Ash’s leg bounced uncontrollably under the desk, the music in his headphones blaring so loudly he could hardly hear himself think. He considered that a good thing, given all the memories that had swirled in his mind when Coby inadvertently reminded him of why he was back home in the first place. He’d tried not to think of it, to keep the thoughts from taking control and fueling his anger and bitterness at Scott’s betrayal. Spending time with Coby had helped with that, and Ash hadn’t realized how much until Coby asked, innocently enough, why Coby had moved back in with his family.

The very last thing Ash wanted to do was dwell on his ex while the guy he liked now was right across the hall, sharing his home, sitting at his table, smiling and laughing with him. He wanted to forget all about Scott Tulle and every last thing they’d done together. He wanted to forget the past year, not just the one day that blew apart his entire world and showed him just what an awful person Scott really was.

He’d been so blinded in his love for the angel, he’d missed so many signs. It hadn’t helped that in those last few months together he’d spent more time on his studies and helping Rhett out at the bar than he had with Scott, but that was still no excuse for what his ex had done. Even Colin said as much whenever Ash would try and blame himself for Scott’s decisions. 

“The guy is a self-centered prick, Ash,” he’d said during one intense text conversation. “He gets all jealous and possessive of you but gets upset when you catch him flirting with some other guy? How is that okay? You’re better off without him, dude.”

Maybe, but that didn’t make the sting of the betrayal hurt any less. 

Out of habit, he picked up his phone and scrolled through the endless unanswered texts Scott had sent him before Ash finally blocked his number. The empty promises, the fake apologies, the gaslighting, all of it…Ash had once fallen for each and every word, only to end up getting hurt again. He’d put so much trust and faith in the angel, only to get burned one too many times, the last time being the worst.

He still had no regrets for the things he’d said and done, and he didn’t care to accept the other guy’s apology when he came up to Ash a few days afterwards. He tried to say he didn’t know Scott was in a relationship, that it was a one-time thing, that it didn’t mean anything, blah blah blah. Ash just glared at him, saying nothing, until the little shit walked away, shaking with fear. 

All Scott had done was blow up Ash’s phone. Apparently he knew Ash wasn’t bluffing when he’d made his threats. Or he was too chickenshit to find out. Either way, outside of class and study hall, Ash never saw Scott again after he threw him out of the apartment, naked and begging for Ash’s forgiveness. Forgiveness he would never earn. Forgiveness he didn’t deserve.

Ash had buried himself so deep into his studies, locked himself so completely away in his room, Abel was certain he was going to drive himself into a depression so deep, he’d never come back out. He blew up Ash’s phone so often, the boy finally lost it and blocked his number. Even though he had started to come out more before Coby showed up, he was still distant, still closed off.

Ash had wanted nothing to do with the world after what Scott had done. 

And then a gravely injured merman showed up in Marina Bay, and everything he believed about himself was thrown out the window. 

Ash pulled the headphones off and set them on the desk, the music still audible from the speakers as he stood up and walked to the window, leaning against it to gaze out over the front and side parts of the property. 

How much did he truly love Scott if he was willing to leave so easily? If he was ready to give his heart away to someone new only a month or so after being destroyed emotionally and mentally? Scott had been absolutely everything to Ash for so long, he didn’t know if he would ever be able to live without him.

Coby was proving every moment they spent together that he could, and that he could do it better than he had when he and Scott were still together. Ash had never skipped class for Scott. He’d never done an overnight stay with him in a medical facility. He’d never sworn to kick the ass of someone who was bigger than himself in order to protect Scott.

He did all this for Coby, and he was willing to go even further, no questions asked. He felt so completely drawn to the beautiful young mythic, so connected in ways he still couldn’t explain no matter how hard he tried. He felt more alive when he was near Coby, stable and safe. He had begun to live for every smile, every laugh, every covered touch that he wished could be more. In just two weeks, Co-Bieasah was becoming more to him than he thought possible.

And he’d just slammed the door in his face and shut him out the moment he was reminded of how he got to this point.

He rested his forehead against the glass and sighed deeply. Scott had forced him here, there was no question about that. But he had to admit that if he wasn’t home with his family, he wouldn’t have met Coby. If Ash and Scott had still been together when Lynn had sent that text about the merman going crazy in the hospital, Scott would have told him to ignore it and let someone else handle it. Life would have been very different for both the human and the merman if Ash hadn’t caught Scott banging some rando in their apartment.

What bothered him the most, however, was how he had let his bitterness over Scott affect how he treated Coby. He had been so cold, shutting him out immediately after telling the merman he would be there for him if Coby needed anything. If Coby didn’t feel like he had done something wrong, Ash would be surprised. 

He ran a hand through his thick dark hair and stared up at the sky beyond his window. Coby had to be out there now, probably meditating deeper than he had when the two had been standing out there together earlier. He’d asked to be alone to do so, and Ash would respect his wishes, even if all he wanted right now was to be with him.

He needed to apologize, to explain himself in some way, to reassure Coby that it wasn’t him he’d been angry at, that it wasn’t his fault. He also needed to make up for hurting him, as he was sure he had. The boy hadn’t been here half a day and already Ash was making him feel unwelcome.

“Good going, asshole,” Ash muttered to himself. “If you were hoping to make him like you more, you went about it the absolute wrong fucking way.”

He shook his head, pushing himself from the window and headed to his door, scooping up his phone as he went. He was checking his messages when he opened the door, nearly colliding full-on with Coby, the merman’s fist raised to knock.

Ash took a step back in surprise, dropping his phone. “Shit, Coby, you scared me,” he breathed, clutching at his chest, his heart pounding.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bother you, I…” Coby was saying at the same time. 

The two went silent, staring at one another awkwardly, neither knowing what to say, both feeling guilt for hurting the other, even if only one of them actually had.

“I’m sorry,” Coby said at last, his words coming out rushed. 

Ash blinked. “What?”

“I upset you earlier when I encouraged your visit with your brother, and then for asking so many questions when you obviously didn’t want to discuss him or why you came back home. It wasn’t my place to do any of it and I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you angry, Ash, I just…”

“Coby, I wasn’t mad at you.”

Coby’s eyebrow ticked. “You weren’t?”

“No,” Ash said, shaking his head. “I mean, yeah, I was angry, but it had nothing to do with you or Rhett.”

Coby shifted his weight to his good leg. “What was it about?”

Ash sighed, moving back into the room to drop onto his bed. “Before you got here, a lot of shit went down that forced me to move back home,” he said. “I hadn’t really been dwelling on it a whole lot since we met and when you asked why I was here, it just came back like a tidal wave.” He looked up at Coby, remorse painting his dark green eyes. “I hurt you and made you feel guilty for no reason, and I’m sorry.”

Coby’s lips twitched and he reached for his long braid, toying with the beads. “You were pretty cold,” he said softly, his gaze averted.

“I know,” Ash admitted. He reached out a hand. “Come here.”

Coby went to him, moving easily into his arms, his hands on Ash’s shoulders as the other wrapped his arms around his middle, resting his head against Coby’s stomach. Without thinking about it, Coby moved one arm loosely around Ash’s neck while he played with Ash’s hair, a habit that helped Coby when he felt anxious or upset.

They remained that way for several moments, comfortable in their silence, calming the other with their presence alone. It was Coby who finally spoke, his soft voice a balm on Ash’s soul.

“I spent time out on the cliff,” he said. “I sent my prayers for the ones I lost, the lives I took, and the ones who’ve come into mine. I also sought guidance.”

“For what?” Ash asked, his voice muffled by Coby’s stomach.

“A few things,” Coby said vaguely. “One of which had to do with you.”

Ash tensed. “Should I be worried?”

“No,” Coby chuckled softly, tugging on a lock of Ash’s hair, making the other smile. “I had pushed you away and I wanted to know how to bring you back.”

Ash slowly turned his head, looking up into the most beautiful blue eyes he’d ever seen. “You didn’t.”

“Ash…”

“Baby, I mean it, you didn’t do anything wrong. Not one damn thing. If anything, I was the one that shut you out. I was an asshole and you didn’t deserve that. You just got here, and I made the absolute worst impression on you and I can’t forgive myself for it.”

Coby gazed into his eyes, warm and accepting. “You hid from me,” he said.

“I did,” Ash acknowledged, lowering his face into Coby’s stomach. “I let my bullshit take over and I ran. You didn’t push me away, Coby…you could never do that.”

Coby’s fingers stilled in his hair, his palm flexing and curling against his scalp slowly, but he said nothing. That alone made Ash nervous.

“Coby?”

Coby didn’t respond. Ash released his hold, pulling away enough to search Coby’s face, his hands on Coby’s hips. Coby was looking off toward the window, his gaze distant, his eyes flickering as though he were searching for an answer he couldn’t find.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Coby said, “What if I had to?”

Ash’s grip tightened slightly and he pulled Coby closer. Coby’s gaze fell to his face, Ash’s green eyes hard with determination. 

“Then I’ll just run right back to you, Co-Bieasah.”

Coby’s eyes twitched. “You what?”

“I’m not sure if you’ve noticed or not, but I like you, Coby. A great fucking deal.”

Coby’s heart slammed against his ribcage. Of course he knew that. That’s what made every choice he made in regards to Ash so damn difficult.

“It’s obvious to me there’s something you’re hiding, and I’m sure you have your reasons for it,” Ash said. “I won’t push you about it, and I won’t force you to tell me if you don’t want to. But whatever it is, I’m staying right by your side.”

Coby gulped. “Ash…”

Ash grabbed Coby behind his thighs and lifted, dropping him onto his lap. Coby gripped tight to Ash’s neck, startled by the sudden shift in Ash’s demeanor. Ash’s gaze was hot on his face, searing as it tore through his clothes and flesh, exposing his soul in all its raw vulnerability. 

“Tell me the truth, Co-Bieasah,” Ash demanded in a low rumble. “Do you really want to push me away? Or do you feel like you have to because of the secrets you’re keeping?”

Coby couldn’t speak, each excuse he found looking more pitiful than the last. He settled for his only option: the absolute truth.

“I have to,” he whispered. “To keep you safe.”

Ash’s grip on his thighs tightened, pulling him closer in. Coby gasped, a small, involuntary noise he’d never made before escaping his throat. He felt his back arch slightly as he curved into Ash’s body, his arousal straining in his pants.

Ash’s hands slid up his back, under his hoodie but over his tee shirt, leaving a trail of heat Coby couldn’t put out.

“You’ll fail.”

Coby’s breathing was shallow, his mind spinning, his body completely on fire under Ash’s touch.

“At what? Keeping you safe?”

“No.” Ash stood quickly, flipping Coby onto his back on the bed. He pinned Coby’s arms above his head, his thigh pressed between his legs as he hovered over him. Coby didn’t resist, he didn’t want to. His eyes glazed over as his body trembled, his desire overriding every other thought and sense. Ash leaned closer, his lips right at Coby’s ear. 

“At pushing me away.”

Coby’s lips turned up in a coy grin. He lifted his hips slightly, pressing back against Ash’s own hardness. 

“God, I hope so.”

**