*Lilian*

Marcus’ words went too far and his cheek was swollen red, his eyes staring right at me, “I’ll be sure to speak to Clio, but you should keep your distance a while Marcus.”

He nodded, “like what I’ve already been doing-”

“leave Marcus.”

Rubbing his red cheek, “And I’ll send the letter tomorrow, be sure to keep your end.” He took the paper from the table, not sparing another glance as he walked out and Walter came in.

The men exchanged glances, Walter surely saw how Marcus held his cheek just now. Walter walked back towards me, “So… Can I ask what happened?”

“Just a petty disagreement.”

“His cheek is red, did he say anything? Maybe I should know what not to say?”

The smile on Walters face honestly made me chuckle at the time, “No, well…” I looked off, feeling the cold breeze, “Get to know me, and figure it out.”

He crossed his arms, “Sounds rather dangerous.” walking behind me before taking my hand, “I’m up for the challenge, nothing like walking into a mysterious den.”

“Well just be sure to be nice, and you’ll be fine.”

“One more question tho. Does this have anything to do with that very boring, and very much fabricated Drama he mentioned?”

I felt even colder. 

Walter looked down at me, “I don’t mind leaving the room for you to talk with friends, but you could be a little more honest about it.”

“It was just something meaningless.”

“Doesn’t feel that way when you speak in riddles till I leave.” He stopped at the doors not going in, “We’re getting married, I need to know you trust me.”

“I trust y-”

“Let me correct myself.” He stood in front of me leaning down, “I need to know you mean it.”

I didn’t know how to meet his eyes, looking past him, “I barely know you.”

I saw a smile on his face for a second, “That’s honest, I prefer that. And I promise you, like I promised your father.” his figure stood back straight, “I am going to stand besides you, and support you every step of the way.”

I could feel a knot on my throat, my fathers face crossing my mind before I focused back on him, “I-”

His hand was warm holding onto mine, walking back into the bustling crowd of people, my eyes landing on faces I’ve known for my whole life and faces I’d never seen before all the same. 

Father. He didn’t even speak to me. Barely glanced at me at all, he talked with Walter just fine however. And Walter would look at me, would smile and go back to talking with my father. What hey said there was a blur, i wasn’t paying much attention. On another hand Marcus, disappeared. After our last talk I saw him once or twice and he was out. Always around Pamella, like he’s using her as a shield against me. 

Pamella would shift wherever she was standing, she’d glance over to me, and the smile she’d pushed out twitching as she tried to keep it up. Leaving me when Marcus walked over before she came back. The other ladies were loud, all the talks where about who was wearing what dress, who was wearing what jewelry and how tasty things were. 

The same couple of words repeating over and over again like stagnant water. Like any other party I’d been to it was bustling and loud even after I left. Settling in for the night in a place I’d never been in before. 

It felt so long till my heels were finally off and tossed aside in the room. Yes, in this very much very quiet room I’d never seen before never been in, sitting on the bed my eyes landed at the door. It reminded me of home, maybe it was the intricate details, or maybe I’m just feeling homesick. 

I haven’t even been gone a full day, but it feels as if I’ve been tossed out. The sound of nothing at all a clear contrast to the loud conversations from before, with the clattering of shoes. 

My hand grabbed at one of the pillows, hugging it close as I stared off at nothing, thinking about Clio. Just how much of it could be true, taking the letters, or following orders from father. Hiding Marcus from me, knowing just what I think of him. I’ve trusted her like i did my own mother, so i cant help but doubt. Because I feel much easier to call Marcus a liar than to call Clio a traitor. 

In the mess of these feelings at least the silence is such a pleasant feeling, helps me think without there being eyes staring at me waiting for a specific reply. Interrupted only by the sudden sound of knocking. 

“Yes?”

“It’s me… Pamella.”

“Well, come on in then,” the door slowly pushed open as her head popped out from the corner, her hair tied up in a bun. 

“Isn’t it fun, they gave me a room close to yours.” She giggled, excitedly closing the door as she turned back to face me. Reminding me of the nights we used to hide under our beds and sneak in treats.

“It’s rather kind.” I’m reminded of Walter. 

“Well yes.” She sat on the bed beside me, “I saw your dad with the Duke.”

“I did too.”

“I heard them mention the wedding.”

“Yes.” I said. “It’s supposed to take place in the summer. And it’s supposed to have a lot of yellow in it.”

“Well you look good in yellow.” Pamella fell back on the bed, tucking her arms behind her head, “And you still have time, you can do anything Lili.”

Our chat was calm, speaking our mind I wound up pacing the room back and forth. The pillow being feathers all around now, holding what was left of it in one hand while throwing feathers at Pamella laying on the floor. 

I remember looking down at her dropping feathers on her when she said this, “ I think he rather suits you.” her words sounded so sincere. But I’m aware as she was, that I didn’t want to hear that.

“Well enough about me Pamella.” I tossed the pillow aside the feathers inside scattering across the floor, “what about your own little romantic endeavors.”

She shrugged, “You know there’s nothing.”

“Well what’s your father said?”

Pamella looked away, avoiding my eyes, “Nothing.”

“Really?”

She nodded, fidgeting with her fingers, “I’m not ready anyways.” She shrugged, dusting herself off from all the feathers, “So I’m fine with having some more time to meet people.” She stood up and grabbing at my arm, “Plus who would keep you company?”

“Well the prince is always a fantastic option, I’m sure you’d catch his eye if you ever went to a royal ball.”

Pamella laughed, “Oh come on, I’m not cut out for those. Besides, even if I went, I’d just waddle behind you.” She huffed, “He might not even like me and wants you to break up your engagement, citing love at fight sight.”

Rolling my eyes I laid back on the bed, “Now you’re just being preposterous.”

Her shoulders raised before they fell again, “Could happen.”

“Highly unlikely.”

“Well it could.”

“It wont.”

“Well I’d bet any daughter of yours could win over a prince, with your fabulous looks, they’d be enchanted-”

“I’d never allow them, we’re more than enough as Duchess, no one can take that from them, besides royalty is too messy.” I grabbed another pillow hugging it tight as I fell on the bed, “They don’t need that.”

“But all that power, if they are anything like you, they’ll take it.”

“If they are anything like me, I’ll let them marry who they love.”

The room fell quiet, I could hear Pamella moving on the bed to the very corner.

“I’m sorry.”

I rolled on my side, seeing her face, “I’m tired.”

“Me too.” She said, “It’s been a long day. You looked very pretty today, I’m sure everyone noticed.”

“Pam.”

Seeing her eyes widen, the hesitation on her face, “Y-yes?”

“Do you think Clio took my letters?” The quiet was answer enough, her eyes refused to look at me, “I need you to tell me.”

“… Maybe.” he voice was barely a whisper, her head hung low, “She just wants to protect you.”

“Good night Pamella.”

I hear her stand up and head to the door, “Good night Lili.”

The door shutting and the quiet felt so different this time around, the silence was not calming after the noise, instead, it built up inside me. All this talk about a prince and a future no one can know was suffocating when I thought about it. 

No different from any other chat we’ve ever had, and i much rather blame a long day, than an old friend. 

My eyes tightly shut in a room I don’t recognize, my chest feels heavy in a cold bed. It really has been a long day, and I just want it to end.