We’re greeted when our rocket lands by a bunch of multi-colored aliens. I’m a little disappointed. I’ve read millions of science ficton books, being practically alone on a plant will do that to you. But this? This wasn’t exactly what I had in mind. If I wanted to see purple and orange and polka-dotted humans, I would just go to the circus or something. The aliens move out of the way of our spaceship’s retractable ramp, and we walk down. So this must be what it’s like to walk down the red carpet! Flashes of light come from either side of the crowd, probably coming from cell phones or something. Then there’s a commotion from the inside. 4 cops push their way through the crowd. 2 have their ray guns raised. I freeze like ice. (Haha, get it? Ice? My name is Concord Ice?)

“Nobody move.” One of the cops say. “Or we will shoot.”