I woke up, still numb after yet another death. Once again, I found myself in that dark place where I always return upon perishing. The silhouettes of lights wandered across the horizons of an eternal, dark void, like stars reflecting "memories" slipping away from me.

Always this cursed place.

I think, I dive, I delve into the murky depths of my memories, which unravel before me over centuries, losing identity with each death. It's as if fate itself is playing a cruel game, an overwhelming sense of helplessness consuming me—a creature at the mercy of the tides of time, devoid of control over my life, or lives. Amid the fog of fragmented memories, I spiral into absolute frustration.

I feel as though I’ve never truly lived throughout all this time. Reflecting on each return to this place, I realize these lives are meaningless—just a slaughterhouse, corroding my sanity with each passing death.

A sensation of weightlessness covers my nonexistent body in this realm. My hands, feet, wings, or any limbs I might once have had are replaced by black liquid or rendered invisible.

Nothing here makes sense.

I sat on that oppressive abyss and screamed, “I want out, I can’t take it anymore! End this, please, let me die for good!” But only incomprehensible buzzing escaped my lips.

I tried lashing out, punching and shaking the shadowy ground.

“I don’t want to exist anymore! Cast me into nonexistence, you abhorrent universe! Enough agony!”

In vain;

No law, absolutely none, governs this post-life realm. This empty and infinite corridor could be someone’s dream—a whimsical place representing their subconscious state. Yet for me, it’s a hellish cycle, my nightmare with every awakening.

I looked up and behind me as an inaudible noise, a searing sensation, etched itself into the darkness that forms my being.

A faint dripping sound began, drawing my attention with its rapid tinkling. A fluid of golden light, defying mundane gravity by rising rather than falling, emerged from a pitch-dark blue ground, almost indistinguishable from black, and halted mid-air.

The liquid stood out starkly against the backdrop, injecting a kind of golden life into a previously dead, dark, and cold environment. These dead qualities were gently replaced by a luminous orb forming in front of me, growing as the drops merged into its radiant body, gaining substance and strength.

Though unprecedented, I felt skeptical about this first light bathing the desolate void.

The drops ceased, and what had been steadily expanding stopped growing. It reached its limit: the size of a bowling ball. Its form cast a weak but warm light over the surroundings.

“Child, listen to what I have to say,” a calm, serene feminine voice echoed across the space, filling my solitude with an unusual calmness—undoubtedly synthetic.

The orb, floating half a meter away, settled on the black liquid, reflecting its singularity and contrast.

I tried to utter a word, any phrase, but no sound came out. I wanted to speak, to make my voice heard—like a child craving attention—any response, anything to alleviate my agonizing loneliness and desolation.

“I haven’t allowed you to speak; I want you to listen,” the voice resounded again, not through my senses but directly into my mind. Then she continued, leaving me simultaneously calm and apprehensive: “You don’t remember how you got here, but I assure you, it was necessary. This is your punishment, my idea of justice,” she paused momentarily. “Each life, each soul, every being you reaped left a bitter scar on existence. You were a hero, beloved by all, an example among your kind. Yet you corrupted yourself with vengeance and hatred, abusing your power, your strength, everything I gave you, to bring harm. In your first life, before arriving here, you were born to create, guide, cherish, love, and save. But like many of your kind, you lost sight of those goals... And you, you did worse—you became a weapon of destruction and annihilation.

"I turned a blind eye to the killings and lost purposes of your kind towards the 'lesser' beings for a long time,” she continued, “but you… You slaughtered millions. I gave you a chance, the path of light. My children lifted you from the Eternal Void; I welcomed you with open arms so that your life could be more than this veil of ignorance, giving hope to those who had lost faith in me. But you were unworthy, succumbing to arrogance.”

I tried to speak; this time, my voice emerged faint and weak—not as words but as mutual, metaphysical understanding, pure comprehension.

I had no rebuttal; I couldn’t, it was impossible. I could only accept what this entity said as absolute truth. Deep down, I knew it was the unvarnished, raw truth.

“Forgive me, please, I… I was wrong…” I responded, trembling and broken, kneeling before the entity with utmost sincerity. Her benevolence was the only thing sparking a glimmer of hope within me.

The sphere shimmered like water forming ripples, maintaining its silence. Moments later, the ethereal orb began to sink into the black, lifeless river, its glow fading until absolute darkness returned.

My hopes started dissolving into profound despair. I tried to cry, to thrash about, to release anything still within me. Yet nothing emerged; I had no body to vent my feelings, so the growing void within me didn’t overflow, to my bitter dismay.

It seemed like this would continue, that I would return once again to the body of some random creature on a specific planet and persist in this torment of repetition.

A relief washed over me as I noticed something emerging where the sphere had disappeared—a sort of ground sprouting from the black liquid, slowly expanding as everything around me transformed: roots sprang from every direction, growing steadily, shaping themselves into black trees. Most remarkable was that clump of earth, now encased in glowing blue roots within the black sea.

Gradually, a trunk began to emerge, twisting and curling around itself before branching out into multiple limbs. From these grew leaves emitting a golden glow, giving the tree an aura of unparalleled beauty. Meanwhile, the tiny white specks, once scattered across the scenery like distant stars, faded, replaced by a yellow light now intensely illuminating a corridor amid a swamp of leafless trees.

Golden sparks started flickering around the tree, forming a golden ring around it. In an instant, the sparks condensed and shot toward me like a strong yet gentle wind, enveloping me in an aura of warmth and celestial light that deeply wounded me.

I threw myself into desperate agony at the sensation. It was as if a heat capable of purging me at any moment—timeless and infinitely powerful—could obliterate me effortlessly, without constraint.

Perhaps a threat? No, it seemed more like a test. A genuine fear of being destroyed by a light I couldn’t endure or understand blossomed as that glow encircled my darkness-formed body. The spark seemed sufficient to illuminate and erase my existence in this state, completely, without trace or remnant.

That voice, which had once left me, returned: “This has been enough; childishness, a transient state, fades in the face of death's imminence. Life is a riddle to be deciphered, propelling the search for meaning beyond mere existence. The time to break illusions and build an authentic future approaches, demanding courage and determination."

I couldn’t find words before the radiant cedar or the entity it represented.

The feminine voice said, “Speak, I want to hear your desires, though I already know them.”

With a flicker of hope trying to break through my rigid shell, I stood before the uncertainty and murmured, “I want rest, I want to die once and for all, to reach nirvana and cease to exist… Forgive me for everything.”

“Dear one, despite all, I forgive you; remember this above all. But many do not; many still hate you. I will reincarnate you one last time,” she paused briefly, and in that moment, I sensed all the space around us folding, bringing me closer to the tree—a manifestation of absolute power over time, space, and immaterial reality.

“Why must I continue? Why one more?” I asked.

The tree stood majestic, its form unwavering and undisturbed. She replied, “There is still much hatred, disdain, anguish, and despair hidden within your soul. Try to be different; try to change in this last chance. Besides, the choice is yours—decide whether to continue living or perish. It won’t be hard to die, but survival will be the greatest challenge of your journey. Free will is yours; end your life when you are reborn or live it to its fullest.”

With each word in mind, I asked, “How can I change? This incessant cycle has turned me into a cold shell, almost emotionless—a being drowning in trauma and scars. Even my memories don’t belong to me. I’m lost in a depressive labyrinth, unsure of how to start finding my way out.”

The glow emanating from the entity’s leaves intensified further as she replied, burning my soul: “You have forgotten the value of life; you no longer see its beauty. Yet you still fear death and, in the future, will fear leaving those you love behind.”

“How can I change? I no longer find any joy in life. Can the mere existence of an irrational creature truly make me feel alive again?” I questioned, confused by her statement.