They were sitting on a high wall of a building that had burned down not long ago. There was still a smoky smell lingering. Nish didn’t know why Experium hadn’t cleared away the remains yet. It gave the place a morbid atmosphere, which somehow suited the school.

Nish rolled his eyes. "Listen to who's talking. I'm surprised you haven't bought a collar for Fox yet."

"You think I haven’t? He proudly wears it on the right occasions."

A lump formed in Nish’s throat.

"But seriously..." Kris’s expression changed, becoming serious. "He's only fifteen. Don’t you think he's a bit too young?"

Nish scoffed. "Your plaything looks like he's twelve. A mentally dera–"

Before he could finish his sentence, Kris grabbed him by the hair and yanked his head back with so much force that something cracked. Nish screamed in shock. 

Kris's eyes were pitch black. "Don't talk about him like that, or I’ll break your fucking neck."

A shiver ran down his spine. Yet, being so close to Kris made Nish breathe faster. He could feel Kris’s breath on his lips. Was he doing this on purpose? As he stared into those stormy eyes, his chest heaving, Nish felt the tightness in his pants. He wanted Kris’s hand to slide down there again and feel his fingers around him. It had been so long, but he could still see it clearly in his mind, could summon every sensation. His gaze lingered on Kris's lips, on the small silver ball underneath them.

Jealousy twisted inside him at the thought that Fox could feel that cold piece of metal all over his body daily.

His lips tingled; he longed to press them against Kris's, to pick up where they’d abruptly left off two and a half years ago... But when he looked back into Kris’s eyes, there was no sparkle. His eyes were cold, no longer warm, no longer filled with excited tension.

He looked away and took a deep breath. "Sorry," he mumbled, though he didn’t mean a word of it. But it was stupid—he knew better than to mention Fox. They’d fought about it many times, but those comments slipped out sometimes.

Kris sighed. "Do you like him?" he eventually asked.

Yrla? Nish shrugged. He liked him well enough, yeah. But not... He suppressed a sigh. Not as much as you. "I think so," he eventually said. He might not be in love, but it was the first time since Kris that he felt something. Something beyond physical desire, since Yrla hadn’t shown much interest in him yet. Still, the boy didn’t bore him. "Maybe he’s young, yeah. But he’s mature for his age. He’s more than just a rookie who just earned his name."

Kris gave him a thoughtful look, then shrugged and pulled a pack of cigarettes from his pocket. "Well–go for it, I’d say." He smirked. "At least someone can't wait to double date."

Double date. Unless he could dump Fox in a hole and cover it up, Nish didn’t see that happening. And the idea that his friend was encouraging him to make a move with Yrla, was even more annoying than when he was nagging about his age.

"As long as your poodle doesn’t organize the date," Nish muttered.

Kris chuckled, taking a drag from his cigarette. "Oh, you have no idea what you’re missing, man."

Nope. And he wanted to keep it that way.

Some nights, you just wished they would never end. This was one of those nights. It felt like the old days, like his first year when no one had come between him and Kris. Fox had stayed home sick today, and luckily Kris had come to the party anyway. Since Nish had felt so excluded whenever Kris and Fox were together, he made sure to involve Kris in everything, and Yrla didn’t seem to mind. The boy had caught his attention a few weeks ago, and since then, they’d hung out a few times.

They played several drinking games until they were all pretty tipsy. After a round of Truth or Dare, Kris sent Yrla off to ask for three numbers from attractive fellow students, and Nish followed him with his eyes from a distance.

"We used to do this every week," Nish said as they both downed a shot. He searched his friend's eyes, looking for the same desire from back then. No longer completely steady, he leaned against Kris. Warm bubbles rose from his belly when Kris wrapped an arm around him to keep him upright. "See? Parties are fun without Fox too. Just–you and me." He put an arm around Kris as well and took a tense breath. "I want to kiss."

Kris chuckled. "I’d go for it. He’s been a bit tense around you. He doesn’t act as awkward as Fox used to, but he’s definitely not at ease, and it’s clear he likes you."

It took Nish a few seconds to realize his friend was talking about Yrla. Not about himself. His jaw tightened a little. Would it really mean nothing to Kris if he kissed someone else? Maybe the memories would come flooding back, maybe he’d get jealous, maybe he’d finally realize that Nish stirred something in him too. There was no way all those feelings were completely gone!

When Yrla returned, he waved his iNet in the air. "Got them!" He nudged Nish’s arm. "Learned from the best," he said with a grin.

"Did you only ask girls?" Kris teased. "Someone here might be pretty disappointed." He winked at Yrla.

The question seemed to embarrass Yrla a bit, and he looked at them somewhat awkwardly. He cleared his throat. "Well, uh, the three most attractive guys are already here, right? And since I already have Nish's number, I know my own by heart, and asking for yours would be cheating, I didn’t ask." He grinned broadly at them. "But you’re welcome to put your number in my iNet, Kris." He winked at him. "Okay Nish, your turn. Truth or dare."

"Hmm, dare for me. You know you can always ask me anything."

Yrla glanced at Nish and then began to grin. "For the next five minutes, act like Kris’s pet."

"W-what?" Nish stammered.

Kris tightened his grip around him, leaned in close, and whispered, "I could get Fox’s collar for you?" He chuckled and kissed him playfully on the cheek.

Nish felt the heat rise to his cheeks. He never felt insecure, but now he didn’t know what to say or do, and his legs felt like jelly. His body burned, and he looked at his friend. That kiss – it meant something, right? Or was that part of the so-called game? Confused, he looked at Yrla. "What am I supposed to do then?"

"How should I know?" Yrla grinned and crossed his arms.

Kris chuckled. "If you give the boy what he wants, you’ll probably get a nice reward from him," he whispered before patting him on the shoulder. "Come on, Rover!" He grabbed a snack from a nearby bowl and tossed it across the room. "Fetch the ball!"

"Why so far?" Nish grumbled.

Kris burst out laughing. "They think you’re drunk off your ass, stop whining." He gave him a shove.

Nish growled and then half-hopped and barked his way across the room.

Kris was laughing so hard he had tears in his eyes and looked at Yrla. "I like you. I hope you stick around."

Yrla grinned and ran his hand through Nish’s hair as he returned. "Good boy," he said, laughing.

"Watch out, this dog bites." Nish growled playfully and winked at Yrla. Now that the worst was over, he could laugh about it and felt satisfied that he hadn’t chickened out. "Well, I can't let this slide. Are you up for a dare too?" He looked at Yrla challengingly.

Yrla laughed and raised his hands. "You want revenge, huh? Bring it on, I’ll do any dare you give me."

Nish grinned. "Just what I wanted to hear. Alright, daredevil. Kiss me. A real kiss."

Yrla’s grin froze on his face. He looked at Nish with wide eyes. Then at Kris, who was smirking.

Clearly nervous, he looked back at Nish. Then he closed his eyes and took a deep breath before pressing his lips against Nish's.

Holy hell, he did it! Yrla’s lips touched his, and Nish explored them with his own. In the background, he heard Kris whistle. Nish placed a hand on Yrla’s neck to prevent him from pulling away and kissed him again until Yrla hesitantly opened his mouth and Nish slid his tongue inside. Though he had intended to make Kris jealous, he momentarily forgot about him and indulged in the kiss he’d been looking forward to for weeks. Yrla tasted like alcohol and a trace of the cigarettes they’d smoked earlier. And despite it being his first kiss, Yrla seemed to pick it up fairly naturally.

Nish let his thumb glide along Yrla's jawline before pulling his hand away. Yrla was slightly out of breath–it had lasted longer than Nish had expected. Grinning, Nish looked down at the boy. "Not bad for a rookie."

Yrla blushed briefly, then grinned. "Thanks." Still, he seemed to feel a bit uncomfortable. "Uhh, can we go outside for a moment?" he asked Nish. "It's pretty warm in here."

"Yeah, sure. I'll grab another beer." He exchanged a glance with Kris, who gave him a meaningful look.

It stung, felt bitter.

But it had just been a dare.

If he really kissed Yrla later because he wanted to, it might hurt Kris. However, he understood that Kris wanted to give them some space, because he made a lame excuse that he needed to talk to someone, and so Nish walked outside with Yrla, handing him a beer.

Yrla seemed a bit more distant. Should he not have done that dare? But the boy had barely hesitated, and Nish hadn’t felt like he didn’t want it. Should he say something about it? Or would that just make the problem bigger than it was? In the end, he quietly drank his beer next to Yrla, but not so close that it would feel suffocating for him.

"Do you want to go home?" he asked after a while.

Yrla snapped out of his thoughts. "Oh no, of course not. Sorry." He smiled apologetically at Nish. "I just didn't know what to talk about."

The answer was an immense relief, and Nish smiled back. "That's alright, of course. We've already talked a lot tonight. Just let me know when you want to go back inside, then maybe we can dance for a bit?" he suggested.

"Sounds good," he said with a grin. "Right now, I have better dance moves than you anyway, so I get why you're afraid to go alone." He playfully nudged Nish’s arm.

"Hey, if I can't steal the show myself anymore, I have to use someone else for that, right?" Delighted, he stood up, happy that the boy was getting back to his old self. Maybe he was just overthinking it, and Yrla had simply been a bit tired. They walked back inside. It was already much quieter, the evening was coming to an end. Here and there, couples were kissing or touching each other. It increased his desire, and he looked around for Kris. He was standing at the bar, talking to someone, and looked more sober than Nish would have liked. If he were also tipsy, maybe he would kiss him back and forget about his stupid boyfriend. Luckily, he still had Yrla. That kiss earlier had been pretty good, and he longed for more.

With a grin, he pulled Yrla with him onto the dance floor.

He wasn’t exactly sure how, but at some point, they ended up in a dark corner, Yrla with his back against the wall. Nish stared into Yrla’s eyes, feeling a powerful desire coursing through his veins. He gently brushed his fingers along the side of Yrla’s face.

"You’re fucking handsome, you know that?" His voice was hoarse.

His thoughts oscillated between the blond boy, who was indeed handsome, and his best friend, whom he had wanted since the day he came to this school. He could feel Kris’s gaze boring into his back.

He had encouraged him – but would it really not bother him if he kissed Yrla? Would he pull him away from the boy, pin him against the wall, and kiss him like he had never kissed Fox?

The fantasy set him on fire.

He moved his hand to Yrla’s face, tilted his chin slightly, and pressed his lips to his. What started as a tender kiss quickly turned into a passionate one that surpassed the earlier kiss tenfold. With fiery eyes, he looked at Yrla, hungry for more. It had been a long time since a desire like this had surged through him while feeling a warm body against his. He lowered his head, beginning to kiss the boy’s neck.

Yrla inhaled sharply. "Nish..." he said softly. "Nish, don’t."

Nish looked up when Yrla started to protest. He sounded hesitant, tense, and maybe a little confused. But not like he didn’t want it. He had no experience, he was likely afraid of the unknown. "Relax," he whispered. "I won’t do anything you won’t enjoy."