Becca
This is how I find myself sitting in Jocelyn’s car on Monday morning, unable to get out. After our first—and best kiss of my life, no offense to Lucas—Shane left that night with a promise he’d be by the next day to pick me up for the start of our shift. As promised, he showed up dressed and ready for work 20 minutes early, which was for the best, given we spent those 20 minutes on my hand-me-down couch, making out like the teenagers we are.
While I worked on my project, he waited on my tables. Though we kept the PDA to a minimum during our shift, there were lots of light touches, each one sending my heart fluttering to the rhythm of the butterflies swirling in my belly. No matter where he was, or where he went, I could feel his eyes like a constant caress against my skin. It was intoxicating. Then at the end of the night, he handed me the money, drove me back to my place, then kissed me senseless once again. This time, he left me with the promise he would see me at school today.
And that’s when reality—like the bitch that she is—reared her ugly head and slapped me straight in my stupid face.
School. The place where Shane and his friends are worshiped by teachers and the student body like they’re gods. They are allowed to do and act as they wish, for who are we, the lowly citizens of our small town, to stand up to Ruby Creek’s most elite? In our school, the fact they allow us to breathe the same air as them is looked upon by the student body with a sense of awe.
What would they say if they found out Shane Montgomery kissed me?
Me.
Becca Franks.
The daughter of the town pariah. The drug addict who attempted to extort and take down Charles Kline—the head of our town’s most elite families. My mother is known as the desperate, deceitful woman who tried to trick Charles Kline, first into a relationship, then later, when that didn’t work, out of his money. Will they think I’m doing the same to Shane?
“What is up with you? Are you sick or something?” Joss’s forehead crinkles like she’s worried I’ll barf all over the back seat of her car.
“Yes. I think I might be. Would you mind taking me home?” With the back of my hand, I wipe my brow, surprised by the amount of perspiration pooling there.
“You were fine before.” Felicia leans back from where she’s sitting in the front passenger seat and puts her hand on my forehead. “You’re clammy, but no fever. If you ask me, given how pale you look and how fast you’re breathing, I’d say you’re on the verge of a panic attack.”
Yes! That’s it. Given the circumstances, it makes perfect sense, and it’s why I can’t go to school today. I need to go home.
“Spill it. Now.” Joss demands, an eyebrow raised, like she already knows what I’m hiding. “Everyone knows you spent the weekend working with Shane, so what happened? What did he do?”
“Nothing,” I react in a high-pitched whine that, to my dismay, makes it seem like I’m lying. “He did nothing wrong. I swear it.”
“So what is it? What has you so freaked out you won’t get out of the car?”
Ugh. I want to hold it in, I really do, but with my heart nearly beating out of my chest, it feels like if I don’t let it out, my insides might literally explode.
“He kissed me,” I blurt out, then fold over onto my lap, with my face buried in my hands.
“Shane Montgomery kissed you?” Felicia’s incredulous squeal makes me groan in shame. She screamed it loud enough that I’m certain everyone within a two-mile radius of Ruby Creek probably heard her.
“Yes. Please stop repeating what I say, and for God’s sake, don’t mention his name.”
“What happened?” I hear the unmistakable sound of Jocelyn turning in her seat so she can face me. Unlike Felicia, who’s bouncing in her seat with unbridled excitement, the gentleness in Joss’s voice communicates genuine concern. She knows how I feel about letting people get too close.
When I sit up and look up at my friends, I can’t hide the emotion pooling in my eyes. “It happened Saturday night. After we closed. His friends had stopped in earlier in the day…”
“Wait, which friends?” Felicia interrupts, already sensing where I’m going with this.
“Amanda, Nick, and Conner. They were so damn rude and inconsiderate.”
“Oh, so they felt comfortable enough to be themselves. How nice,” Joss rolls her eyes.
“Yeah, well, Shane stuck up for me and then asked them to leave, but not before Conner and Amanda made it clear I don’t belong anywhere near their golden prince. When he was walking me home, he apologized on their behalf. That’s when he told me he didn’t care what they think. That he wants to be with me. That he believes we’re meant to be.” We’re inevitable, were the exact words he used, but I keep those to myself, hoarding and unwilling to share them like they’re some sort of priceless treasure.
“Aww,” Felicia coos. “And what did you say?”
“Nothing, I think. I just stood there dumbfounded, I guess.”
“And then he kissed you?” Something in Joss’s tone raises my hackles.
“No, not at first. It was consensual. He told me he wanted to kiss me and asked if I wanted it too. I said yes.” I groan, once again burying my face in my hands.
“If you wanted him to kiss you, then why are you acting like this? Wait, unless… Oh my God! Is Shane Montgomery a terrible kisser?”
“Why are you yelling?” I scoot forward, smacking a hand over Felicia’s mouth. “Stop being so loud, and for god’s sake, stop using his damn name.”
Shaking me off, her smile brightens. “I see, so it’s the opposite then. He’s an amazing kisser.” When I groan again, it only encourages her. “I knew it. It’s those lips. So full and soft, with that perfectly plump lower lip that makes you want to suck it off.”
“Oh my god, stop!” I smack my hand over her mouth again.
“So you kissed? What’s the big deal?”
“Joss.” How can she not understand? “The big deal is that I’m me and he’s him.” As she stares at me like I’m an idiot, I’m surprised I even have to explain. “I’m a nobody, worse than a nobody. I’m the illegitimate daughter of Maggie Franks, a drug addict and known femme fatale who tried and failed to ruin one of the kings of this town. What if everyone thinks I’m just like her? That I’m trying to do the same to Shane?”
“This again,” Joss rolls her eyes, then shoots me a glare. Felicia, on the other hand, takes pity on me and reaches for my hand. “I hate that I took you to see that woman. Worst mistake of my life and yours.”
“If you hadn’t, I would have been stuck living a lie. Always the butt of the town’s jokes, never understanding why everyone looks at me the way they do.”
“Yeah, maybe, except now every decision you make is based on your fear of ending up like your mom.”
“Josselyn,” with a pointed scowl, Felicia comes to my defense. “What our dear friend is trying to say is that you, dear Becca, are not your mother.” She squeezes my hand. “And Shane, he’s not Charles Kline. There’s little risk of history repeating itself, especially because you’ve got us. Joss and I would never allow Shane or anyone to get away with what Charles Kline did to your family.”
“I know all that, I do. But what about them?” I point at the students milling about, all going through their normal morning routine as they wait for the bell to ring. “If they find out Shane is interested in me, they’ll think I’m just like her. That I’m tricking him and taking advantage of him to get access to his money and the power and prestige that comes with his name.”
“Not to burst your bubble, but it’s far more likely they’ll assume he’s just using you.”
Felicia gasps as Jocelyn’s words snake their way around me, squeezing the air from my lungs.
Oh my god, she’s right.
They’ll think he’s using me.
That he’s the one tricking me into thinking he likes me, and the worst part is, how do I know that he’s not?
“Stop being such a bitch, Joss.” Felicia admonishes.
“I’m not a bitch, I’m a realist. Look, Becca, don’t you think you’re making too big a deal out of this? It was one kiss.” Reading the look on my face, she corrects, “Okay, it was one weekend with kissing involved, right? Is that better?” I nod, unable to look at either of my friends. “So who cares? You’re both consenting, mature 18-year-old adults. People our age kiss—a lot. It means nothing.”
Except it doesn’t feel like nothing. Instead, it feels like the start of something new, something I’d bet neither of us is ready for.
“You’re right,” I respond while attempting to breathe around the panic blocking my airway. “It means nothing. He probably won’t even mention it.”
“That’s right.” Felicia soothes, giving my hand a light squeeze. “Chances are no one will notice anything’s changed between you.”
Right, I think to myself while doing my best to forget that his friends not only saw us together, but also witnessed him coming to my defense against them.
“Great. Now that we’re all in agreement, could we please get out of the car and get on with our day? The bell’s about to ring”
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Author’s Note:
In this chapter, Becca's in a panic over her evolving relationship with Shane. Given her mother's history, she's also worried about what others might think.
I'd love to hear your thoughts on this chapter. Are you surprised Becca is having second thoughts?
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