“No,” his lawyer replied. John gave him a puzzled look.

“I told you I don’t care about any of that,” John said, looking at both of us.

“None of that is happening, there is no divorce.” He elaborated. “Annabelle, you have to stop this bullshit.”

“Peter!”

“I’m sorry, but I’m not going to accept this divorce.” Peter waved his hand in the air. “And you, don’t act like you’re with her in this nonsense.”

Charles sighed in defeat and cleared his throat. “I’m sorry, Anna, but I agree with Peter.”

“I knew it, having you both as our lawyers would suck! what the hell are you both saying now? I wanted, no, we wanted to end this marriage in peace, and we called you two to do so.”

“You two love each other, and this is just a rough time; you can move past it.” said Charles.

John looked at me; I know he loves me, and I still do. But, unlike in the past, our failed pregnancy journey has truly broken us. I can’t stay in this marriage, and he can’t either.

“Yes, but it’s the right thing to do.”

“OK, put the love crap away; now is not the time to divorce.” Peter said as he took off his blazer. “He’s about to take over as CEO, and he and his family are in a critical political situation with the White House. Any personal shit will be a huge hassle for the entire family.”

“It has nothing to do with our personal lives.” I’m annoyed how everything, including my own divorce, was slipping through my fingers.

“It has everything to do with your lives, you’re fucking married into the Lightwoods! They are America’s royalty! The negative press that will follow both of you is unpredictable. Nobody cares about your feelings, your miscarriage, or anything else!”

“What the fuck man?!”John smacked him on the shoulder. I admired Peter’s honesty and practicality. Since I met him in college, he has always been the brutally honest one.

I averted my gaze. I don’t need his honesty right now. “I’m sorry, Anna. ”He grabbed my hand and squeezed it quickly. “What I’m trying to say here is that divorce now will cause chaos for everyone, your family and his are intertwined in many businesses, it will be a true headache to go through, his CEO position is at the mercy of the board of directors, which includes your father and brothers, and your career can also suffer as a result of such a situation.”

“What! my writing career is far from all of that!”

It was the only thing I call mine. The only thing I can control.

“Don’t get me wrong: you’re a gifted writer, and no one can deny that, but your name shone brightly in the writing world after you became a Lightwoods.” Peter was aware that he had said the wrong thing yet again. “Anna, please think before you do something you’ll regret later. I know your marriage ended a long time ago but consider yourself now; you don’t need the bad press at the time of your comeback, and neither do you.” He said this while looking at John, who remained silent.

“Perhaps you should give yourself another chance and reconcile your love for each other.” said Charles, Peter agreed with him. I couldn’t keep that small chuckle from escaping my throat. John looked at me.

“Our relationship ended long before I said we wanted a divorce; trust me, there’s nothing here to be reconciled.”

I returned my gaze to John, who appeared unhurt. He was also aware of it. The love we have now is purely nostalgic. For our previous friendship before it blossomed into love. I was breaking up with John, my husband, not my friend.

“I can’t deny it, there’s nothing left here.” John stated.

“Fine! Don’t get back together, there’s no love here, I couldn’t care less, but for God’s sake, this divorce isn’t going to happen, at least not right now.” Peter stated.

“What do you want us to do now? keep pretending?” I questioned.

“Yes, indeed!”

“No way. I don’t want to waste my life any longer!” I almost yelled at him. I looked at John and smiled apologetically.

“Just for now, until your book is published, and he gets the job, and I promise you that I will divorce you both in the blink of an eye.”

I sighed, exhausted even more than before. “Fine.”