Caster = a type of class that doesn’t do physical attacks but instead relies on magical spells. A healer is a caster, generally, though they rely on healing, not damage attacks. But mages and bards are two types of caster DPS classes, they do magical attacks from a distance. Out of all the DPS classes, I suck least at playing a mage.

It’s hot. It’s way hotter than I expected it to be today and I’m glad I took a strappy top with me instead of just my t-shirt. I lean over the table, my head on my arms, it’s too sticky to sit like this, but also too hot to keep sitting up, even in the shadows.

“Troy...” I don’t even lift my head. “Get me something to drink, will you?”

“Why should I?” He puts his sweaty and hot hand on my bare skin on my back and I groan.

“Too hot.”

“Well, yes, it’s summer.” I can almost hear the evil grin he’s making at me. “Summer means hot.”

“Summer is evil.” I sit up, glaring at Troy. “Go get me something to drink. I’m your guild leader.”

“Ah-hah.” He raises his eyebrows as he pulls a face. “And I’ve known you since you were small enough to eat sand pies and were considering adding spiders to your diet.”

“Ugh.” I sigh. I don’t want to get up, it’s too hot to move. I’m hoping that it will be cooler when we go home in the evening.

“Hey, did you hear from Fleur this morning?”

I shake my head. “She had to work and didn’t know if she could get out early. And it sounded like she didn’t know if her mom would let her come anyway...” Which sucked. I really want to meet her, we’ve been spending so much time online that I really want to see her. But I get it. Meeting people from online is just not something that you’d normally do... Especially as a teen girl... Which I know, the only reason my parents allow me to come to gatherings like this is because Troy is with me. I don’t know why, but somehow they trust him to protect me or something...

“Bummer. I know you really want to see her.”

“Troy...” I glare at him. “Don’t go there. I just have a lot of respect for her as a fellow female gamer and she’s a great healer.”

“Hmmm, hmmm. Keep telling yourself that. Keep telling yourself it’s about respect and not something more primal.” He grins and I kick at his leg. Which is way too much moving in this heat.

“Shut up.” I groan and drop my head onto my arms again. It’s too hot to argue with him today.

Troy’s finally quiet for a while, but then I feel him move next to me, sit up straighter. “Eh, Alex?”

“What?” I’m not lifting my head up for some stupid question.

“I think she’s here.” Something in his voice tells me that he’s not joking, unlike the ten times he’s tried this same move this afternoon.

My heart starts beating like crazy and I look up. Okay, so may be I’m a bit more excited than I’d like to admit…

At the door there’s a girl in a brightly coloured summer dress, her hand on her big sun hat as she lifts the front to look over the group. I can only stare at her. She’s like a vision. She wasn’t joking when she said that she loved flowers, her dress is covered in them and I can even see some flowers in her hat, which I think may even be real. I don’t know, it would fit her to do that. She really is so much like her character, maybe not in actual looks, but definitely in the aura she gives off. I see her take a deep breath, nodding to herself, and walk over to Aaron, who’s standing on his own at a table with drinks.

They chat for a moment and then Aaron looks our way, pointing at us. I’m not sure if I’m breathing anymore right now.

Fleur smiles and then comes over to us, but as she comes closer I see she has her eyes on Troy and my heart sinks. Fleur eyes me for a moment but then flashes a brilliant smile at Troy. “Hi, you’re Alex, right? I’m Fleur.”

Troy lets out a little laugh, it’s not the first time people expect him to be Alex, especially when it’s just the two of us together. I have to admit, he does look like he could be a tank called AlexTheDestroyer, and sure, I guess he looks good. But to hear the girl I’ve been talking to, the girl who has been on my mind for weeks now mix us up... it hurts, it stomach-pain-inducing hurts. Troy clears his throat. “Actually, I’m Troy. This is Alex.” He wraps his hot and sticky arm around my shoulder and I shrug him off as quickly as I can. Too hot and not good.

“Oh.” Fleur’s face falls and then she puts on an awkward smile. “Hi.”

“Hey.” My voice is rough. “Nice to meet you.” The happy feeling inside when I first saw her is gone now. She didn’t expect a girl, she expected a guy like Troy. A guy who’s built like a wall like AlexTheDestroyer, not a plain frail girl like me.

“Sit down. Sit down.” Troy motions at Fleur, his voice forced upbeat, then he stands up. “I’ll go get you two something to drink. What do you want?”

“Water.” I can’t help but grumble a little. There’s a beautiful and smart girl sitting right across from me and all she wants is a guy like Troy. Fuck. My. Life.

“Me too, thanks.” Fleur’s voice is careful before she meets my eyes. I can see her confusion, and her disappointment.

“I’ll be right back.” Troy walks off and when he’s out of hearing-range I speak up.

“I’m not what you expected.” I wish it didn’t hurt as much as it does.

Fleur shakes her head and takes her hat off, playing with the rim in her hands, her hair falls forward a little, hiding her face. “No.” Her voice is soft, quiet, between all the rowdy voices around us.

“I’m sorry. You thought I was going to be a guy. Like Troy, or Aaron.” I feel my throat close up, making it hard to breathe. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to deceive you.” I stand up. If I stay here any longer I’m going to cry. I don’t want to cry in front of Fleur. It was all just in my head. Everything that happened was just in my head and I can’t just force my feelings onto her because I had the wrong idea. I’m a girl, I fall in love with girls, but other girls usually don’t also fall in love with me. I’m used to it, but it still hurts.

I make my way to the back, to one of the snack tables, looking at everything but not seeing it.

“Oh, Alex.” Cerise comes over, wrapping an arm around my waist as she pulls me against her side.

I quickly cover my mouth with my hand as I take a shuddering breath, big fat tears slide down my cheeks. “I don’t want to cry. I’m not supposed to cry.”

“I don’t care about supposed to or not. You like her and it seemed like she just turned you down. Pretty sure crying is a normal response.” She leans in a little, her closeness comforting, her voice soothing. “I know it’s no use to you right now. But, you’re amazing and you have amazing strength in you. You know I’d date you if I was into girls, right?” Her voice is soft and makes me laugh a little, even though the tears don’t seem to be drying up just yet.

“I know. I’d totally be into you if you weren’t a DPSer.” I laugh, but it’s raw, not a happy sound. Cerise is great, but no matter what, I don’t feel for her what I feel for Fleur. It just didn’t happen, just like it didn’t happen with Aaron or Owen or any of the others I met in the Destruction of Elysium. It’s just been Fleur. Fleur’s the first girl I met online who I fell for immediately. But she expected a guy, not me.

“Hey.” Cerise plays pretend-offended. “I can’t help being a crappy tank or healer.”

“I can’t help being born a girl.” I smile at her tone, at the look in her eyes. Cerise always knows how to make me smile.

“Exactly.” Cerise steps around me, leaning in front of me, looking at my face with soft eyes. “And you’re an amazing girl. Don’t ever forget that.” Cerise reaches out, wiping at my cheeks. “And you’ll find someone who will realise that and fall in love with you. Don’t give up.” She smiles, then her eyes flit to a point behind me before she quickly grabs something from the table. “And I’m out.”

I’m about to ask her why, when there is a voice behind me.

“Alex?” Fleur’s voice is anxious and I quickly wipe at my face before I turn to her, trying to wipe the last tears away.

“Yeah?” Looking at her just hurts again. She’s beautiful, she’s exactly as I expected her to be, and just seeing her now hurts.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I didn’t expect…” She raises her hands a little, before dropping them, her eyes averted.

“You didn’t expect a girl?”

Fleur shakes her head. “Which is stupid, because why wouldn’t I? We never exchanged other information apart from our names and you know, age and stuff. And really, Alex is just as good a girl’s name as a boy’s name.” She lets out an awkward laugh. “I just... I had this idea about who you were and that didn’t fit the reality. That’s not your fault. That’s my fault. And I’m sorry for that.” She takes a breath, facing me. “You didn’t deceive me, I deceived myself. I’m so sorry for hurting you.” She frowns and bites her lip, running the edge of her hat through her hands. A nervous tic that’s becoming more obvious.

She really does look like she’s sorry and I get it. The stupid thing is just that this happens to me way more often than I’d like… and this is not the first time a girl I like likes my personality, or my humour, or anything else, but can’t get over my being a girl. “Thanks. I’m sorry for over-reacting.”

She shakes her head, her hair bouncing around her face. “You weren’t at fault. I acted like an ass, so of course I hurt you. That’s on me, not you.” She takes a deep breath, like I saw her do before, standing up straight, holding out her hand, a real smile around her lips this time. “Let’s try this again. Hi. I’m Fleur, I play a healer and I sometimes do stupid things that hurt people, even when I don’t mean to.”

I take her hand. “Hey. I’m Alex, I play a tank and I...” I don’t even know what to say right now. The only things I can come up with feel silly. “And I sometimes play videogames all night with a girl I just met online, sometimes so much that I get her in trouble.” I smile and Fleur laughs. I hold my breath for a moment, she’s so beautiful when she laughs. Fuck me, this is not going to be easy.

“As long as that girl is just me.” Fleur smiles.

“Yes. Just you.” I nod, butterflies in my stomach seem to have resorted to playing high-speed-jet instead of fluttering. Maybe not all is lost? Maybe we can be friends?

Fleur’s cheeks colour a little at that, nodding slightly. Then she almost jumps a little. “Oh!” Fleur’s eyes sparkle instantly. “Did you hear about the new night quests? Like, they’ll only spawn during night time in-game. What did you think about that announcement? I thought it was genius, but I saw some people complain about it...” She looks at me like what I’m saying will really matter.

“I...” I’m taken a little off-guard by the sudden change in topic, gathering my thoughts. “I thought it was interesting. Though, I totally hope they come with special night gear or something. I hope this isn’t one of those experiments that they run and then totally forget about. Although...” I step closer. “I did hear that the next raid may be connected to the whole night-time thing too. Which could be interesting.”

Fleur nods, letting out a little gasp. “Definitely.” She smiles, then looks around. “I’m kind of hungry.” She pulls a face. “Just got back from work and wasn’t able to eat much today. Too excited.”

I laugh. “Well. Let’s get you something to eat and drink then. Follow me.” I walk to one of the tables where there is more food-food instead of just snacks. “What do you want?”

Fleur’s eyes keep sparkling as she looks at everything on the table. “Oh my god. Ribs!” She rushes for them and as I follow her, I quickly grab some paper napkins, stuffing them into my pocket. We’ll probably need those later. She turns to me, her eyes big. “You want some too? What flavour do you like?”

“Do they have something spicy?” I step next to her, I hadn’t actually checked the menu yet, too nervous, and it almost feels like we’re back to how we were before, how we act in-game.

“Eh.” She looks at the different plates. “Yes. Something with jalapenos.”

“Yes, please.” I grab a plate, but she pushes her hat into my hands and starts stacking multiple racks onto her plate, then she turns to me.

“Where do you want to sit?” She smiles broadly. She looks so cute.

“Eh.” I look around, finding the only table sort of in the shadows to be the table where I sat at before. “Let’s sit there. I see shadow there.”

“Oh. Definitely!” She starts walking and I grab two bottles of water from a table with drinks nearby before I follow her.

So, this means we’re sharing the plate. Right? I’m not misreading this situation? I’m not being stupid?

But I push the thoughts from my mind. This is food. This is sharing ribs. Well, that and finding out that Fleur apparently loves spicy food as much as I do. Which is definitely a good thing. If we’d date, that is. Or, you know, just hang out as friends…

Fuck.