Natsu couldn’t feel or sense any magic but he knew when that all-important soundproof barrier was in place the second another finger was inserted deep into his ass, opening him up. He cried out, almost tearing at Toji’s shirt as Toji’s other hand worked the snap on Natsu’s jeans. His mouth covered Natsu’s, his tongue piercing between his teeth as he moaned, begging for more with his body. When Natsu’s jeans dropped to the ground, Toji took his hard cock into hand and began stroking him up and down, pressing the tip and rotating with a gentle squeeze, all the while continuing to open him with the other hand.

Natsu pulled at Toji’s shirt, turning them around so he was against the wall. With practiced movements, he got Toji’s jeans undone, shoving them and his boxer briefs down before taking Toji into his own hand, his heart pounding as his hands remembered the girth and pulsating heat within them. Toji nearly collapsed against Natsu, their lips coming undone as Natsu stroked him. 

Toji yanked Natsu’s hoodie and shirt off in one fell swoop, leaving him practically naked in front of him. Natsu kept his heavy-lidded gaze on Toji as he moved his arms around his neck. Toji lifted him up against the wall and placed the tip of his hardness against Natsu’s waiting hole.

“I hope you’re ready for this,” Toji said, his teeth glinting sharp in the moonlight.

Natsu gulped and nodded, his body trembling in Toji’s arms. “Keep them hidden,” he said. “Please.”

Toji smiled. With one graceful motion, he thrust into Natsu, both of them releasing a loud cry of pleasure, Natsu’s hands going immediately into Toji’s hair as Toji’s mouth found his shoulder. However, before he did the one thing he desperately wanted to do, outside of fucking the man’s brains out, he turned his wrist inward, opening his skin with one sharp incisor. He turned it back to Natsu who gripped it with one hand. He nodded to Toji and, at the same moment he brought Toji’s bleeding wrist to his lips, Toji sank his fangs deep into Natsu’s shoulder, and they both began to drink.

They both knew the sex itself wouldn’t last very long, given the time it had been between their last encounter, but it was still damn good and worth the agonizing wait. On top of that, their blood sharing only increased their lust, driving them to move faster, Natsu’s hips bucking wildly against Toji as Toji thrust relentlessly into him. Neither of them bothered to stifle their noises, Natsu trusting in Toji’s barrier as he always did.

When the pressure began to build, Natsu bit down into Toji’s wrist. Neither of them said a word, they didn’t need to. The joint pull of their mouths against their bleeding flesh was cue enough. 

With a few more deep thrusts, Toji pulled his fangs from Natsu’s shoulder, blood flying from the wound as he came hard, crying out Natsu’s name, his body convulsing from the intensity. Natsu’s own orgasm shot free, but instead of releasing Toji’s wrist, he bit down harder, he just stopped sucking the blood he was given. He spilled onto Toji’s bare stomach, both of them gripping each other for dear life as each wave ripped through their bodies.

It felt like forever before they were finally able to relax. Even after Toji slipped from Natsu, he still held him tightly against the wall, Natsu’s legs wrapped firmly around him, his arms around his neck, his fingers in Toji’s hair. Their passion faded away, but the truth of their emotions remained. Natsu wanted to hear the words, not just feel them. He knew Toji wanted the same but they both knew it was impossible. If they said them now, things would only get harder for them and Toji didn’t want that. Not for Natsu.

“I can’t…” Toji whispered against Natsu’s neck. He wanted to…they were right there on the tip of his tongue, but he couldn’t. The time just wasn’t right.

Natsu’s shoulders began to shake as his tears came.

“I’m sorry, baby, but I can’t.”

Five years, the last two becoming intimate, and the words they longed to say still hung like mist around them. 

“Can you tell me,” Natsu sobbed. “That there’s no one else? That I’m still the only one? That I’m still yours?”

“There will never be anyone else, Natsu. You’re mine and I’m yours. It’s been that way since the beginning and nothing will ever change that fact.”

“So then why can’t you tell me you lo—”

“You know why. It’s the same reason why you can’t tell me the same.”

Toji pulled away, his forehead against Natsu’s, his red and blue eyes searching Natsu’s face. “Please,” he begged him, kissing his wet cheeks. “Please don’t look at me like that again.”

“I cried, Toji,” Natsu said, the tears falling like waterfalls from his bright green eyes. “For weeks and weeks, I sobbed, praying, hoping you’d come back. Why didn’t you?” His voice rose, his pent up emotions breaking free.

Toji couldn’t answer without hurting him and they both knew it. The words “I couldn’t” were two words Natsu had grown to hate coming from his lover’s lips. 

“Did you cry?” Natsu asked. “Did you shed one single fucking tear for me?”

Toji shook his head. “I shed far too many,” he whispered, holding Natsu’s face in his hands. “For months I tried to get back, in every way I could think of, but no matter what I did, I…” He cut himself off, swallowing hard. “I’m sorry, Natsu. I wanted to come back to you sooner, I wanted to be here with you, away from all those duties and ceremonies and other useless, pointless things I’m being forced to take part in.” 

He kissed Natsu softly, letting him slide down to his feet, but not letting him go. “I even tried to find a way to bring you there.”

“You did?” Natsu sniffed, a small laugh escaping his throat.

Toji nodded his head against Natsu’s. “I asked anyone I could think of if there was a way to bring you over without suffering any ill effects but no one could give me an answer.” He cleaned himself off, licking it off his fingers, before reaching down and pulling his pants up, Natsu doing the same. They sat against the wall, Natsu between his legs and Toji wrapped his arms around him, resting his head against Natsu’s shoulder as Natsu leaned back into him. “It’s a good thing I know some mind tricks to prevent any unnecessary questions from being asked.”

“Did you ever think to ask your dads?”

“Ha!” Toji laughed. “Yeah and get outed for being with you? Sorry, sweetheart, but I prefer you alive and available to me at all times.” He kissed Natsu’s neck, his breath hot against Natsu’s skin as he said, “You’re mine, remember?”

A thought occurred to Natsu. “I drank your blood, though.”

“Mhm, many times.”

“Wouldn’t I have acquired some of your abilities?”

“Not enough to matter.” Toji’s arms tightened around him. “Has anything changed for you? Outside of you becoming far more beautiful than is humanly allowed?”

Natsu rolled his eyes but sighed. “Not that I’ve really noticed. My senses are the same, I still can’t feel any magic or anything. I heal a little faster, I think, and I have more energy, but that’s really it.”

“Well, damn,” Toji said under his breath. He lifted his head and let it rest against the wall. “I don’t understand why there hasn’t been any changes.”

Natsu turned his gaze to the soft dirt at his feet. “I have an idea, but you’ve already made it clear it can’t be said, so…”

Toji stiffened around him. “That doesn’t mean I don’t feel it, Natsu.”

Natsu turned in his arms, his eyes dancing over Toji’s face.

“I didn’t make you promise not to be with anyone else for shits and giggles,” Toji said, his brows knitting together. “You’re mine for a reason. Just like I’m yours. This isn’t a game to me, it never has been. I literally belong to you, Natsu Kanaki. My heart belongs to you. Just because I can’t say it, for very obvious reasons, doesn’t mean I don’t feel it. I feel it every minute of every day whether we’re together or apart. If I’ve been alone in this all this time, then tell me now. Tell me I didn’t go through hell for nothing, Natsu, please. Because if I did—”

Natsu shut him up with a fierce kiss, his hand gripping the side of Toji’s face as their lips moved together. When he pulled away, he was frowning.

“Don’t be stupid,” he said. “Of course you’re not alone in this. I feel it, too, just as strongly. You think you were the only one in pain today? Let alone this past year? I was a complete wreck waiting for you, worried that maybe things had changed, that you didn’t want me anymore after what happened…after how you left…” he swallowed, trying to push the painful memory aside. “Toji, I can’t be your soulmate, I get that. But I’m still yours regardless. You have my heart and my soul, for what it’s worth anyway.” He moved to straddle Toji’s lap, Toji’s hands resting on his thighs.

“You’re here with me now,” he said. “Yes, I wanted you to stay, wanted you to come back and take me with you, but you’re here now. And for the next two months, I’m not letting you go.”

Toji grinned. “Promise?”

Natsu nodded. “Promise.”

The smile slipped from Toji’s lips and he sighed. “It’s going to be harder than usual to be together like this. I know I don’t have to find any excuses to get you to join in on the fun, but getting to hold you, to kiss you…” he took one of Natsu’s nipples into his teeth, eliciting a moan as Natsu dug his fingers into Toji’s shoulders. “To fuck you…” he licked Natsu’s nipple, kissing it before moving up to his collarbone. “All of it is going to be unbearably hard.” As if to illustrate, he pulled Natsu against him, his cock already hard once again.

Natsu drew in a breath. “Lay me down this time,” he said. “And go slow.”

“How much time do we have?”

Natsu smiled as Toji rolled him onto his back and pulled off his sneakers before sliding his jeans back down, tossing them to the side, his cock bouncing against his stomach. “Hours,” he whispered, reaching out for him. “Tell me I’m still yours, Neko,” he said. “Tell me I’m still your boyfriend, that I didn’t lose you after all.”

Toji smiled down at him, removing the rest of his clothes. “You never stopped being anything that wasn’t mine, Natsu Kanaki. Boyfriend or otherwise.” He kissed Natsu slowly, moving into him gently and with more tenderness than before. “If you ever thought for one second that what happened when I left was a breakup,” he panted, “you’re mistaken.”

Natsu smiled, tears coming to his eyes. “I’ve never been more happy to be wrong in my entire life.” As they moved together, their sounds filling the night sky, the rest of the world deaf to them, they reminded each other just what they could never give up, even if it had to remain a secret.

-*-