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Elias pushed the remote aside and held his head up by the forehead, forcing his bangs back. The TV screen showed one of the news reporters on the field again, where quite a few people in surgery attire were running around behind him. He appeared to be standing in front of what Elias assumed to be an emergency operation set up, and he could make out a woman being wheeled out from one of the white tents on a stretcher. Elias wondered if this catastrophe was why the business had suddenly slowed. In fact, he hadn’t seen a single customer since he was forced awake.

“What happened to Sherry?” Adino said. Elias turned his head to look at his best friend and saw him squint.

“Dunno,” he said, “never seen this guy before.”

When Elias looked back at the TV, the male reporter known as Robert answered Adino’s question when he pointed to Sherry herself behind him, waiting in a wheelchair with a bloated belly.

“You have got to be kidding me,” Adino slowly exhaled. “Please don’t tell me we’re all pregnant…”

Another kick came from within Elias’ stomach right after Adino said as thus, and Elias doubted he’d only “gained several pounds” during his nap. Evidently, he must’ve grown several organs to-boot!

Robert had footage played back from just after ten in the morning, where the kooky doctor introduced himself as “Boom Boom” from the building screens to whoever stopped to watch in the downtown area. The footage seemed to have come from a civilian’s device, however, because the screen was limited to a vertical take. The zoomed-in quality was also fuzzy and the screen shook far too often. From what Elias could tell, the one taking the video was across the main street, filming from either the sidewalk, or outside some business (like the outside seating area of a bar). There was some traffic in-between, but the camera zoomed in enough that only the tops of some cars could be seen occasionally.

“I’m going to start a baby boom, just because I can!” the old man said, hands thrown in the air. “And because there’s a shortage of heroes, I’ve carefully collected DNA samples from every male hero, villain, and yes, even the vigilantes hiding in the shadows, and I’m going to use it to impregnate several random citizens with each one’s offspring. Doesn’t that sound grand?”

“What the hell is he going on about?” Elias could hear a man ask. He was likely the one who filmed the initial video and had either sent it to the news station, or posted it online and received enough engagement for the news station to find it.

Wherever “Boom Boom” was filming, he must’ve had the background cut out because there was just pure blackness behind him. He could only be seen from the bust-up either way, but Elias wondered if the crazy doctor was in his own home, a lab, or just some secret hideout. Whatever the case, Elias did not feel good about this scenario. He didn’t forget actually meeting the old man in person at the comic convention a few months back, and he’d hoped he never had to see him again. 

Every time Elias thought his luck was starting to turn around, it would slap him in the face again days later. But oh, this was certainly the icing on the cake in terms of “bad luck.” What else did the universe have in store for him now? More scholarship rejections? A major rent increase? Eventual homelessness???

“With each clap of my hands, a new baby will be brought into the world from my DNA collection! Isn’t that wonderful?” Boom Boom continued and wiggled his gloved hands, snapping Elias out of the mental hellhole he was spiraling down. The video was still cropped like it was from the same man’s phone. “So without further ado, let’s get to it!”

Boom Boom clapped his hands once, twice, and thrice before speaking again. He had the largest smile on his face. “Boom! Three lucky ladies are now expecting mothers, but oh! I won’t say for who~” The old man giggled and his beady eyes gleamed. “Let’s see how many times I can clap my hands in one minute! I’ll set the timer now.”

“Oh, of course it’s nothing but a game to him!” Adino slapped the top counter part of the glass “desk.” “Wouldn’t be surprised if this sick fuck just wanted to get his rocks off by giving all these women his own seed under the name of the ‘heroes.’ ‘Won’t’ say who?’ What a farce!”

Elias dropped his hands and grunted, straining his body to sit up so his back wouldn’t ache later.

The old man had reached forward on the screen, and then an actual countdown appeared on the bottom right hand side of the screen, counting down from 01:00. Once he had pulled back—his back was kept ramrod straight, though—Boom Boom began clapping his hands fervently, and Elias could hear a couple female screams ring out from the crowd in the video, too. 

The camera started to shake and panned down to show one woman’s face—super zoomed-in—right in front of the camera. Her mouth opened like she was going to say something, but then the footage cut off and the screen returned to a wide-screen size. 

Robert stood in the center of the screen, microphone held up to his face as he gave that dead-eyed look all news reporters gave whenever they were awaiting a signal to continue. The background remained the same as before; aka, the large, main white tent of the field triage in downtown Menthol. 

“Thank you, Chad!” Robert said and smiled, albeit it was quite strained. “As you all know, Boom Boom continued to create more, er, ‘sudden pregnancies,’ with his final strike specifically targeting the supervillain, Waves, and our beloved hero, Rage, subsequently. Officials and heroes remain on the hunt for Boom Boom’s location, although he has been identified as Doctor Wilhelm Gunter, a retired maternity doctor who had specialized in helping women with birthing defects.”

“Gah!” Adino scoffed. “How does he go from helping women to forcing pregnancies? Like, did he wake up one day and eat the wrong cereal or something? What the hell is his motivation, other than clearly being a disgruntled boomer?”

“We are unsure of what his motive is,” Robert added, almost directly in response to Adino’s question. “But there is some speculation that he may have some kind of vendetta against Waves, given what he said before going dark.”

The camera cut to footage of the downtown demonstration again, but this one was taken from an actual news cameraman since it was the tail end of Boom Boom’s attack. Cars were stopped, people were mostly either running around or curled up on the ground, and Elias could make out some hero suits flashing, attending to as many civilians as they could.

Boom Boom was laughing so hard on the screen that he had his arms wrapped around himself, like a hug. “Try as you might to find me, little heroes,” he said, wiping at his eyes, “but I assure you I am well hidden! Now,” Boom Boom straightened up and rolled his shoulders back. “It’s time for my final act! Your favorite hero and world-dominating villain, Rage and Waves!”

“I forgot how dramatic the kooky man was,” Adino said.

Elias snorted and turned to look at Adino. “Well, we only saw him the one time, Dino.”

Adino rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, resting them on his stomach. “And that was enough to know!”

“Oh really? I thought he was just senile, not ‘dramatic,’” Elias air-quoted and mirrored Adino’s actions. But then two slow, reverberating claps from the TV pulled him back into the scene, curious about the “final act.”

Boom Boom’s livestream was still being played-back, and for a moment, Elias wondered if the old man could actually see the mayhem he was causing in the downtown vicinct. Was he watching the news on the computer he was surely using, too? Elias pondered this as he watched the kooky man splay his gloved hands outward, his chapped lips curved into a wicked smile.

“And there you have it, folks!” Boom Boom chuckled, his beady eyes sparkling. “Two lucky mothers carry the strongest offspring you can imagine, and worry not! I picked them myself~”

“I’m gonna be sick—” Adino said as Boom Boom hollered with laughter. Even Elias felt his blood still, the worst sort of sickening feeling washing over him. But he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the screen—and neither could Adino, it seemed. Not only that, but the time shown on Menthol’s downtown clock in the video made Elias even more uncomfortable.

12:19pm, it read, which was after Elias had drifted into his lunch-time nap. And as far as Elias was concerned, he was baby-free before then. Given what Boom Boom had said about “picking them himself” and the coinciding timestamp, Elias was about ninety-percent sure he and Adino might be the seriously unlucky two.

“And Waves,” Boom Boom wiped at his eyes again, “since I’m sure you’re dying to find your next-of-kin, I’ll give you one hint! The mother I chose is the least expected person here.” His smile fell as he pulled the gloves from his hands, one finger at a time. “Do with that as you will, everyone, but for now I must depart. I can already hear the little heroes sneaking around above—oh! How exciting! Tata, and congratulations to every new mother. I eagerly await all your stories!”

After his final say, Boom Boom reached forward and cut the camera. The building screens then all changed to a white static, like a retro TV would when the channel couldn’t be connected. But the chaos in the streets remained, and even the news cameraman had a hard time keeping the lens steady. So then the camera cut to Lindsey, the usual day time news reporter at the main station desk, although the screen behind her still featured the downtown madness.

“If you’re not in an emergency situation, or are free from facing immediate labor, we urge you not to call 911 and stay where you are because the first responders are spread very thin as of this moment.” Lindsey said. Her voice sounded a little strained, however, and Elias wondered if perhaps she’d also been affected by The Boom. “Please be considerate and let us help everyone in critical condition, as they get priority right now. Thank you, everyone, for your patient cooperation and understanding.”

Elias picked up the remote and shut off the TV. His own blank expression stared back at him on the reflective surface of the black screen, and Elias briefly contemplated calling his doctor for an immediate check-up. But someone had to make sure the new kid didn’t burn the store down in their absence, and he doubted his doctor was available for immediate care, anyway. So instead, he shifted his weight to face Adino and popped his lips.

“I think we need to see my doctor tomorrow and should probably close down the store, don’t you think?” he said and met his best friend’s brown eyes.

“Agreed,” Adino nodded, but his voice shook, and his brown skin was as pale as Elias had ever seen it before. He stretched his arms over his head, one hand grasped around the other wrist as he did so. “Besides, it’s not like Jay is going to get much business with this bull shittery going on, now is he?” he continued, trying to play it cool.

“You’re Goddamn right there,” Elias laughed dryly before eventually coughing into his fist.

He didn’t feel like any of what had happened was a laughing matter.

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While you wait for the next episode, try checking these other two entries out, or my own Premium Novel, OMEGA Magazine! Links below (author desc)!

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