I'm still chained up. It's been three days since Elif left me. I don't know which day she came to me, but I'm starting to worry. Maybe her father figured out the situation and did something to her?

Also, for the past three days, Melis has been bringing me meals constantly. I haven't seen Hasan since he beat me. Melis doesn't say a word. No insults or disdainful looks. It's more like she's wary of me. She can't look me in the eye. She just leaves the food and goes away.

Did what I said really scare them that much?

Of course, it did. People are cowardly creatures. Even though you're just a little kid, what you're capable of when you grow up frightens them.

Honestly, after what you've told me, I don't want to grow up. The person I'll become scares me too.

There's no need for you to be scared.

If you say so...

h̵̜̰̯̲̮̳͕̎̍̎a͇̪̣͒̄̃͂̕h̵̪̘̜̫ͦ̽à̶̖͓͕ͥͩ̊

Besides, there's a more important issue here.

What?

They're probably planning to get rid of you now. They have the power over you for now, but when you grow up, you'll be a threat to them.

They'll want to get rid of you as soon as possible. I think they already had the idea of getting rid of you from the beginning, but what you said to Hasan might have accelerated the process.

So, what happens now? What are we going to do?

We'll see what happens. Don't worry, just because I said they might have accelerated the process doesn't mean they'll come and kill you right away.

They might be in the planning stage.

After they kill you, where will they bury you without getting caught, or maybe they'll cut off all your limbs and bury them separately. Or they might just burn your body—

O-okay, Milaz. You've explained enough.

h̵̜̰̯̲̮̳͕̎̍̎a͇̪̣͒̄̃͂̕h̵̪̘̜̫ͦ̽à̶̖͓͕ͥͩ̊. Sorry, I got carried away.

Why hasn't Elif come yet?

..

The topic has come back to Elif again. What a pleasant conversation we were having.

Yes, of course, why not, such a pleasant conversation.

Maybe it's better if she doesn't come.

What do you mean?

If she comes, you'll be at risk of getting caught.

What if Melis or Hasan suddenly shows up while Elif is here?

...

Milaz, are you trying to confuse me?

I'm just thinking logically.

I don't know. I really don't know what to think.

All my thoughts are jumbled up.

Taşkın! Look over here!

I reflexively turned my head to where I was pointed. I was surprised myself. Milaz didn't have a physical body, so he couldn't point to a place for me.

But I felt as if someone was there beside me and had pointed to a place with their hand.

It was my friend, the mouse. He hadn't been around for a long time. He stood still, looking at me.

Taşkın, are you ready to kill a living creature for the first time in your life?

What!?

Kill the mouse. The piece of glass you cut yourself with is right here. There's dried blood on it. Take it and crush the mouse before it escapes.

Why?! It didn't harm me. Why should I kill it when there's no reason?

Did you harm Hasan and Melis? Did you do anything to them? No, you didn't!

They're keeping you here for their sick pleasures and tormenting you! There's no reason at all!

B-but I can't do th-this.

Also, didn't you want revenge!? You screamed at Hasan. You said you would kill them like this and that. Were those words empty? Did you just say them for the sake of saying them? Are you that cowardly and weak? Stop acting helpless and pathetic, Taşkın! Enough!

...

..

I'm not weak! I'll accomplish everything I told Hasan! I'll kill them all!

As I struggled to move my body, a sudden surge of power seemed to overcome me. I didn't understand what was happening. My heart started beating fast and hard. I could hear its pounding.

It was as if I wasn't myself. I grabbed the piece of glass I had just cut myself with and turned towards the mouse. I wasn't in control. The mouse looked at me, unmoving. With the piece of glass in my right hand, I swiftly swung towards the mouse. It attempted to escape but couldn't. I had cut the mouse in half. My hand was covered in blood. The force of my strike had shattered the wooden floor of the hut. I didn't know how I was capable of doing this.

h̵̜̰̯̲̮̳͕̎̍̎a͇̪̣͒̄̃͂̕h̵̪̘̜̫ͦ̽à̶̖͓͕ͥͩ̊. Yes, that's it, Taşkın.

Now eat it, Taşkın! Make me believe in you! Prove to me that you're not a pitiful, weak human!

What?... O-okay!

I picked up the back half of the mouse. I lifted it by its tail and brought it to my mouth. Its blood dripped onto my face and into my mouth.

Come on, Taşkın!

I brought the mouse to my mouth and after a few seconds, I shoved it into my mouth and bit down with all my might. The tail snapped off in my hand. I tossed it into my mouth afterward.

I started chewing. The mouse's blood overflowed from my mouth, trickling down my chin.

It's not that hard, is it?

How do you feel now?

I-I feel great! My hand and mouth are warm with the mouse's blood.

What a wonderful feeling!

h̵̜̰̯̲̮̳͕̎̍̎a͇̪̣͒̄̃͂̕h̵̪̘̜̫ͦ̽à̶̖͓͕ͥͩ̊. Yes, indeed.

How does it feel to kill a defenseless creature weaker than you?

Wonderful! It feels so wonderful!

I'll become stronger! I'll become the strongest!

h̵̜̰̯̲̮̳͕̎̍̎a͇̪̣͒̄̃͂̕h̵̪̘̜̫ͦ̽à̶̖͓͕ͥͩ̊. That's it, Taşkın! This is you! This is your true self!

I snapped back to reality with the creak of the door.

Elif was looking at me with fearful eyes.

I looked at my hand, then back at Elif. I repeated this two or three times. It was as if I wasn't myself, and I had no idea what to say in response.

I spat out the mouse, startled. It was as if someone else had been controlling me just now, but now I was back in control.

I immediately threw the glass shard from my hand.

"E-Elif, l-look. I-I didn't do this willingly. It's like there's someone in my head. It's talking to me! It's leading me astray! Please, Elif! I can't bear to see you look at me like that. Don't look at me with fearful eyes! Look at me with the same loving gaze you always have, please!"

Taşkın said this while hitting his head with his right hand. Then he knelt and began to hit his head against the floor. His forehead was bleeding. He cried with sobs.

"I-I really d-didn't do it on purpose, Elif."

Elif finally overcame her shock and began to speak;

"O-okay, Taşkın. Calm down. I'm here. I-I know."

"You don't know anything!"

Just shut up! Shut up!

Taşkın always talked to Milaz inside his head, in his mind. But this time, he had expressed his anger outwardly.

Elif stopped talking.

"N-no, Elif, I didn't mean you. It's constantly talking in my head. It's bothering me!"

"O-okay, Taşkın. I understand. Just calm down. You would never do such a thing willingly. Y-you've gone through so much, things no one should ever have to experience. But it will all pass. Believe me."

There's nothing to pass. Everything's just beginning.

Enough!!

Elif quickly came to Taşkın's side and hugged him. Taşkın's broken left arm swayed numbly. Blood trickled down his forehead from hitting it against the floor. The mouse he had cut in half dripped blood onto the wooden floor. But he had calmed down. He leaned his head towards Elif and took a deep breath. Then he completely surrendered himself. He was so weak, like a child due to malnutrition, that Elif easily held him and took him to the wall.

Minutes passed, and Taşkın opened his eyes. Elif looked at him with worried eyes, wiping the blood from his face with a wet tissue.

"E-Elif?"

"Yes, Taşkın, I'm here. I'm by your side, there's no need to worry. You've been unconscious for a few minutes. The lights in the house came on while you were like this, I hid somewhere and waited for a while, but no one came. Then I saw the lights went off. I think we're safe. I was so scared because I heard noises for a moment."

"Elif, I-I really didn't do it willingly."

"I know, Taşkın, I know. You've been through such difficult things, and you're still going through them. I don't want to say the same things again, but this will all end someday. We just have to endure."

I wanted to reply, but nothing came to mind. I just stayed silent.

Elif didn't speak for a while either.

Later, Elif reached back to take off her backpack and started talking.

"Look, Taşkın, I brought you a book. You can read these and learn a lot of things."

She handed me the book.

The cover had smiling children holding balloons. There was some writing on it, but I couldn't understand it.

"E-Elif, I can't read this."

"What do you mean? Don't you know how to read and write?"

I shook my head.

When Elif asked Taşkın this question, she thought she had made a mistake and hurt Taşkın's feelings. She thought he knew how to read and write.

"I'm sorry, Taşkın. I thought you knew how to read and write."

"N-no, there's no need to apologize. I wasn't upset."

"If you want, I can teach you how to read and write."

No, we don't want that.

Shut up, Milaz.

"Sure. I'd love to."

She took the book from my hand and took out a smaller, thinner book from her bag.

"I'm in third grade right now. I'll bring you the reading and writing books they give in the first grade next time, but I don't have them with me right now. So, I'll teach you by writing in this notebook."

It wasn't a book she took out, but a notebook.

After taking out the pen and eraser from her bag, Elif came to me. She leaned against the wooden wall of the hut and put the notebook on her lap.

I watched her carefully. Her hair brushed against my shoulder, and it smelled really nice. I had smelled a similar scent when I was forcibly bathed at home before.