POV: Darleen

I had a strange flashback moment when I woke up in the morning. Skylar was laying cuddled up next to me. Her head resting on my chest. It was like I was back in high school and we were dating. She used to lay just like this with me.

What is with me lately?

All I can think about is her.

I keep telling myself not this again. That the ship has sailed. That it will never happen. But no matter how much I argue with myself, I can't deny the way she makes me feel inside. I never could. There is just something about her. Something that makes her different from all the other girls.

She's always stood out to me.

The fact that she tries so hard at everything she does just to make everyone happy. The fact that she refuses to be the stand-out person. She likes being the background girl, she likes just watching other people be happy. She's so... I can't even describe it. So Skylar I guess.

Part of me feels like I am setting myself up for failure and heartbreak all over again. Like no matter what I do or say, she's over me. She doesn't see me like that. She'll never see me like that.

But what if there is a chance?

What if...

Stop it. Get a grip Darleen. Don't do this again. She just got out of a long-term relationship with the girl she thought was her true love. Give me a break, I'll be lucky if she even gives me a second glance. I can't live up to those expectations no matter what Jade says.

Not to mention that Vida girl.

She and Skylar have some type of bond. She loves Skylar and maybe... maybe Skylar likes her back. If that's the case then I've already lost before the battle has even begun. Why? Why do I have to keep falling for this girl? The girl whose heart has already been spoken for twice over.

I sigh and turn my body to nuzzle closer to Skylar.

I wish I could stay like this forever.

Skylar mumbles in her sleep and cuddles closer to me.

I smile and wrap my arms around her.

She sighs in content.

Is it bad that I don't even feel guilty for being all cuddled up with another girl? That I haven't even thought about Lexi twice since I came to see Skylar? That I would gladly make love to Skylar if she let me? I wouldn't even give it a second thought.

Does that make me a bad person?

I kiss Skylar on the head and close my eyes to try and fall back asleep.

Sadly I have a plane to catch and Skylar needs to get to class. So even though I would gladly lay here with her all day, I can't.

"Wifey," I lightly shake her.

She jolts awake and takes a few quick breaths. She must have been having a nightmare.

"Hey," I say.

When her eyes meet mine, she sighs in relief and relaxes in my arms once more.

"You okay?" I ask.

She nods.

"Morning sleepy head," I smile.

"Morning." She gives me a sleepy smile back.

"So, what new thing are you going to try today?" I ask.

She thinks about it for a second before she says, "art."

"Yeah?"

"I think I'll try painting today."

"Sounds fun. Better send me a pic of the finished product."

"I will."

"What about you? How are you going to get one step closer to achieving your goal?" she asks.

"I think I'll give that girl a compliment today."

"That's nice. She'll definitely notice you then."

"Think so?"

"Yeah."

I wonder how long it will take her to figure out that the girl in question is actually her. Maybe I'll make a game of it. See how long it takes for her to realize that the girl I've been in love with for a while is her.

"We should get up; I want to take you and your pretty eyes to breakfast before I have to catch that flight."

"I don't have pretty eyes," Skylar sits up and stretches.

"Do too, like the sky on a nice spring day. Your eyes are a never-ending sea of beauty." I say.

"Shut up," she laughs and gets up.

"Too corny?" I sit up.

"Way too corny. Better not use that line on the girl." She chuckles before looking for something to wear.

Too late.

"Why? You think she doesn't like corny?" I smirk.

"Probably not."

"Do you like corny? I mean you did laugh," I point out.

"As long as it makes me smile one way or another then I don't care." She picks out a shirt.

"Then maybe the girl doesn't care either."

"Maybe," she shrugs.

I get up and stretch before going to my bag and grabbing a change of clothes. Luckily, I packed for such an occasion where I might miss my flight and need to stay another day.

We get washed up and ready and head out to eat. Skylar orders a large stack of pancakes with tones of syrup and whipped cream. With just a few banana slices. Some things never change, I guess.

She's so cute when she eats.

Sadly, it's all over way too fast. We part ways at the restaurant as she heads off to class and I head off to the airport. I feel somehow hollow without her. So strange I never noticed how empty I felt until I remembered what it felt like to feel full.

When I get home I quickly unpack before heading off late to class.

Lexi was waiting for me.

"Hey, where have you been? I tried calling." She says.

"I had a mini emergency to attend to. All is good though."

"What happened?"

"You remember Skylar?"

"Yeah, the redhead."

"She broke up with Jade and sort of had a mini breakdown. I was scared she was going to hurt herself. So I rushed over. She's okay though."

"Oh, well that's good."

"Yeah..."

"Are you okay?" she asks.

"Can you meet me after class, I want to talk," I say.

"Sure." She shrugs just as our professor walks in.

After classes, Lexi meets me at our usual spot. I shove my hands in my pockets and take a deep breath. There is and never will be an easy way to say what I am about to say. I wish there was.

"I've been thinking," I start.

"About?"

I grab her hand and lead her over to a bench where we sit down.

"Us," I say.

"What about us?"

"Alexandria Rutledge, you are an amazing person. I will always be here for you and be your friend."

"Where are you going with this?" she squeezes my hand.

"But... only your friend." I finish.

"What?"

"I don't want us to get back together."

"Why?" she jerks her hand back.

"I don't love you like that anymore."

"What!? But—"

"I'm sorry I led you on. Things have just been so messy with us. Everything about this was messy. I really do care about you. So much. That's why I stayed by you for so long. I couldn't stand to see you suffer alone. I wanted to help you. But when I think about being with you like that again... I already feel exhausted."

"Where is all this coming from?"

"Seeing Skylar break up with Jade. Watching her end a long-term relationship and seeing how it destroyed her made me realize I don't want that for us. I don't want to put myself through what she put herself through. I don't want you to think everything is okay when it's not. I'm not going to force this thing along when you and I both know it's not working anymore."

She clenches her jaw and nods, tears falling silently down her face.

"Lexi this doesn't mean we can't still be friends or that I don't want to see you anymore. I still want to help you get better. I still want to see this through to the end. I want you to stay sober and clean. I want you to graduate with flying colors. I want you to be happy."

"I'm sorry, but I'm going to need some time." she quickly gets up and runs off.

I sigh and run my hands down my face.

Why are breakups so hard?

My phone dings from a new text.

I open it to see a bad painting of flowers.

'what do you think?' Skylar asks.

I snort in amusement out loud before replying.

'I think you better keep searching.'

'yeah me too, also do you know how to get paint stains out of jeans?'

I send back laughing emojis.

She sends back a face with a nervous sweat drop.

'how did the girl take the compliment? Were you corny?'

'I was, and she laughed.' I reply.

'way to go! At least she knows who you are now.'

'Yeah.'

At least she knows who I am.

That's a start.

Maybe it is hopeless and completely reckless and absurd.

But I don't care.

For some reason, I really like that girl. She has a way of getting me right in the heart. I'm not going to give up yet. Skylar Clifton will be mine. This time, I'm sure of it. The only thing standing in the way now is my own doubts. I'll get her to fall for me.

For real this time.

And when the time is right, I'll tell her how I feel. Regardless of whether or not she returns my feelings, at least I can say I had fun on this journey of self-discovery with her. I will respectfully bow out if she rejects me because her happiness is all that really matters to me.

If she finds true love before I tell her, then I will support her. I want nothing but the best for her.

If fate does exist she'll help me out on this one.

After all, she owes me.

I could have been with Skylar all along if fate hadn't intervened.

You hear me fate? You owe me!

You better not mess it up this time or I'm coming for you.

That's a Darleen Grayson guarantee.