And so a week passed in this new world. We had abandoned the idea of using magic with my bare hands. I'd got back some gauntlets so I could practise better. My trainings with Stella were daily and helped me improve. Of course, I was still a long way from her level or even that of a royal knight but I was learning step by step, slowly but surely. Fighting certainly wasn't for me but I put my heart and soul into meeting Stella's expectations. She wasn't discouraged and continued to teach me. 

Soon enough, royalty gathered to judge my level as a future hero. It would seem that with a little more training I could meet her standards. It was Stella who told me the news, a half-smile on her face. I have to admit that I didn't pay much attention to her at the time. I was too happy with my progress that I didn't notice anything. When I think about it, she didn't seem very excited despite her expression. I can't quite figure her out, maybe the knighthood will help me clear up that doubt.

It takes place tomorrow and will be a big step for me into the world of chivalry. However, my level still remains execrable but this event was merely a modality of being awarded the knight’s title. After that, if I've understood correctly, I'll continue to train within the castle to improve and perfect my level.

But what about me? Becoming a knight? I still find it hard to believe. What if, in the end, I don't manage to live up to their expectations? Except I've got no choice, I have to be up to it.

My doubts didn't ease my sleep, I continued to roll around in bed in the hope of dissipating my anxiety. Faint knocks echoed against my bedroom door. The noise slightly startled me, more of confusion than fear. I got up slowly, who could be knocking at this hour? I rubbed my eyes painfully, still in the dark, and grabbed the handle with my other hand. On the other side was a slightly lost princess.

— “Princess? What are you doing here?”

There stood Casthy Rosade, a shawl covering her shoulders to protect her from the cool evening air. Her frail figure waited outside my bedroom door, she fled my gaze. 

— “A simple nocturnal visit.” she replied with a low voice.

Something caught my attention when she lifted her face. Her eyes were red and watery, as if she'd rubbed them repeatedly.

— “Can I come in?” she asked with a faint smile.

She didn't look well and I don't think I'm the best person to help her but I couldn't leave her alone. I moved away from the entrance so she could join me. She entered silently as I closed the door behind her. This scene was unreal, the princess of the kingdom was with me, in my room and I doubt the king knew anything about it. I don't know what's got into her but I hope it doesn't get me into trouble.

— “You needed something?”

She didn't answer and just looked at me, though there was a hint of sadness about her. I wanted to add something but she stopped me, cause she threw herself onto me to snuggle up against my body. Her arms tightened around my waist and I couldn't stop her. She was shivering and this simple detail froze me in place.

— “Tell me Suzumoto.”

She grabbed my clothes a little tighter.

— “Your world, what is it like?”

I didn't really understand what she was getting at. It was such an abrupt question and I don't think I could give her a very good answer.

— “If I answer your question, you won't have a very unbiased opinion.”

Her face was still buried in the hollow of my chest, she nodded without even looking at me.

— “It does not matter, I still want to know.”

If that's all she wanted to know and it can make her feel better then I had no problem with it.

— “It's very different from yours, we don't have magic and the structures of our buildings are the total opposite. Everything is greyer there, gloomier. My daily life wasn't one of the most interesting, I didn’t really like it there.”

I could have added one more thing: telling her that I felt a bit better here, because that's the truth. The more I think about it the more I find that my world has nothing to envy to this one. I've been able to discover new things, things I'd never have been able to see where I came from.

— “I do not like my world either.” she added.

She stepped back and looked into my eyes. Her mouth opened but then closed again, as she struggled to formulate her words. Then, she released me and tucked her light hair behind her ears. Her clear face, illuminated by the moonlight, faced me.

— “I appreciate you very much. These last few days with you have been really great.”

What's this look of sadness comes from?A subtle laugh escaped me when I saw her.

— “You sound as if I'm about to leave you. But don't worry, I'll always be by your side. After all, I'm the hero who's supposed to save your kingdom. I owe it to myself to carry that title!”

In a surge of great confidence, I held out my little finger to her which she looked at questioningly.

— “What are you doing?”

It’s true that we don't come from the same world. She probably doesn't understand what I was getting at.

— “It's a gesture between two people to conclude a promise. You have to catch my little finger with yours. By doing this you can be sure that I will never betray you, Princess.”

Her eyes went back to my little finger. She took a few seconds to think about what I just said.

— “So, if I do this you promise to always be there for me?”

I nodded repeatedly, delighted that she finally understood the meaning of my gesture.

— “If I'm not being silly, a knight would have to say something like I'd give my life for you?”

She laughs out loud at my stupid words.

— “I would not wish your death over my protection. Let us rather say... Ah, I know!” 

An idea just crossed her mind as her face suddenly brightened up. She took my finger with hers, so enthusiastic that you could almost forget her moment of weakness a few minutes ago. Her eyes met mine, she said these words to me.

— “Protect me when I need it.”

The words stuck in my mind. I smiled back at her, shaking my little finger intertwined with hers.

— “That's a promise.”

A seemingly childish exchange but one that sealed a pact of trust between us. I won’t go back on my word, that's something she can count on. I will never betray her words. Casthy continued to watch me, smiling.

— “Let us call each other by our first name, so… Keiji…”

— “Yes that’s me. Did you want something else Casthy?”

She denied slowly with her head.

— “I simply wanted to see you.. I won't bother you any longer, have a nice evening.”

She waved at me before leaving my room for good. The door closed quietly, I was now all alone. She seemed to be feeling better, or not really. Despite her subtle smile I could see a veil of sadness in her eyes. I don't know what was on her mind but I hope she’s going to be okay. It's getting rather late, I really should be getting some sleep.

But I couldn't get to sleep. Her visit disturbed me since I couldn't really figure her out. What did she want from me? What did she want me to be for her? There was one thing I could be sure of though, that was that she liked me ever since I spoke to her in the garden.

Her life at the castle doesn't seem to be easy, talking and exchanging with someone from the outside must surely bring her some comfort. A different vision from her domestics, her maids and her father, the king. All these principles to which she has to respond without being able to express her point of view or what she really wants. I hope that one day she'll be able to find what suits her the best and that she won't be swallowed up by everything that's expected from her, unlike me.

I have to stop dwelling on the past, I need to draw a line under everything that happened to me. But how can you forget when your own family is at the heart of this tragedy? Casthy and I aren't so different after all.