The scene began on the edge of a forest. 

At this time of night, there were more creatures asleep than awake. Alexander looked around him with the vague sense that he had forgotten why he was standing there. 

His ears picked up on a faint sound, mixed in with the intermittent chattering of nocturnal animals. A lilting melody - almost a lullaby - was being sung in the distance. 

It was then that he recalled his purpose for being here. 

It was their first anniversary. He had been away for months at a time on expeditions. This time, he had been away for a month. The expedition was still going on, but he had taken a few days off, citing personal circumstances. Even though he sensed that the woman he had married under unusual circumstances wouldn’t mind his absence, Alexander felt guilty for leaving his new bride alone in the Manor on the cliffside. 

He had hurried back, managing to make it back a day before.

Recalling this, he set off towards the song, intuitively knowing that it was coming from the cliffside. Along the way, he found to his surprise that the treaded pathway he anticipated was missing. The route he was familiar with was covered by thick foliage. His steps faltered as the realisation crept up on him. 

This was a dream. 

Their first anniversary was over ten and a half years ago. 

This night, that was both familiar and blurry in his memories, had been the first glimpse he had into the person hidden beneath her persona of easygoing grace. Alexander had stopped walking at some point, but was drawn back to his surroundings when the singing disappeared. He forged ahead, feeling the forest give way in this dreamscape. Like it was encouraging him, the disjointed melody picked up again.

Before he knew it, he stepped into moonlight in the clearing by the edge of the cliff. The sound of distant waves crashing below could not muffle the discoherent song. He found her shadow where he expected it - slumped against a tree near the edge. As he made his way towards her, more things became obvious, such as the dark bottles littering the ground by her elbow, and the way her bare feet poked out the end of her dress, sprawled wantonly on the ground. 

Her head was tipped back, resting heavily against the tree trunk as she sang without care. Calling it a song was a bit of a stretch. It was closer to wailing. 

Alexander remained rooted to his spot for a while. It had been a long time since he had seen his wife so clearly anguished. Over the years, she had laughed, cried, and even displayed her considerable repertoire of curses in front of him. It was only her despair that remained carefully concealed. 

On her next breath, he walked towards her with heavy steps. Her eyes opened and stared at him, glimmering in the moonlight. They then narrowed into a squint. 

“Leo?” She asked. Before he could reply, she raised the corner of her lip in self-mocking. “Silly me, Leo’s dead.” 

She fell into silent contemplation for a while, then seemed to notice that Alexander was casting a shadow over her. Riza looked up at him confusedly. “Who are you again? We’ve met somewhere, haven’t we?”

“I’m your husband,” he heard himself say. 

Her look of confusion condensed into a blank stare. 

“Husband?” She repeated. Her head lolled to the side. “Do I have a husband?” She asked, more to herself. “When did I get married? Leo–” She stopped herself again. “Ah, but Leo’s gone.”

Alexander watched with growing heartache as she huffed out a chuckle that did not match the pensive gaze she directed at the ground and pressed the flesh of her palms against her eyes while tipping her head back again. None of it stopped the flow of tears. 

Her voice was hoarse from restraint. “They’re all gone.”

He stood silently by her for a while, knowing that the way she was holding herself completely still was her attempt to reign in her emotions. 

“It’s supposed to get better with time.” She said suddenly. 

Alexander was silent, but it seemed like she was expecting a reply. “Has it not?”

“No. Yes. Maybe.” She sighed. “It isn’t better now.”

He didn’t know how to respond to that.

If this had happened now - if he could change things from all those years ago - Alexander would have immediately bundled her into his arms as he had countless times since then. But this was a dream. A recollection of a time he had nearly forgotten; when his wife had still been a stranger.

All he had done was wait until she showed signs of calming down, then reach a hand out and gently say, “Let’s go back. It’s getting late.”

Riza dropped her hands with a frown. Her cheeks were stained with tears, but the emotion had disappeared with the salty sea breeze. “But I’m not done yet.”

“Not done with what?” 

She blinked dazedly, apparently forgetting what she had been doing. Finally, she said, “Singing.”

“Do you like to sing?”

“Not particularly,” she said. “But they liked it when I sang.”

“Okay.” Alexander said, and sat down beside her. If she had been any less drunk, Riza likely would have asked him why he did that. As it were, she promptly forgot about the new member of her audience and resumed her earlier posture to sing comfortably. 

The tremor and tightness of her voice had faded - undoubtedly because the alcohol had fully taken effect. It unfortunately relaxed her vocal chords too much, causing the strange syllables to be out of tune. It sounded dull, like a mantra chant that weaved up and down without warning. Slowly, the incorrect lyrics turned into mumbles, and finally tapered off to a soft hum a minute before her head lolled forward in slumber. 

Alexander remembered feeling at a loss at that time. He had come back from a grueling expedition expecting to take his new wife out to dinner and to show her around the seaside city close to their Manor. He had heard from the butler that the Madam rarely left the Manor’s grounds - seemingly content to stay within its (admittedly, generous) confines.

He had stared at her profile, wondering for the first time if he had made a mistake - if this contractual marriage had been a can of worms thrust into his hands. No wonder. After all, it had all seemed too good to be true.

There was a cacophony in his mind, but his expression betrayed none of it as he stood, brushed himself off, and gingerly picked up his dead drunk spouse. Riza was not small by any stretch, but her shoulders were narrow and he was surprised to find that the young woman was heavier than he anticipated. 

He maneuvered his new load into as comfortable a position he could maintain, and began the arduous trek back to the manor. His long walk back was accompanied by Riza’s quiet breathing. He couldn’t help but glance down at her peaceful expression. If not for the twin streaks of dried tears on her face, there was no sign of the earlier outburst. 

Alexander’s arms tightened around his cargo. 

What he would give now to keep her in his arms. 

As he was lost in thought, a soft voice asked, “What are you thinking about?”

Alexander blinked, jolted away from the dark forest. His field of vision was filled with that face he had been missing. 

They lay on their sides facing each other, entwined so closely that they barely took up any space on the king-sized bed. His fingers had been working its way through her hair until he got distracted. 

A lazy, contented smile hung on her lips, and there was a particular look of indulgence in those dark eyes that she only ever focused on him. 

His Adam’s apple bobbed, and the hand on the back of her head exerted a light pressure. “I’ll tell you if you give me a kiss.”

Riza huffed out a laugh, and obliged willingly with a quick peck to his chin. 

“Cheeky.” His hand snaked down to the back of her neck, urging her forward while his gaze dropped to her lips. “I meant a proper one.”

She laughed again, and stretched forward. 

Alexander’s eyelids slid shut in anticipation and a cold breeze made his eyelashes flutter. He blinked to find himself on the precipice of that cliffside, facing out to sea. 

A hissing sound drowned out the wind and he looked down in bewilderment to find that his hands which had been carrying precious cargo now only had golden sand sifting through. 

Without a second thought, he lunged forward, desperately trying to stop the shifting winds from taking her away. 

That one step sent him over the edge.