Lucas

When we arrive home from her appointment, the girl’s excited squeals greet us at the door. In an instant, Embree’s demeanor changes. Before my eyes, the somber, broken girl who avoided my gaze and remained silent during the ride home transforms into a joyful, loving mother. The abrupt change is so stark, it sets off a whole host of alarms in my head.

I knew she did this.

I observed it firsthand when I first returned to Ruby Creek, but until now, I never fully grasped how adept she is at burying her true emotions. The artificial facade she presents seems effortless, which is disheartening and leaves me questioning how much of what she shows me is also an act. While I believe I’m perceptive enough to see through the walls she builds to keep others out, I can’t shake the nagging doubt that perhaps I may not be able to read her as well as I thought. It fills me with a sense of unease and makes me wonder if there are times when she’s with me when she’s only pretending to be happy like she’s doing now with the girls.

For the rest of the day, I give Embree her space. It’s clear she’s not ready to talk, and with the girls around in addition to my mounting anxiety, I figure it’s best to wait until this evening to sit her down and push the issue. I don’t expect her to divulge everything, but I need to ensure she understands I won’t let her shut me out indefinitely. I’m willing to wait, but to do so, I need to be able to trust her. Something I can’t do if she continues to hide or pretend nothing is wrong. I thought our conversation yesterday clarified that fact, but it seems this time I’ll need to be more assertive. I meant what I told her. I refuse to allow our newfound relationship to regress after everything we’ve already overcome.

By the time we sit down for dinner, nothing has changed. Embree still wears that flawless smile she’s honed over the years. She laughs at the appropriate times, her gaze avidly drifting between Zeb, James, the girls, and me as we engage in conversation. Yet, every now and then, I catch a fleeting glimpse of the sorrow she’s striving to conceal. It becomes more pronounced as dinner unfolds, and for the first time, I realize how difficult it must be for her to keep up the pretense.

As usual, Zeb and James are the first to finish. They gather their dishes and leave the dining room to return to the control room for the evening perimeter check. Their departure plunges Embree and me into an uncomfortable silence that we awkwardly attempt to fill by focusing on helping the girls finish their meals. The air is thick with tension, and with every passing minute, it becomes increasingly difficult to ignore it.

“Alright, girls, bath time. Go on upstairs and start getting ready,” Embree tells them.

“Yay!” Alyssa squeals, then turns to me. “Uncle Luc, you’re coming with us, right?”

“Uncle Luc has done more than enough, so tonight, we’re giving him a break.”

At Embree’s response, my eyes snap to her. Since the drone incident a month ago, I’ve been the one giving the girls their nightly baths. It’s become our thing, and the feeling that she’s taking something so precious away from me is like a punch to the gut. The fact she won’t look at me, even as my eyes plead for her attention, only adds to the frustration and hopelessness expanding in my chest.

Clearing my throat, I glance over at the two little girls who are as much a part of me as the woman who unknowingly is tearing out my heart. “Go on up girls, I promise I’ll be there to help your mama tuck you in.”  

By the time the girls leave the room, Embree’s already rushed off to the kitchen. Unable to let this go, I grab the few remaining dishes and go off in search of her. Her back is to me as she stands at the sink. Her rigid posture and stiff movements are evidence she’s steeling herself for a confrontation. It both hurts my heart and pisses me off, but I tamp it down, swallowing the poison churning in my gut in favor of proving to her that regardless of what’s happening, all I want is to be there for her.

Setting the dishes on the counter next to the sink, I reach around her to turn the water off, before wrapping my arms around her so I can pull her back against my chest. Desperate for the comfort only she can provide, I bury my nose in her hair, taking in her sweet scent before dropping a tender kiss on the side of her head. To my relief, she melts into my embrace, and it’s like we both breathe out a collective sigh. This time the silence that descends is welcomed and, for the first time today, the world feels right. The realization fills me with a deep sense of relief, for it reaffirms that this pull between us is stronger than the external forces working against us.

Gently, I turn her in my arms, and when those sad whiskey eyes refuse to look at me, I crouch down to meet her gaze. “I love you,” I say softly, pausing for a moment to allow my words to sink in. When her tear-filled eyes return to me, I continue, “I know you’re not ready to talk, but I need to know this one thing, and you have to be honest with me. Did I do something wrong? Something that makes it so you don’t trust me with the girls tonight?”

“No, Lucas,” she shakes her head adamantly. “It’s not that. It’s just… there’s so much happening right now. My life with the girls has changed so much and sometimes I miss how things used to be. Not the uncertainty, but the simplicity of my time with them. Since everything blew up with Creed, nothing’s been the same. For once, I just need things to feel the same.”

“You feel out of control.” With my thumb, I wipe away the lone tear trailing down her cheek. When she closes her eyes and nods, I lean in to drop a kiss on her forehead. “I understand, sweetheart. Why don’t you go on up and be with the girls? I’ll take care of the dishes and get everything cleaned up, then I’ll come up to say goodnight. Will that be alright? If I say goodnight and help tuck them in?”

“Yes,” she breathes out in what sounds like relief, then steps up on her toes to brush her lips over mine in an all too brief kiss. “Thank you for understanding.”

“I’m here for you, Emb, just as much as I’m here for them. You’re not alone anymore. Whatever I can do to make life a little easier, say the word and I’ll make it happen.”

“Okay.”

“Now go on. I’ll wrap things up down here.”

Watching her leave the kitchen, it feels like some of the oppressive weight smothering me has lifted. I know there is more going on, but that she answered my question without hesitation goes a long way toward allaying my fears. As long as she keeps talking, I know we can get through this.

When I finish cleaning up, I go in search of the guys to get their help with putting my plan into action. Embree’s struggling, and given how overwhelmed she is, it’s my job to lessen her burdens. I need to show her I am here for her regardless of what’s happening. I want her to trust me. Most of all, I want her to feel like she can lean on me.

As I promised the girls, I make it upstairs in time to listen to Embree reading them a bedtime story. Afterward, she and I work together to tuck them in. As I close their bedroom door behind us, Embree leans against the wall next to me. She looks defeated and utterly exhausted.

“Come here,” I pull her into my arms, and for the next few seconds, we stand there breathing each other in. “I have a surprise for you if you’re up for spending a little time with me.”

When she doesn’t respond right away, my heart sinks, but just as I’m about to offer to tuck her into bed, she agrees. “Yeah. Okay.”

Taking her hand, I lead her back downstairs, through the foyer, then to the living room. Along the way, I shut off all the lights. The entire back wall of the living room is floor-to-ceiling windows that look out onto the yard. For what I have planned, the sky will give us the only light we’ll need. 

As I guide her out to the back patio, she asks, “Where are we going?”

“We’re putting the sun to bed, and while we’re at it, saying hello to the moon and stars,” I explain. When her eyes flicker with an emotion I recognize from our childhood, I can’t help the smile that lights up my face. Thank God, it looks like I finally got something right.

Just as I asked, James has moved the free-standing hammock down to the grassy area off the deck. I can tell when she realizes my plan by the way her hand relaxes in mine.

“Take off your sandals, sweetheart,” I tell her as I toe off my shoes.

Without letting go of her hand, I slide into the hammock, and after making room for her, I guide her to lie next to me in my arms. When she’s settled comfortably, I lift her chin and give her a quick kiss. Then, as I planned, we sink back into the peaceful silence of the sunset. The sun has just dropped below the horizon, painting the sky in moody shades of orange, red, and blue. Fluffy clouds reflect the last rays of the melting sunlight as they float away, leaving behind the serenity only dusk can bring.

This right here is perfectly us.

Next comes the hard part. 

It’s time I make it clear to her that what happened today can never happen again.

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Author’s Note:

Unlike he would have done in the past, Lucas is ready to push Embree for answers. Bottom line, he's starting to realize that to keep the relationship moving forward, he needs to show her he's willing to fight for their love.

What do you think about this chapter? Are you concerned about how Embree will react if he pushes her too hard?

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