"Alex?" I suddenly heard.

I slowly looked up and met John's blue eyes.

His smile turned into a frown, then a look of concern.

"Are you... okay?" he asked, seeing my face.

He sat down next to me, leaning forward to get a better look.

I felt him place his hand on mine, and I glanced down, but I did not react, so he began to gently rub my hand with his ring finger, offering comfort.

His pheromones were too faint.  I had spent so much time with him that I felt comfortable around them, and they even brought me a sense of calm. I snuggled closer and rested my head on his chest, filling myself with his now familiar scent.

I felt him tense as soon as I did, but then he relaxed. He put his arm around me and held it there. His scent and warmth comforted me, so I closed my eyes.

It was all over for good, and my heart ached almost as much as the first time everything had fallen apart.

A great and wonderful part of my life was coming to an end, and I had been preparing for this since what happened, but it still hurt.

I felt numb.

I raised my arms and wrapped them around John's back, hugging him. I wanted to feel even more comforted. His pheromones were closer and more concentrated in this position, which helped me relax. It was like when his mother comforted me, but somehow it worked better with him.

He rested his head on mine, rubbing my back.

After a long while, I sat up, feeling a little embarrassed for seeking comfort from him, considering I did not yet feel we were close enough for something like this, but at the same time, he was one of the few people I had by my side right now.

"I'm sorry," I said, my hands resting on my knees, stretching my arms, which had gone numb.

"Don't worry," he replied with a sweet voice.

I took a deep breath and looked up at the sky.

It was cloudy and did not help with my mood at all, so I sighed.

My body felt heavy, my eyes puffy, and I was tired. It was still early, but I was already in this state.

I felt John run a finger along my cheek, probably wiping away the remnants of a tear.

My eyes went to him, earning a smile from him.

"You look like a panda, only instead of black, you're all red," he proclaimed, trying to cheer me up.

I groaned and rubbed my eyes.

"No, no." John took my hands, pulling them away. "They'll swell up even more, and you'll have frog eyes." He chuckled. "Although you still look cute."

I looked at him after his comment.

"Oh, sorry." He smiled somewhat sheepishly and looked away. It seemed like he had said it without even thinking.

He loosened his grip and lowered his hands, squeezing them lightly. I did the same reflexively and felt a slight pressure on one of them, so I looked down at my hand. There was the key to our house.

Old house.

I stroked it for a few seconds and put it in my jacket pocket, turning back to John. I still wanted to go back to the hotel and wallow in self-pity, but he had comforted me, so I should accompany him at least for a while.

"So, what designs are we going to look at?" I asked, trying to sound cheerful and forcing myself to smile.

He looked at me for a second.

"I'll take you home for today," he said. "Well, hotel."

He smiled at me tenderly, gently brushing a strand of hair aside.

I looked down and simply nodded.

When we stood up, John gave me a small, gentle nudge to sit back down.

"Wait here for a second, I'll be right back."

And without another word, he ran off somewhere. When he returned, he had a bottle of water in his hands.

"You must be thirsty," he said with a smile.

I gave him a weak smile and thanked him for the drink. 

On the way back to the hotel, we passed the laundromat, which reminded me of his jacket.

"John, I'll give you your jacket tomorrow, okay? It's at the laundromat right now, so..."

"Oh." He glanced at my new jacket and smiled. "Okay. By the way, it looks good on you."

I tried to smile back.

I lowered my head and we continued to the hotel. When we arrived, I turned to say goodbye, suddenly feeling his hand on my head. 

"That's it. Everything will be okay."

I froze at his sudden touch and attempt at comfort, just like his mother had done long ago.

I looked up at him and he was smiling, but it did not reach his eyes. I only saw worry there. He kept his eyes on my head, so he did not notice me staring at him.

When he realized, he lowered his hand and cleared his throat.

"Come on, go inside." He gave me a little push toward the door to get me in.

"See you." I said goodbye and went inside.

Back in the room, I threw myself onto the bed and covered my eyes with my arms.

Today I had faced reality.

Matt had an omega carrying his child  in her womb; he was moving to South Korea and would have his whole family there.

A lump formed in my throat, but I managed to hold back the tears.

Five months had passed, and I had only seen him once. Now that I had seen him again, it was as if no time had passed at all.

His arms around me still felt fresh, even though I had hugged John afterward. His eyes staring at me and those pained expressions would not leave my mind.

I did not feel capable of forgetting him.

I still felt he was my alpha. No matter how many excuses I had to hate him and cling to them, I could not. Our last conversation had made it clear that I loved him and he loved me, but ours just could not be.

He had been with me through the best and worst moments of my life, and now that I knew he was suffering and blaming himself for everything, I could not do anything for him.

There had to be something.

Suddenly, a thought came to my mind. 

Maybe there was a way to do something.

I could simply belong to him forever.

Perhaps my destiny had always been to remain alone, belonging to him from afar.

That way, I would never have to suffer again, nor fear that fate would play with me again as it had.

I would not worry about that anymore, because I would only live on my memories with Matt.

So, I decided to promise him something.

That I would be his omega forever, even if he was not here.

As soon as I decided that, I felt as if a weight had been lifted from my shoulders, but at the same time, another weight took hold of that place.

I leaned over to the nightstand and took out her jacket. I snuggled up next to her and felt myself slowly drifting off to sleep.