Drava. She said she thinks I have changed. She says her family says I have changed. Have I?
I left her at the dragon's lair. The dragon was my father, but it doesn't matter. I could not go to see her across the elven continent. I am eldryn. Dragon and a mix of elven races. She is entirely elven. A decade ago I allowed myself to be acpitvated by her - and captive. I thought my life was over because I could not imagine a future. I was dragon, but not Alpha. My father, Hassah, thinks like an Alpha but he is a rather short dragon. I outgrew him in height as a teen. Physical size matters not. He was an overbearing and burdening love. How could I know it was abuse, except for what I felt?
I hated him and I feared him. I know he loved me, but what is love? I think I know, but... I can't say I feel love him as I wish to show love to others. His love is locked on me. As his firstborn "son" I am favored. It was a favor I relied on but never wanted to be bound by. My sister, Kathryn is also eldryn. She has a pride that never allowed me to help her. I know I'm rambling.
Now, Drava thinks I am a different person now. I've run away sevaral times. I have felt depressed and deprived. I avoid conflict. When I do set boundaries, my anxiety is so palpable that I feel rael physical pain from the psychological and biological strain. It is against my nature. I want others to be happy, but I only know what I want and what I think others want.
I am Nikki. I was born on the east coast in the woods of the northern reaches. We soon made roost along the beaches of the the southwest.
I was split into two from the strain of maintaining a lie of love. Let me introduce you to Tyogre.
I would rather be nice and say lies, than face the truth and feel like a terrible person. Even now after so long doing this, I still think this is one of the better outcomes so far. It could have been worse. Dragons are said to mature at teh age of twenty-two. For us it seems to have been 37. However, none of this would be possible without the wisdom of herbs and roots and potions that provide what my brain lacks.
I am writing this because something has been on my mind, and I need to get it out on record in a creative way before I can move forward with Lilly's Rage.
This is a process for me, for the long haul.
Feel free to comment. I may or may not read them. Im not going to bother with tags for this.
Trinity are three personalities in one vessel. They share the same physical Form, but different Thoughts. They have different Memories, and different Sexualities. Similar to split personality disorder, they are each their own person, however they remember each of the other's experiences and share the same memory. All the maturity markers apply- - except maybe gore.
TRIGGER WARNING!
This novel has Mental Health Topics, Abuse - Emotional, and Profanity.
This novel does not have the following: Blood/Gore, Drug or alcohol abuse, Eating disorders, Suicide and self-harm, physical abuse, or nudity.
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