She lay in the stained sheets, reminding herself why she was doing it, repeating what her family told her. They need the money. They need me.

Eventually, sleep came, and the darkness swallowed her whole and pushed her further into the floor. A cold chain wrapped around her neck, squeezing the air out of her. Her mouth opened, straining to scream and beg that her dreams not be tainted as well. 

She shrieked, sitting up. She looked from left to right, regaining her orientation and all that’s happened. Tears brim her eyes but never fall as she puts on a brave face.

A crash and fluttering startle Theodessa. She turned to the source. Her closet. She smiles and walks to the door. 

When she opens it, a flurry of black and rainbow flies out. Theodessa turns to the eastern rosella as she sits perched by her golden cage. 

“Good morning, Rainbow,” Theodessa said. 

She fills the bird’s food and water before picking out her clothes and changing into them. She looked over at Rainbow, sending a goodbye kiss before leaving for the second floor. 

In the bathroom, she pulled the scale from under the counter. She wasn’t surprised she hadn’t lost weight. Maybe it was wishful thinking compelling her to look. She ensured the number disappeared before kicking it back under the counter next to the trash can. 

She looked at herself in the mirror and almost had the first mental breakdown of the day. Her hooded eyes were red and swollen with deep purple bags. She washed away the tears that dried on her face, and hid the bags under her eyes with foundation. She hid the marks on her neck with a combination of green eyeshadow and concealer.

She left and went down the stairs. Richard was in his room, playing loud music. A plate awaited her at the table, but Theodessa wasn’t hungry. She grabbed her bag and her lunch and left for school. 

She took her late slip and went to class, where the teacher was disappointed at how late she was. Theodessa apologized profusely all the way to her seat. Denny, who sat behind, sent a wicked smirk, but Theodessa pretended not to see.

By Lunch, Theodessa was done with the day and wished for the earth to move faster around the sun. She sat alone at a table with a large bottle of water, writing notes in her music book. She half closed her eyes, allowing her to escape reality. Just until the bell rings, she said to herself. 

A hand slammed down in front of her, harshly bringing Theodessa back. She flinched dropping her pen. 

“Oops, sorry!” Carlet dropped, grabbed Theodessa’s pen, and jumped back. “I didn’t mean to startle you.” she sat down. “And for being late. I forgot where they had these.” she slides a paper to Theodessa. 

The competition forums. Theodessa felt sick staring at the all too familiar questions like she was watching her own death on repeat.