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Miko’s Daily Routine: Combat Training 🥋

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*snort* *snort* *OINK*

“This is the most productive way of writing, isn’t it, sugah~?” *mwah* *mwaaaaaah* “Our lips can write the rest of the novel this way~💋” *mwah* *mwaaaaaah* “Gimme some more ink~💋”

Faith snoozes and smooches up her pillow while 🐷devouring🐷 an unlucky prince in her dreams...

Cherry worries about her caretaker swapping between making “very alarming” snorting piggy sounds and mumbling romantic piggy prose…

…Chili thinks being a piggy suits his caretaker very well… 

…we’re not going to talk about that drawing taped on the pillow, so please don’t ask… 

“Yew really are special, sugah~💋 I’m usually so shy~💋” Faith gives the pillow a nibble, country girl style (and yes, she’s been practicing). “Are yew shy too~💋 Yew haven’t said anything in awhile, hun~💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋” Faith giggles and nibbles maliciously. “Yer bringing out ALL the woman in may~💋” *OINK*

*KNOCK* *KNOCK* Faith’s bedroom door has been pounding for nearly an hour, and the door knocker is losing their patience.

“FAITH! COME ON! I’M STARVING!” It’s Dee. *KNOCK* *KNOCK* “ARE YEW IN THERE OR NOT?”

“ARE YOU THERE?”

…

“Are ya there~?”

“There ya are~!”

“A-HA~!”

Faith’s eyes crack open. The Queen of JungleCLUBS (who bears a striking resemblance to that-bitch-who-must-not-be-named) has infiltrated her fantasy!

“Huh? What are you doing locking lips with a piggy!?!?!?” The Queen of JungleCLUBS asks as Faith’s dream cloud drifts away.

“Huh? How are you still alive?” The Princess of SaurDIAMONDS is mildly annoyed.

The Queen of JungleCLUBS glares back at her. “What’s that supposed to…wait…WHY DO YOU HAVE A MONKEY BABY!?!?” She cries. “Dolcezza, how could you!” 

Another “oh-ho-ho-ho” from The Princess of SaurDIAMONDS and Faith’s dream/nightmare dissipates for good…perhaps forever…💔…

*KNOCK* *KNOCK* Dee persists. “Don’t make me break down this-”

*OPEN* Faith stares back at him with the eyes of an exhausted and crushed maiden. The kind who would kill her little brother. Right. Now.

“...breakfast is ready…” Dee makes himself scarce.

Chili tails after Dee in mousey pursuit. 

Faith doesn’t step out and shuts the door instead. She lays her back against it and slides down. *siiiiiiiiigh*

Cherry climbs up Faith’s shoulder, yawns a mousey yawn, and pats Faith’s cheek.

*sigh* “...ok…” Faith rises. “Let’s catch some sunshiiiiine~🎵”

Faith and Cherry take a detour to Faith’s balcony to check today’s forecast.

“Another boyfriend-less morning…” Faith rests her arm on the balcony sill. *yawn*

Cherry squeaks in agreement. *mousey yawn*

Faith Roos, the wannabe Princess of Peachmane. 

Peachmane, West Carolina. A cozy riverside town where the “princess” must gaze upon it from the highest “tower” so that her hair doesn’t get wet, sugah~💖

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A shuffle later~✨

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Oh yeah, breakfast time, let’s go~✨

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“Did you get the job?” Bishop (that’s their Dad, duh!) takes a bite from his plate.

“...I didn’t even go…” Faith sips her tea. *nail check*

“FAITH!”

“...I don’t have to work there, ya know.” 

“Do you have to work anywhere?”

“HMPH! Yew tell may...” *yaaaaaaawn*

“...Faith…”

“...uh oh…” Dee wants to shrivel up.

Chili hides in Dee’s hair.

Bishop huffs and decides to change the subject, but only for a little bit. “Would the unemployed mind going out for errands?”

*yawn~🎵* “Yes, yer majestyyyyyy.” Faith sticks out her tongue and pouts. “I just woke up, and yer tryin’ to drop everything and more on lil’ ol’ may as usual…sheesh…” *yaaaaaaaawn~🎵*

“...this must be what ‘svegliarsi un po' stronza’ means...” Dee has another munch and whispers to Chili. 

A bit of sternness is peppered on Bishop’s voice. “Lil’ missy, if yew showed just a tiny bit of initiative like your-” Then curious about what Dee just said, he looks to the boy. “Talkin’ with yer mouth full has you talkin’ in strange tongues, boy.”

*gulp* “Nah…‘svegliarsi un po' stronza’...it means umm…” Dee carefully thinks the words through with each wave of his finger. “It means 'waking up a lil' bitchy'!” Dee has a big smile.

Chili has a big smile, too, mousey style-

“DEE! LANGUAGE!” Bishop and Faith smack the table.

Cherry smacks the top of Faith’s head. *SQUEAK* *SQUEAK*

Dee and Chili recoil and bounce from the impact of the shouts and squeaks.

“And where did yew hear this one from, boy?” Bishop raises an eyebrow at Dee.

“...frrrrummmm…Fabby.” Dee crunches buttery toast, yummy. He swallows. She talks to me lots about Italian stuff.”

“bitchy” must have worldwide appeal… Bishop chuckles. Bringing the world together. 

Faith squints, and she sips more tea. …that Italian girl…he even calls her “Fabby” now...is she attempting to steal my brother…she can’t be trusted…don’t worry, Dee, your onee-sama will protect yew… *sip* *sip* “What kind of other Italian stuff do y’all talk about?” Faith is quite suspicious (piuttosto stronza).

“You.” Dee smiles.

“Lil’ ol may~?” Faith’s eyes sparkle cuz that sure calmed her down. “And~? Oh~💖 Oh~💖 Oh~💖”

“She thinks it’s really cool that you-”

“Yes, yes~💖” Faith checks her nails. Maybe Fabby isn’t so bad after all…maybe I can let her have the privilege of choosing my nail polish~💖

“-don’t seem to care about fashion, don’t care how much you stuff yourself with food, don’t care how loud you are, and don’t care about boys or friends at all!” Dee nods and takes another bite.

Fabby must die… Faith cries into her tea. I swear never to eat Italian food again as long as I live… *stomach growl*

“She also taught me what ‘onee-sama’ means and thinks it’s weird you’ve been tryin’ to get me to call you that.” *crunch* *munch* “Since we ain’t Japanese.”

“Wonder if she reads those confounded ‘mangos’ too.” Bishop chuckles. “Lil’ lady, why don’t yew show her some hospitality and invite her over someti-”  

*knock* *knock* at the front door. 

*knock* *knock* “Hey! Mr. Roos!” says the front door.

“Ah! Dee, get the door for Witty.” Bishop slices more pancake.

Dee salutes. “Aye, aye, captain.” He pushes himself and his chair back. “Guess I’m the door guy today-”

🥵WITTY!?!?!?🥵 Faith crams a whole stack of toast into Dee’s mouth. “Sit, sugah, sit~💖 You’ve been barking all mornin’ about how hungry you is.” She pushes Dee and his seat firmly back into the table. “Allow your onee-sama to handle Witty’s handle. I mean the door~🥵 The door handle~🥵” Faith takes off and shatters a world record in sprinting.

Dee shrugs and tries his damned best to chew. He doesn’t get it. Sure, Witty is cool, but Faith always gets so weird whenever he’s around. Must be an American girl thing because Italian girls like Fabby seem to have their heads screwed on straight. “AmericangurrllllzzzrightPa?”

“Country girls, son, country girls…” Bishop sighs.

-CHAPTER END-