The tray of food stared back at him as if to mock how pathetic he was. To get told by the very man who was the reason for his absolute lack of appetite to eat because ‘he was gonna need the strength.’
What was he even gonna need the strength for? Maybe it was better to just starve himself and die before he could actually put everyone he loved in danger for his lack of rationality. But was it really irrational to want to be set free? Why was it so hard to just let him go without anyone noticing if the prince was so worried about the others getting their hands on him? The answer was simple. Because he was a hypocrite liar who probably only wanted him to himself and didn’t want to share.
Swallowing the bitter taste in his mouth, he tore his eyes away from the cold food and walked toward the bathroom. His hands and thigh were all covered in dried blood and he could smell the alpha’s scent on himself. He needed to shower before the strong scent would get to him and that was really the last thing he needed to completely lose his dignity.
He didn’t really register when he had stepped into the tub and turned on the water, it had all been on autopilot. He only came back to it when the water started getting too cold from him just standing under the shower for far too long. As if on cue, his body started shuddering at the extreme coldness that ran under his skin.
cold cold cold cold
He could hear the sound of his teeth chattering. Just for how long had he been there?
Jumping out of the tub first before turning off the water, he wrapped the thickest towel around himself tightly and ran out, mind only set on getting himself under the blankets. Only that when he was a couple of meters away from the bed he saw the sleeping figure of the man he had stabbed and everything came back to him. Ah, he had forgotten it all while freezing to the bone.
He was still freezing, so he had no other choice but to ignore all the warnings in his head and crawl under the blanket. The prince was lying on the covers, body probably hot enough to not need the extra warmth.
Walking on his tiptoes with naked feet, he lifted the cover on the other side of the giant bed and carefully slipped under it, pulling it up to his nose as the water drops kept tickling his body and scalp as they rolled on his skin under the towel. He was too caught up waiting to feel the crippling cold fade away he didn’t realize how loud he sniffled. Or maybe it wasn’t too loud and the prince was simply sensitive to sound.
“Why are you shivering so intensely?”
One glance to the side was enough to see the man’s eyes on himself while he still lay on his back, head only tilted toward him with a lifted eyebrow.
“Stood under the shower for too long.” It even hurt to talk.
“I doubt being cold is the only reason for being in this state. It’s probably the effect of the adrenaline from earlier, too.” The low voice said quietly before he heard some shuffling. He didn’t see the older because he had his eyes closed, but they opened wide when an arm wrapped around his waist under the blanket and he was pulled into a warm embrace.
“Let go of me.” He pushed his palms on the firm chest with the little strength he had left after two days of not eating at all.
“Stop being stubborn and just let my scent calm your senses a bit.” Arms wrapped around him tighter as Namil pulled him flush against his chest, preventing him from any further struggles, but he didn’t give up. Trying to set himself free using all of his body he hissed in disgust. “You calming me down is the last thing I want.”
It happened without warning, like all the things up until that point. The prince’s hand traveled up, toward the left side of his neck, before his thumb pushed into where his scent gland would be with an insane amount of pressure. Insu immediately winced in grave pain silently because it hurt so much in a split second that he lost his voice and his body grew numb.
“There you go. Now shut up and get some sleep before you manage to make me angry again.” The older rubbed the thumb that had just almost made him blackout over the junction of his neck.
“Why would it be me making you angry when all you do is abusing me in whatever way you want?” He forced himself to say, although his skin was tingling in a weird sensation. The skin under the other’s thumb burning at the touch.
“Abuse you? I’ve never done anything to you that would be indicated as abuse.” The latter said neutrally before leaning in slightly and closing his lips around Insu’s scent gland, nibbling on it and humming lazily.
A shiver ran down his spine at the feeling of his skin rolling between sharp teeth. Without him knowing it, he had fisted on Namil’s shirt tightly.
“Do you really not realize that even right now you’re abusing me? You just hurt me by pushing on my scent gland and now you’re-” He had to inhale for a second not to moan at the sensation and not to bare his neck like a hypocrite.
“That wasn’t abuse. I needed you to stop squirming and it was the quickest way to achieve it. See? Your body’s not trembling anymore and your skin is warm again.” Lips traveled over his neck, the man sniffing deeply as his hands tightened even further around him.
“I didn’t ask for your help in the first place and that’s what makes it abuse. My body would stop trembling even without you forcing your freaking pheromones on me again.” He fought against the dizzying scent that clouded his senses the best he could. “I might have the body of an omega and I admit now that it has its weaknesses, I get it, but it doesn’t mean I have to succumb to your every wish. I won’t. No matter how-” He paused to hiss when Namil’s teeth nibbled a little harder on his neck. Insu tried his best to push him away again. “No matter how much you beat me up or use me like this, I won’t ever be tamed the way you want me to. You might as well go ahead and execute me, I don’t care anymore.” The rising need made him feel all sorts of helplessness and self-hatred. Tears started to well up in his eyes as he tried one last time to push the muscular body away. By now, he knew very well that if the other decided to take him at that moment, there was simply nothing he could do to prevent it from happening. He only had to keep his mind strong to not break, although something told him that not caring about his life meant that he was already a little broken somewhere deep inside.
“You don’t care anymore?” The prince leaned back and stared into his eyes, propped up on his elbow. “Then you won’t mind if I snapped your neck right now? It would be a lot easier for me not having you around, you know?” A firm hand wrapped around his neck, tightening around his pulse until Insu could feel the rush of blood and the increase of pressure in his head. He didn’t really understand why but he didn’t fight at all, somehow convinced Namil wouldn’t actually kill him. Maybe he wanted to see how far the latter would go if he let him.
Fingers loosened after a few seconds and instead of snapping his neck like he had been threatened of, warm lips met his in a lingering closed-mouth kiss, a long-lasting touch without any further movement. When the prince leaned back many seconds later and hugged him close to his chest again, he didn’t struggle anymore. He only buried his head deeper in the warmth the man provided him. There was no harm in simply being embraced after all…
“You should ask Duho what experiencing abuse really feels like. Although I doubt you’d have the heart to watch him break down just remembering the things he’s gone through.” He felt the vibration of the hoarse, tired voice against his cheek along with hearing the sound of Namil’s heartbeat.
“I won’t ask him. But him having it harder than me doesn’t mean I’m not allowed to feel the way I do. You hurt me, both physically and mentally, whether you want to admit to it or not.”
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