Once lost, Now found

Chapter seven

Cas

I woke earlier this morning so I could leave and take stock of the town I once grew up in. It's changed so much in such a short time. The town's centre covered a small area which was open and friendly, but a short walk down any of the numerous side streets took the unwary, unsuspecting rambler into a sudden and startling maze of streets. And what streets! Even in the daylight they were dark, claustrophobic, narrow and faintly sinister. At night it could easily have been taken for a landscape created by a modern Bosch, or one of the regions through which Virgil guided Dante. The poor lighting made it even more grotesque and disturbing. 

Crumbling public houses struggled to make ends meet from their limited catchment of locals. Shops were converted into dubious coffee bars and even a high end club had been opened up down the central part of town. Probably against most of the old folks' morals, it stood there like a beacon for all the young college and uni goers. It has become a strange but surreal place. I found no comfort, not anymore. But walking down the street I once knew, the people I used to greet, I came across the old bakery. It had been plastered with graffiti over the years, one that's going to cost me a pretty penny, a nice dent in my savings. I sold most of my belongings, even my car. But looking at the old place brought a subtle but sweet smile to my face, I could see it. Working there, making business good again with my own unique taste, hell, I could even expand it into more than just a bakery. It had a lot of potential. But do I really want to take that risk? I've lost so much, so much of myself, I'm not even sure what I have left anymore. It's hard….really hard trying to forget that empty feeling when it consumes you. 

"Oh my god!" I jump in surprise when a high pitched voice resounded from behind me. I turn to see a young woman. Holding her hand over her mouth. I know that face. "Cas, right?" She blurted.

"Erm, yeah." She let out a sigh of relief and took my hand. I was shocked, briefly and snatched it away. 

"I'm sorry." She softly said. "It's just been so long….it's me, Lacey." Lacey? Oh, right. I remember her. From high school. Popular girl. Went with the crowd, but you knew she didn't want to. Most of them didn't want to, but then again highschool life can be harsh, so you do whatever you can to make it easier on yourself, right?

"Yeah, I remember."

"Let's go for a coffee."

"Maybe another time….sorry." She looked saddened, and I felt sorry for her. "Fine."

"Yes, I know a good little spot." She said taking the lead. I felt compelled to follow her, although I didn't want to. "It's just up here." We came up to a quaint little coffee shop, not very big in size, but the line was long. "Sit, I'll get them. What do you want?" She gleamed.

"Just a plain coffee, no sugar." She nodded and I found a seat in the far corner. I watched the que die down. I watched everyone. I didn't recognize any other. Maybe they all left town. I don't blame them, not one bit. It's always been one of those tight knit communities. The kids at school would always wish to be adults quicker so they could leave and see bigger, better things.

"Here, your drink." She said, placing the hot coffee in front of me. "So, how have you been, it's been a long time huh?"

"I guess it has."

"I heard about your grandmother, I'm sorry for your loss."

"It's fine, don't fret over it." She lent her chin on her palm. Now looking at her, she still looks the same, just with added age. "Thanks for the coffee."

"You're welcome. So, are you staying in a hotel or your grandmother's place?"

"She left me the house and bakery."

"Really, will you re-open the bakery?"

 "I….don't know." So many questions, I feel like I've been put on a pedal stall, it's uncomfortable. 

"So you are living in the house, alone?" 

"No, I….kind of have a roommate." She smiled then took a sip of her drink. "He's doing up the garden for me."

"He? How did you meet him?" I was going from being uncomfortable to agitated.

"Look, Lacey. Thanks for the coffee, but I really am quite busy." I wanted to run and keep on running until I'm back home. I only wanted one person's company. He didn't bombarded me with questions, he let me be silent, he let me breathe.

"I apologise, I didn't mean to…." I cut in pushing my coffee away from me, I wasn't in the mood.

"It's fine, I must leave."

"Oh, right. Maybe another time then?" She asked and looked at my untouched coffee.

"Maybe." I got up and took my leave, I left her sitting there. I felt guilty, but I just couldn't do it. I don't think I can do anything but disappear in my own self pity. I realised now, I'm just not ready for the world yet. 

I left going back to the bakery for another time and headed home. The back streets to my grandmothers was still the same, although the town wasn't. I felt a little calmer now climbing the many steps to my home and as I got to my front door I saw Luca, he smiled a warm gentle smile and for the first time ever, I didn't hesitate, because, maybe, he was warming up to me. Still a stranger, but a stranger I wanted to know more about.