The hall all of us candidates had entered was huge. There were huge oak desks stretching for miles, with white-robed beings sorting through stacks and stacks of paper and files that were hurriedly dumped on the desk. Above each desk was a chute that dropped even more files into a box behind each desk, ensuring that there was a never-ending amount of work distributed.

The attendants at each desk were either flipping rapidly through the files and the papers or they were pushing all the documents into a bin at the foot of the desk, where all the documents disappeared into the black depths of the bin. 

The attendants were all of different races, species, and stature. However, they all wore the same white robes, which indicated that they were all attendants of the same rank. 

Before I could turn and ask a fellow candidate for more information, attendants started approaching us, each calling out a number or a name, and the corresponding attendant came forward and collected the candidate. Seeing how quickly the turnaround was, I decided to wait my turn calmly.

After what felt like 30 minutes, which resulted in at least three new sets of new candidates being bright in through the doors and met with an attendant, I started to get restless and looked around for someone I could ask for help. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I saw someone running down towards me. They stopped and bent over as if out of breath, then started again, carrying a stack of paper and several files under their arm. 

“A-A-Alaina…” I heard the attendant call out faintly before stopping again and panting, looking really worse for wear “ …Winteers..” they said and started running towards me again. 

“Urr yeah, that’s me. Are you ok?” I asked, looking really worried for the attendant. 

As the attendant reached me, it turned out to be a short elderly woman. She had small but beautiful butterfly wings that were fluttering ever so often, and she looked at me through a pair of green glasses that were perched on her nose, making her large eyes look bigger still.

“Sorry for the wait; our department hasn’t had to handle a candidate in over 15 years. It took me a while to get here as the office has been pushed right at the very back. Now, if you follow me, please, I’ll take you to our IT department, where you can get your gear and set up your email and corporate account,” the attendant explained. 

We walked down the aisle flanked by desks, past many other candidates and attendees already discussing terms, and out through a set of doors into a quiet empty hallway, much like the one I came in from. 

Then we turned a corner and kept walking, and we passed by the doors to another hall full of more attendants and candidates, but we did not go inside. 

Hall after hall, we passed, but still, we kept on walking.

“Wow, this is really far,” I said, wondering how far away we had to go to complete this signup.

“Oh yes, most of these halls cater to Knights and Medics. The Entertainment Class is very big when it comes to those wanting to be Actors and Singers, but not for the Musician Class. The last Candidate who signed up to be a Bard was 15 years ago, and because of that, my department doesn’t process many candidates, so you can understand why they have assigned us smaller facilities compared to the rest,” The attendee explained, beaming up at me as though I had asked such a good question.

I felt a bit shy. “ Can I maybe help you carry something? Like that stack of papers?” I asked, trying to be helpful. She had walked all this way with these papers? The least I could do was help on the way back.

“Oh sure, thank you so much, love; my arms were killing me,” The attendant said and handed me the papers and documents to handle. 

I gathered them up, and surprisingly, they weren’t that heavy. However, the attendant was a really tiny old lady, so it’s no wonder she was struggling. She still had a tight grip on the folders under her arms as well, so helping her out with the papers was the least I could do.

“In the past, musicians were allowed to be just musicians. Now, with the number of Entertainment Class apprentices being kidnapped, the council has decided to make all the actors and singers take up additional roles so that they can move around more freely when they are off work. It comes with being famous, you know? Please get all sorts of ideas in their heads and want to take their favorite actor or actress home to their home planet permanently. Technically, there has been no recorded Musician kidnapped, but you know, the actors felt that it was unfair that only they had to study harder, so they made it harder for everyone in the Entertainment Class,” The attendant explained, looking up at me sympathetically.

“No, it’s fine. I think it’s great that I get to learn extra skills,” I smiled. I mean, how hard can it really be to do music and cook?

“Ah well, I guess you must be a musical genius then. Good for you if you’ve already mastered your twelve instruments; your field test will be a breeze then.” The attendant beamed as my jaw dropped.

“Twelve? Twelve instruments?” I exclaimed as we neared a set of double doors.

“Oh you didn’t know? Well, I suppose I should let your reporting officer fill you in, but just between you and me, wind instruments are the fastest to pick up. And cheap! You can even get away with a handmade reed pipe or a bamboo flute if you can get your hands on a blueprint from a librarian or a galactic engineer class apprentice,” the attendant explained as she pushed open the doors and led us into what looked to be, a dusty rundown office.

The office resembled the halls that we had passed by, with the oak tables and the overhead chutes, but there were only five desks, and only four of them looked used. Three other old ladies sat at one desk, each reading through and giggling to the other about the documents on the table.

“Look what I’ve brought, ladies, fresh meat!” The attendant said as she led me over to the knitting circle and dumped the files on the table. I placed the stack of papers next to it, and immediately, one of the old ladies pushed all the paper and documents into the bin.

“Hey, we just brought those in!” I explained, and the group burst out laughing.

“Oh, never you mind about that; we just got Ethel to carry them out to look all formal and official and the like,” the old lady who had pushed the documents into the chute said, beaming through the lenses of her goggle-like spectacles.

“Well, go on, introduce us,” another old lady said, poking the attendant, who I guess was called Ethel, in the arm.

“Alright, alright, don’t get your panties in a twist. Hannah, Margaret, and Josephine, this is Alaina Winters. She is a Butterfloid, as you read in her papers, and she has registered for Entertainment Class, Musician, which means we finally have our first Bard in 15 years! 

All the ladies started hooting and hollering, and Margaret even got up to do a little shimmy.

“Woah woah, why are you all so excited? I just want to learn how to play my harp…well, a harp, seeing as I’ve lost my harp,” I said, rubbing my chest to calm myself, I had been trying to not think about how I had dumped my harp in that red basket like it was nothing when it was the very reason I started down this path. 

“Oh, don’t worry about that, love; we noticed a new instrument had been added to the lineup. You might be seeing your harp again very soon,” Josephine piped up.

“Really? Where?” I asked, looking around to see if I could see where the instrument lineup was.

“Relax, all in due time. Let’s get you all signed up, and then we can notify your reporting officer that you are ready to see them,” Ethel explained, sitting at her desk. Margaret and Hannah went off to the side, where they started putting objects into a crate. Josephine brought over an ancient-looking laptop and pulled over a chair to sit next to Ethel, and then she turned on the computer.

“Grab a chair from Margaret’s desk and get comfortable. We have quite a few things for your to sign up for, and then the girls will bring over your gear, which you will need to sign for” Ethel said, patting yet another stack of papers that had just been coughed out of the overhead chute, and landed on the table moments ago. 

After what felt like hours of typing, discussing, and signing documents, I finally was in possession of one email address, one corporate account with my up-to-date particulars, one backpack, one flashlight, and one sleeping bag. 

Thankfully, due to the technology of the Galactic Engineering Class, each backpack came with a lightweight collapsible mess tin, spork, and cup. The ladies told me that we would only be given ration packs once we dropped in our first assignment area, so for now, we could eat at the canteens and get any toiletries we needed from the council bookstore that provided everything for every piece known to the collective planets.

“Alright, that is all you need for now as a Field Entertainer Class 0; now we will start your gears for a Field Cook Class 0,” Hannah said as she brought over a second create, this time packed to the brim with stuff.

By the time I had finished signing for all the things I had needed as a Field Cook, I had got carpal tunnel.

“Why do I need all these tiny spice jars in this bag made for little knives? who put this much stuff into food?” I asked, holding up a portable spice bag that had all these tiny slots for tiny vials of turmeric, cumin seeds, and other spices.

“Oh dear, you don’t know how to play twelve instruments, and you don’t know how to cook? I guess we’ll be seeing you again for a different course in six months!” Ethel sighed, shaking her head solemnly.

“Wait no, I’m a fast learner. Sorry, I’ll figure out what to do with all these,” I said, hurriedly shoving the spice sachet back into my bag.

“Tumeric is good to put into teas if you catch a cold, my dear. As a field cook, you’re not just cooking to replenish your nutrients but to boost your immune system,” Hannah said kindly, pulling out some knitting from a bag and starting to work on what looked like a scarf.

“And when in doubt, time things out. It’s easier to re-cook something than to de-cook something, so always test potatoes while they are boiling or meat while it is simmering, and always make sure to use equal parts of sugar to salt if your are not sure about the balance in a recipe.” Margaret said kindly as well and then went to a small pantry in the corner to make some tea. 

“You’re fine. It’s always a rocky start at the beginning, but I’m sure you’re a smart girl; you’ll get the hang of it,” Josephine grinned as she continued to type away at the ancient laptop. 

“Thank you so much for your advice; I’m sorry to have caused you all so much trouble, having to deal with a double major and all,” I said, hanging my head.

“No, no trouble at all. As I said, we haven’t had a Musician candidate in years, which means you have been the candidate for the last 15 years! These days, youth are very discouraged from taking up being musicians. The pay is not great, and the jobs are often outperformed or outdone by technology. However, don’t worry, if you stick to the path and follow our dream course that we have specially designed for people like you, you’ll be calling the stars to your beck and call in no time,” Ethel smiled happily as she stamped all the papers I had sign with a “witness stamp.”

“Call the stars?” I asked, bewildered. “ I’m sorry, I’m just keen on learning how to play the harp,” I said, looking from old attendant to old attendant.

“All in due time. Anyway, that’s the last of the lot. You may now go through the doors at the end of the hall, turn right, and knock at the first door you see three times. Your reporting Officer will be there to greet you,” Ethel explained cheerfully.

I stood up and grabbed my bag. It was really heavy, jam-packed with item after item. 

The old attendants stood, too, and they all gathered around me and gave me a big group hug.

“Welcome to the family, my darling,” Josephine said.

“Have a safe trip, my dear,” Hanna said.

“Take care and be safe,” said Margaret.

“Keep your wits about you always,” added Ethel before they all released me with tears in their eyes.

“Well, I hope there will be more like me coming through those doors in the future.” I smiled, feeling my heart warm from their kind words and advice.

“It’s alright; we are happy only to handle the best of the best; make us proud,” Josephine said and clapped me on the back, grinning.

I smiled and waved at them and then headed over to the door, wondering what was in store for me next.