Tristan was up and ready to hit the road by seven the next morning. Alice had insisted he take her bed for the night while she kept watch in the girls' room, ensuring he got a proper night's sleep before his long day of driving. He'd assumed Sophie was still snoozing, but as he stepped outside, he found her leaning casually against his car.

She flashed him a dazzling smile. "Ready to go?"

His eyebrows lifted. “Yes?”

“Great! Let’s head out," she said, pushing off from the car and rubbing her hands together in anticipation.

"Hold up, you're not coming," Tristan said, holding up a hand to stop her.

“Oh, come on!” Sophie protested. "Alice is taking the day off, so Bee won't be alone. Do you really want to spend the entire day driving by yourself?"

"Do you really want to spend the whole day cooped up in a car with me? I'm boring, remember?" Tristan countered, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I already took that back! You can't hold that against me forever. Anyway, Alice already said I could go, so it’s fine.”

“She said you could come?”

"Yes!" Sophie exclaimed, bouncing on the balls of her feet.

Tristan eyed her sceptically, then pulled out his phone. "So if I called her right now, that's what she'd say?"

“Yup. Go ahead. She’s awake.”

Tristan studied her for a moment longer, searching for any signs of deceit, but she didn't crack. With a sigh, he dialled Alice's number.

"Hey, Trist," Alice answered, her voice warm. "Everything okay?"

"Uh, yeah, I guess," Tristan said, rubbing the back of his neck. "Did you tell Sophie she could come with me today?"

“I told her she could ask you if she could go with you. Whether you let her or not is up to you," Alice clarified, a hint of amusement in her tone.

"Ah. There's the missing piece of the puzzle," Tristan said, shooting Sophie a pointed look.

"Can I offer my opinion, though?" Alice asked, her voice turning serious.

Tristan leant back against his car. “Sure.”

“It might not be such a bad thing to let her go. It would be a good opportunity for the two of you to get to know one another better, and it would make me feel better for her to have some time out of the house. We used to go out every weekend, but we can’t do that right now because Bee’s too sick to go out or be left home alone. She’s been a real trooper about it, but I do feel bad. It can’t be good for her.”

Tristan let out a deep sigh, his resolve crumbling. "I guess if you managed to convince my dad to agree to all of this, I can't be too mad that you're so good at getting people to do what you want."

"You don't have to, but I'd also feel a lot better knowing you weren't on your own. I know a fourteen-year-old might not seem like the greatest moral support, but she's lived a lot in her short years.”

“I’m fine, but she can come if she wants to. Not my fault if she gets bored, though.”

"Woo!" Sophie shouted, pumping her fist in the air as she overheard Tristan's decision.

Alice's laugh echoed through the phone. "Well, it sounds like she's happy for now. Drive safe."

"Yeah, thanks," Tristan said, ending the call with a sigh.

"Did you eat breakfast?" Sophie asked as they climbed into the car. "I brought some snacks for the road. Want any?"

"Uh, maybe later," Tristan said, starting the engine. "Not really hungry right now."

Sophie nodded, her gaze searching his face. "You nervous?"

"I'm fine," Tristan said, his eyes fixed on the road as he pulled away from the curb.

"It's okay to be nervous," Sophie said, digging through her backpack full of snacks. "When my mum kept calling and talking about visiting, I was so nervous. I don't want to see her again. I feel bad about that, but..." She shrugged, her voice trailing off.

“I get that. I don’t want to see my dad again, either. Or my brother. Fuck ‘em.”

“Yeah? What did they do?”

Tristan hesitated, then shrugged, his shoulders tense. "Nothing too bad. Maybe I'm just a wimp, but whatever. I'm glad I'm out."

“That’s good. Not being resilient is totally underrated.”

Tristan shot her a dubious look. "Pretty sure that's the opposite of a good thing."

“No, it’s awesome! I wish I was less resilient.”

"Uh huh," Tristan said, unconvinced.

"That sounded like bragging, didn't it? Like oooh, I'm so tough. I've been through so much shit. Well, I wish I hadn't, and if you really haven't been through anything too bad and this isn't just some macho bullshit, then I'm really, genuinely glad. Getting out before things get too bad is exactly what you should do! I wish I had.”

“Yeah?” Tristan prompted.

"Yeah. Like, my dad was never around and my mum's mental health has always been really messed up. I don't know what's wrong with her exactly, but she's never been too firmly grounded in reality and it's only gotten worse over time. I had to take care of her a lot, but I was resilient, so I learned to cook and clean when I was pretty little and I even found some ways to make money as I got older. And my mum, she was always trying to date. She'd bring guys home, but they never stuck around long. Most of the time, they'd just get what they wanted and bail, which seems super fucked up to me. To sleep with someone who's not really all there mentally. Would you do that just to get laid? Do you think that's okay?"

"No, I would not bang your mum," Tristan said, his tone dry.

Sophie let out an exasperated sigh. "I mean like, in general. Do you think it's okay to have sex with someone and not really care about them as a person?"

"I mean, I'm cool with casual sex, but it's different if they can't actually consent, right?" 

"Exactly! That's what I'm saying! You know, Alice told me she's glad you're staying with us because she really wants me and Bee to have a guy in our lives who doesn't suck. And I agree. I was starting to think I just didn't like men, but I don't think that's really true. I think I've just seen so many shitty ones that it was hard to feel any other way, but I don't want to feel like that. So this is good.”

“I’ll try not to disappoint.”

"Anyway, I should have been grateful for those innocent days of guys ditching us, because one day, one didn't. He stayed and told me he wanted to help us out and be my dad.”

Tristan felt a chill race down his spine, a sinking feeling in his gut. He had a hunch he knew where this story was headed, and he didn't like it one bit. “Ah.”

"Oh, yeah. It was exactly what you think." Sophie's voice was flat and her eyes distant. “And the thing is, I knew it, too. Right from the start. He thought I’d be all naive and vulnerable and desperate for a proper parent, but I’d already been through too much for that. I had to pretend, though. If you think you’re grooming a kid, you take your time, right? If they already know what you’re up to, then…” She shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe you give up, but maybe you don’t. I didn’t want to risk it escalating like that.”

"Jesus. That's beyond fucked up."

"Right! And this is where being resilient gets you. Way too fucking far! I tried telling my mum, but she thought we needed him. That no matter what he was up to, it was better than struggling on our own." Sophie's voice was bitter, tinged with a deep-seated anger. "It was only then that I started tracking down every family member I could find online, which was how I found Alice. If I'd done that sooner, maybe I could have spared myself some trauma. But if I'd waited longer..." She let out a harsh laugh, the sound devoid of humour. "Well, let's just say I'm glad I hit my breaking point and decided to take action. It was the best thing that's ever happened to me."

"Yeah, fuck. Nothing that happened to me was as bad as that," Tristan said, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Good! That’s what I’m trying to say. Not boohoo, I had it worse. Just, you know. It’s not a competition, and if you figured out that you needed a change sooner than I did, I really am happy for you.”

“Yeah, makes sense.”

The air between them was heavy with expectation, the unspoken invitation for Tristan to share his own story hanging in the silence. This would be the perfect moment to tell her he was gay, that his dad was a raging homophobe, and that had been the final straw. But the words lodged in his throat, refusing to come out. He told himself it was because his struggles seemed so small and trivial compared to the horrors she'd just shared, but deep down, he knew that wasn't the truth. He knew he was terrified to say the words aloud, even though he'd literally seen this girl watch gay anime without batting an eye.

Before this whole shitstorm with his dad, he wouldn't have exactly described himself as being out and proud, but he'd been out enough to find guys to fool around with. Last night, he'd texted his boss to let her know he was quitting, and then he'd gone through and blocked and deleted every single number in his contacts. The thought of having any connection to the person he was just a week ago made his gut clench with anxiety. He'd been too open, too unguarded, and it had ended up biting him in the ass. Or at least that was how it felt.

For a couple of hours, Sophie filled the silence with a constant stream of mindless chatter, her voice a welcome distraction from the thoughts swirling in Tristan's head. Then, blessedly, she fell asleep, granting him a few hours of quiet. When she woke up, she was more subdued, as if sensing the growing tension emanating from Tristan as they drew closer to their destination.

Tristan was already regretting letting Sophie come. He'd told himself it would be a quick in and out, that it wouldn't matter if his brother or even his dad was there. He'd dealt with their bullshit a million times before, so why should this be any different?

But it was different, because he'd gotten out. Because this was supposed to be over now, but it wasn't. Not quite yet. He'd sworn to himself he'd never go back, and even if it was just to grab his stuff, it still felt like a betrayal.