A Ranker’s Guide to the Good Life
Chapter 5

The one thing Jio hated hearing more than anything was the question, “Why are you so short for your age?” It pissed her off to no end. She drank far more milk than anyone she knew, and she slept for so many hours that logs were compared to her.

But I just don’t grow!

She felt so wronged that she had even taken the issue up with her mother once.

“What’s the deal with my growth glands, Mom?”

“Well... Your dad was on the shorter side too.”

“Then why are Jirok and Geumhee so tall, huh?”

“Thankfully, they take after me.”

She couldn’t even remember what her father looked like, but at that moment, she resented him slightly. In any case, Jio’s slight frame had inflicted her with the curse of getting stopped on the street more times than she could remember.

Thanks to that, she had mastered the skill of resting b*tch face. She was so good that she was practically an expert at scaring off religious cult recruiters.

“Can you please help me?” a voice asked from behind her.

“He helps those who help themselves or whatever, right?”

Ugh! Just slink back to whatever cult you’re from. I’m not interested in taking an MBTI test either. I already know mine. I may look like a cinnamon roll, but I can kill you. I should get myself a nun’s habit or something. Maybe then all these people will quit pestering me.

Jio sucked her teeth, then flinched once she turned around.

Whoa, he’s way too good-looking to be a cult recruiter… Not to mention, he looks so innocent. That determined gaze makes him seem like the main character of an action manga!

As she continued to slowly look him up and down, it suddenly dawned on her who he was. She had failed to recognize him at first since the medics had wiped all the dust and debris off, but she had no doubt it was him: The F-tier who had rescued the small child. The new hero of Seolleung Station, or... whatever the crowd had started calling him.

I’ve got a bad feeling about this… Something tells me this guy’s about to rope me into some annoying situation before I even get a word in.

“A manticore is about to come out here,” he blurted.

Called it...

Then with a more desperate look, he added, “The gate can’t close like this. I’m being serious. I know I probably sound like I have a screw or two loose, and I can’t really explain how I know, but you... Please believe me!”

Jio just stared at him.

“You have to believe me,” he said with more conviction.

That same conviction filled his eyes, and Jio felt certain of something.

He’s delusional. This guy must really think he’s the hero in some modern-day fantasy novel. Oh, yeah... This guy fits the stereotype perfectly.

The young man was indeed both considerably handsome and ominous, which suggested he knew of things no one else did. Moreover, he was pushy. Thus, he was a prime example of the increasingly rare people who imagined they were living as main characters in their own novels.

I’ll bet my entire life savings that he spends his days nose deep in web novels.

Novels had muddied the waters of the hunter world. Every now and then someone would claim that they were either reincarnated, from the past, from the future, or some other variation of the overdone trope.

Despite their rarity, such fools weren’t hard to find. For example, the Sunbucks across the street from the main bureau building was always full of them. The very fact that the young hunter was an F-tier—in other words, the tier everyone considered next to worthless—who’d survived going into the gate made him that much more typical of someone suffering from main character syndrome.

How long has he been waiting for this day to come? How long must he have passed up opportunities to upgrade to a higher tier? You tenacious bastard. Man, cosplayers are getting more impressive by the day in this country.

Although she was silently impressed, Jio cut the young man off.

“What the hell are you talking about? Just leave me alone.”

What a weirdo.

She made sure to give him a scathing look for good measure—the sort she usually saved for the weirdos she’d see on the subway.

Pay attention, man. I have no clue why you’re talking to me, but it’s pissing me off.

[“Brazen” trait activated. Your acting skills have now improved slightly. While this trait is active, you are free from feeling any qualms from having a conscience!]

“A hunter shouldn’t bother a law-abiding citizen like me. There’s a pretty steep fine for pulling stunts like this. I could report you for... disrupting the peace or something! But since you’re basically a hero or whatever, I won’t. Anyway, I’m leaving.”

Adios, pal. That a girl, Jio. That was cool as hell.

But just as she was about to walk away feeling triumphant, the man added, “If you leave now, Gyena Kwon is going to die!”

Wait… What?!

She turned back and noticed the urgent look in his eyes.

“And not just her. Most of the people here will die as well.”

Jio didn’t say a word.

“All the hunters and civilians… They’ll get wiped out and this station will become another huge memorial site.”

In another life, Seolleung Memorial was the name of an enormous stone monument that had been erected in the heart of Seoul, the capital.

It was the only incident she ever spoke of with even a hint of regret.

Despite a certain young woman’s extreme distaste for public exposure, she had visited the monument in person in order to leave flowers for the dead. No one knew why she had done it back then, but in that moment he knew.

It was you! You were here that da—no, today!

He had already expected that it wouldn’t be easy to persuade her since the incident had occurred so suddenly and shocked everyone after it did. It also didn’t help that the number of casualties caused by gates was exceedingly low in Korea. He would’ve considered himself lucky if she hadn’t looked at him as if he had lost his mind.

But still…

The young man held on tightly to the mage’s arm.

“You know that manticores are class 3 monsters. Well, the one that’s about to show up is a mutant, so it’ll be almost as bad as a level 2 disaster.”

Jio still wouldn’t speak.

“You... You have a way to find out if I’m telling the truth, don’t you?”

No answer.

“Please.”

Although she could sense his urgency, Jio didn’t allow any emotion to show on her face as she said, “So you must know who I am.”

“I do,” he answered quickly.

“I know you’re Sorcerer King.”

The wind suddenly picked up to the point that the air began to vibrate. It was not the sort of gust that occurred when a gate was closing. Thus, she decided it best to just do a final check for her own peace of mind.

“After everything you said, I trust you also know how I prefer to do things.”

“Yes, I know,” he answered again as his pure eyes glistened.

Or maybe it would be more accurate to say his eyes are noble.

As if all sense of formality had just returned to him, the young man began to introduce himself while laughing nervously.

“Uh, ‘Jo’... My name is Dohyeon Baek.”

[Exclusive celestial skill “Librarification” activated.]

[Authorization confirmed: Jio Gyeon, True Avatar]

[Designating zone.]

[Proceed to document “Dohyeon Baek”?]

Sure.

The fluttering sound of countless pages sounded in her mind.

I don’t need to read all that.

She skipped the cumbersome sections, then used “Library - Magnifying Glass” to enhance the information she was looking for.

/ Type: Person (Automatic)

/ Date of creation: Read failure

/ Location: Archive ＞ User: Jio Gyeon > Library > General (Personnel Information Query)

· Name: Dohyeon Baek

· Age: 24

· Tier: F

· Ranking: Non-elite

· Personality: Brave, Virtuous protector

· Affiliation: Earth - Republic of Korea

· Sub-affiliations: None

· Celestial: ■■■■■ (Restricted)

· First title: Undetermined

· Unique title(s): Second Attempt, Time Traveler, Protagonist of Failed World

Huh? W-w-what did I just read? What’s the deal with his titles? He’s a... “protagonist”? So he’s the real deal?! He isn’t just some discount store cosplayer?

Despite doing her best to maintain her poker face, it was one of the rare instances when Jio felt genuinely taken aback. She had expected the young man to have some sort of prophecy trait at best, but…

These aren’t active traits that can just get turned on and off. They’re unique titles, for god’s sake! Not only that, one of them actually calls him the protagonist of “a failed world”?

“I see...”

“So now do you trust me? If so, please help me. I’m begging you. We’re losing time.”

“Haa... Fine. But I have one condition.”

“Of course! Whatever you want. I mean... Provided it’s something I can do,” Dohyeon said while nodding cautiously.

He still had a bit of grime on one cheek, but it hardly distracted from how handsome he was. For whatever reason, he reminded her of a gorgeous border collie with its ears perked as it listens to its owner’s commands.

She was so deeply moved by that thought that she answered in an equally solemn tone.

“After this, don’t ever come looking for me again.”

“Um... What?”

“If we just happen to bump into each other again, and you try to talk to me... I’ll kill you.”

A “protagonist”? No, a protagonist who traveled back in time? Ha! And on top of all that, he’s supposedly from some “failed” world? Hey, what the heck does that even mean? Actually, even if I don’t know what it means, something tells me I don’t wanna know!

The mere fact that such things were possible was already terrifying enough to her. More importantly, she didn’t want anything to do with the sh*tstorm of complications he was capable of bringing into her life.

I hate this. Man, I hate this so damn much.

She decided she would ask Dohyeon where he lived before they went their separate ways so she could ensure that she never set foot anywhere near him again.

* * *

[EXCLUSIVE NEWS] Spontaneous rift mutates from level 6 to level 4 at Seolleung Station. Destruction has been completely repaired—destroyed sidewalks and buildings restored to their original states.

- That had to be #1’s handiwork!

- Yup, was definitely #1

- Obviously!

- And people were actually saying the top ranker had died or something. As if!

- Who was the punk claiming to have seen them in that temple in Gangwon Province? I

nearly fell for that crap!

- Yeah that story was hella detailed. It’s scary how good some people are at lying…

- Nah, it definitely didn’t add up. I mean, who the hell writes a 70,000-word story about seeing a ranker? HA!

- Hey, I could write one if you paid me... No takers? 3_3 If I saw Sorcerer King in person, I could write an entire book about it on the spot!

- Why do all you Jo fanboys use that stupid emoji? Is it like a secret symbol or something?

- Don’t be mean... 3_3

- It just means our eyes are swollen and red from watching videos of Jo all night 3_3 Besides, it’s cute!

- Guys, heaven and hell exist. Let me give you my testimony. Heaven is where people can live forever with Jo, the angel God sent from heaven. Hell is where the nonbelievers are tormented eternally. Faith is the only way to be saved. Profess your faith in Jo, the Lord’s messenger, and be saved!

- That online preacher guy’s still kicking, huh?

- Haven’t you heard? Everyone calls him “Religious Rapstar” now because he talks so fast

- LMAO he thinks the most powerful mage in the world is a messenger from heaven? How does that even work?

- Jo wasn’t even mentioned in the article, but look at his fanboys going wild in the comments

- Dude, that was uncalled for…

- W? T? H? Then you tell us, who else but Jo could’ve erased an event like that from the timeline as if nothing at all happened?! This poor guy reeks of insecurities. I can smell you from here, man

- Seriously, “Anonymous,” you’re making us sick -_- if you have time to write crap like that in the comments, grab a pickaxe and head to a dungeon in Noryangjin or something!

- Question: Is there a magic skill that can do that sort of thing?

- You’re basically talking about a unique celestial ability, idiot

- Well, I’m a ranker and a mage, but I can’t do anything even remotely like that... Plus, it’d obviously come at an extremely heavy price. Even the #1 ranker hasn’t used it until now.

- That just proves it must have a severe penalty for using it.

- I have to commute to and from Seolleung Station, so I’d be hella grateful if that were true, ha!

“Huh?! What penalty?!”

Jirok turned the intranet window off because he found the notion of a penalty that absurd. As the saying went, “Like celestial, like avatar.” No one had any idea just how much the hopeless homebody’s celestial doted on and protected her.

If that ability had even the slightest sort of penalty, he wouldn’t have given it to her in the first place. The real reason his sister didn’t use that skill more often was due to her laziness—plain and simple. He had no idea why she had suddenly decided to get involved, but he was certain it hadn’t been a voluntary decision on her part. Something had to have gone wrong.

Jio Gyeon was the sort of person who would stay in bed even if World War III broke out. As long as the bombs stayed clear of their apartment, she wouldn’t budge.

I can’t believe someone like that... is my sister, he thought as he clicked his tongue and reached for his phone.

He adjusted the camera angle a few times in order to get the best result, then…

SNAP!

[Me: (Photo)]

[Me: (Photo)]

[Me: Don’t use that card anymore. The account’s been closed.]

[Me: By the way, Mother Dearest is on the phone in the living room.]

[Me: Sounds like she’s talking to someone from that Buddhist temple in Gangwon. I heard folks who stay there have to say 1,000 prayers every morning LOL]

[Me: Enjoy the outside world while you can, Sis]

* * *

Nooooo!

Jio was filled with despair.