Colby might have exaggerated when he first announced the barbecue. I’d barely been at work for an hour that day when Tyler flooded the group chat (meaning he texted more than 3 words) letting us know that it would be a potluck instead. He’d handle the burgers and buns but we’d have to bring everything else if we wanted any party to happen.

I liked to imagine that when he told his mother about his plans to host a barbecue, she reminded him that she would not be paying for it. Then, he quickly realized that food for 12 people was more than his jobless high schooler income could handle.

James was a sweetheart and offered to drive me to Tyler’s. So, like a suburban gay stereotype, we knocked on the front door holding a casserole and drinks. To be clear, the casserole was James, not me. 

“Hellooo,” Tyler’s older sister drawled, swinging open the door both lazily and dramatically. “Welcome to Tyler’s party. It’s good to see you again, Elliot.”

She insisted on calling me Elliot because, in her words, we weren’t close enough to use nicknames.

“It’s good to see you too. You’re sticking around for the party?”

“No!” she laughed, flicking long straight hair over her shoulder.  “I’m just chaperoning so my parents don’t stick around to breathe down Tyler’s neck.”

Her laughter quieted quickly when her eyes fell on James. Then, she smoothly stretched out her hand.

“Hey, I’m Tori . . . ”

She trailed off, staring at James pointedly. Technically her face didn’t make her look any older than us. Her skin was a cool dark brown and her sharp brows and ombre lip were worn by half the black girls at school. But her energy alone screamed maturity. I’d bet a thousand bucks James could feel that she was Tyler’s older sister. So, the subconscious urge to gain the cool older sibling’s acceptance would have been hitting him like a ton of bricks.

“Sorry, I’m James,” he shot out his hand, almost dropping the casserole. “Nice to meet you.”

After pointing out his British accent in the coolest, most casual way possible, Tori turned around, announcing for the house that she’d be ‘in her room.’

The front door led directly into the kitchen where Tyler intently fussed over the placement of the paper plate stack and container of plastic utensils. Instead of saying hi to either of us, he looked down at James’s glass dish with a smile.

“Cool, casserole,” he sighed, plucking the tray out of James’s hands. “I didn’t know you could cook.”

“I can’t. My mum helped me make this stew last night when I realized I didn’t have anything to bring.”

It was a miracle I didn’t comment on how insanely British that whole sentence was. We were the first to arrive though so when Tyler shooed us away to get comfortable, we plopped onto his couch and started talking about other things. Non-British things actually. Like the sun that was barely peeking past the clouds today for the first time in weeks. And the pointed lack of cohesive decor in Tyler’s living room which somehow made it that much cozier.

Colby showed up next, carrying parmesan crusted chicken and raising the volume in the house by 30%. Then came Rin and Stephanie and finally her friends (those girls either carpooled together or timed their entry into the house and both possibilities seem entirely possible). Several conversations were going on at once and oftentimes that meant James and I were talking about completely different things. But I stayed glued to his side.

A part of it was the fact that we were surrounded by my friends. Leaving James to fend for himself would have been an act of cruelty. The cardinal sin of partying. But also, as the food got served and people’s spots around the house shifted, it became more and more obvious that attention was on us.

We were the new couple.

The gay couple.

There’s a chance my paranoia was overdramatizing the whole thing but there’s no other way to put it. Proving the legitimacy of my relationship was starting to feel important. So we stayed thigh to thigh, the party carried on, and I didn’t think about how anytime I held James’s hand, Rin could see it.

At some point in the afternoon, Tori just materialized in the kitchen, silently piling food onto her plate. The next thing I knew, she was sitting with Khue, laughing over forkfuls of casserole. Or stew I mean. Where James and I failed in impressing the older sibling, Khue succeeded. 

The backyard screen door swooshed when Tyler opened it and he automatically looked to where his sister was eating across the room.

“Tori, can you watch the burgers while I come inside for a bit?”

As the grill master, Tyler had been stepping in and out a lot. Most of the time people followed him outside to continue conversations or Colby followed him to talk his ear off but his last stretch out in the cold had been alone. I didn't know exactly what he wanted to “come inside” for but I assumed it had to do with soaking in the socialization.

“No. Absolutely not,” she crossed her arms, a killer stare setting into place. “You’re the one who decided to have a grown-up party on your own. You handle it.”

“You can’t just watch the burgers for one second?”

“Then be forced to cook for you and your little friends for the next hour? Absolutely not.” 

Half of the room was cringing just having to listen to a guy who usually seemed mature and in control get shut down so swiftly. My first thought was that refusing to help was a tad dramatic of Tori. Then I imagined Tyler “forgetting” about the burgers so Tori was left to deal with them while he entertained. If Tyler was even half as “forgetful” as my dad, that was a real possibility.

Tori’s eyes scanned the room, eventually falling on me where I sipped absently on a soda can.

“Elliot, you’re a helpful guy,” she smiled, perfectly straight white teeth gleaming. “Do you want to help Tyler with the cooking?”

“Okay.”

“Thank you.” 

I didn’t even have the chance to say no. Her cool older sibling powers were too strong. The excuse of keeping James company didn’t work when he and Mickie looked like two peas in a pod. I’m not sure how they started talking about rock music but when I begrudgingly peeled off the couch, they were exchanging song recommendations. 

Tyler thanked me with a pat on the back on my way out. And a second later, I stood outside, staring at the closed barbecue. Tyler had positioned it so he could see directly into the living room but even with the glass, I couldn’t hear a thing. I could see their mouths moving and hear a vague buzz of happy noises but nothing to keep me up to date with any conversations.

I completely understood why Tyler wanted to not be here.

Like I thought, there wasn’t anything pressing for him to do inside. He grabbed another burger from the tray and munched energetically while Colby yapped about something, but he could have done all of that next to the barbecue.

Tori was a genius for saying no.

I’d been ignoring my phone since we got here because I wanted to stay present but now the slim black rectangle called to me like a siren. I’d barely turned it on when the screen door slid open again and Rin walked through.

“Shit, it’s cold out here,” he cursed, tugging his measly zip up tighter around his body.

“So why are you out here?” I asked. “You should be inside with all the cool people.”

“I am with all the cool people,” he said immediately. “How could it be cool in there without my best friend?”

He let those words hang in the air, his smile just gentle enough to let me know he was being serious. So I turned away from him, hiding my face behind my hands.

My feeble attempt to avoid embarrassment backfired. Rin laughed, forcibly pulling my hands off my face to reveal a horrible blush. I thought he’d be done when he exposed my face but he kept his hands locked around my wrists, drawing me in just a bit closer with the hold. 

“You blush so easily,” he muttered, eyes slowly tracing my face. “It’s cute.”

Of course he pulled this shit now when I had burning meat to look after and both of our partners watching us with the see-through doors.

“Shut up.”

Laughing when I said that made it sound normal, I think. I hoped laughing reduced some of the sting when I pushed against his chest, anxious to regain some much needed distance. Because nothing about what he just did felt normal but normal is what the two of us desperately needed.

Luckily for me, we were standing next to a freaking barbecue. Whether I liked it or not, I was in charge of getting this stuff cooked for the foreseeable future. Why not use it as a distraction from the mind numbing guy next to me?

So that’s what I did. It was good timing for Rin to pull the worst prank because the bottom of the patties had been pretty close to burning. As slowly as I could, I flipped each and every one, stalling long enough for my overactive gay heart to calm the fuck down.