and so much more. How could anyone be so blind to that?”

“Yo, some people do love me regardless of what I did. But what matters is I’m willing to learn and change. With her, I feel like I can do anything, even turn the world upside down.” Dae Won laughed, “Maybe you’ll understand it when you fall in love.”

“Oh, I do…” Ki Tae murmured in a voice too low for anyone to hear.

The rest of the day rolled by with Ha Yoon in a daze. He didn’t remember returning to class or walking home but when he regained a bit of himself, he was in his dark room alone. 

“My girlfriend.”

The single word stabbed Ha Yoon and broke his world apart. Who was this girl who swept Dae Won off from right under Ha Yoon’s feet? No name, no face. Someone he knew nothing about. Someone who destroyed all his years of crushing and gave him not even a chance to confess his feelings to Dae Won.

A knock.

The door opened. Ki Tae invited himself in. He spared a glance at Ha Yoon and joined him on the bed.

Without a word, Ha Yoon leaned his head on Ki Tae’s shoulder.

“How stupid.” Ha Yoon was surprised that his voice was calm. “If only I had more courage to say it to his face. Now he’s gone off with some girl for a normal life. A better life. And here I am, wallowing in self-pity at what I didn’t do. Forget being a delinquent. I’m just a coward.”

Ki Tae rested his head atop Ha Yoon’s. “You’re the bravest person I know, Ha Yoon. Going against all societal norms and standing proud as yourself. And even though you’re hurting from his ignorant choices, you’re still here with us.” Ki Tae paused, then in a bitter tone, said, “That just shows how much you love him.”

Ha Yoon chuckled at the statement. “I’m just a fool in love. I would do anything to keep him with me, with us. So that he doesn’t become a boring adult, so that he’s here forever. But he’s going to follow that girl. Who is she? Where did she come from? How… how did she steal Dae Won from me?”

Ha Yoon’s voice faltered. He hugged his knees, curling into himself to stop the sobs threatening to rack his body.

“And why does he go with her when we’re here? When I’m here?” Ha Yoon choked.

Ki Tae wrapped his arms around Ha Yoon and placed a gentle kiss on his forehead.

“When I’ve been loving him all these years. If I didn’t hesitate so much, if I wasn’t so insecure about my gender… Is it that? Is it because I told him I’m a man? So he ran off with a girl? Would we have been together if I had just confessed as a girl?”

Ha Yoon grabbed Ki Tae by the collar to face him. While his eyes were shaking with the flood of anxiety, Ki Tae’s dark eyes remained steady and calm.

“How can I keep him for myself?”

“You know I love you, right?” Ki Tae suddenly said.

Ha Yoon paused. He released his grip. “Yeah… sorry for dumping this on you.”

“No, keep clinging onto me.” Ki Tae grabbed Ha Yoon’s hands. “We’ve kissed, we’ve fucked. I’m aware you like Dae Won but that won’t stop me from loving you. And I can’t stand seeing you hurt everyday. If Dae Won is the problem, I’ll help you fix it so you’ll never cry again.”

Ha Yoon stared wide eyed at Ki Tae’s declaration. Despite his years of stubborn pining for Dae Won, he clearly felt and understood Ki Tae’s genuine feelings. Oh, how he wished he could return them.

“He’s ignorant, he runs off to some girl, he hurts you in every imaginable way. What an idiot, for not seeing what a precious person you are.” Ki Tae leaned in and pressed their lips together. A soft, gentle kiss that easily left Ha Yoon breathless. “Even if he leaves, you will always be hurt by the fact that he chose someone else. So for you, my dear, I’ll make sure he can’t go anywhere.”

“How?” Ha Yoon whispered. His heart thumped, his ears whistled. His body grew hot at how close they were and his hands unconsciously moved to bring them closer together.

Ki Tae tilted his head to return the deep kiss, sharing the heat with Ha Yoon.

“I’ll kill him.”