Juliet went back to her dorm room in a stir of confusion. No matter what Seth said, those protruding teeth could not be ignored. Was he a vampire? He insisted he wasn’t, but if that was true, why did he back off so abruptly when she accused him of suffering from blood lust?  

She sat down at her desk and was about to open her laptop when she caught sight of her reflection in the mirror beside her desk. The mirror itself was tinted slightly pink and the frame was a shiny metal to match. She scrutinized her reflection with mild annoyance. To her, she resembled a child who wasn’t even trying to look like an adult. Was she really the kind of woman Seth wanted to bite? He had suggested more than once that they head back to her dorm room. If she hadn’t panicked and sent him away, he would have come over. She looked around at the mess on the floor. Her poster wasn’t the only reason she didn’t want him in her room.

Juliet stretched her limbs and started tidying up. She changed the sheets and made the bed and got a load of laundry ready to go. Then she emptied her entire closet and went through every piece of junk she had thrown in there in the past month and a half. She looked at her clothes, knickknacks, plushies, pictures, and everything else she owned. Soon, she was sitting in the middle of a donut made of girlish trinkets; fuzzy picture frames, colorful hair accessories, t-shirts with gaudy mascots on them. This was why she was a baby-pink spring and not a dark-cranberry autumn.    

From the look of things, there was a part of her that hadn’t grown up yet. What was the rush? There hadn’t been a reason to hurry the process until she met Seth.

Dissatisfaction flooded her as she recalled her last vision when Seth kissed her. She pressed her fingers to her lips as she remembered. It had been a vision of womanhood she hadn’t known existed. A woman who accepted reality, who didn’t run from it. She had filled the cup with her own blood and felt contentment inside her. The sacrifice was within boundaries she was willing to accept. Those boundaries were widespread. Juliet had never felt that way in her life. Her mother, the only example of womanhood in her life, certainly hadn’t been like that. If Juliet had been in pain, her mother had encouraged her to forget about it, like ignorance was bliss. What if that was wrong? What if knowledge was bliss?  

Juliet sat and tried to imagine what kinds of clothes the woman in her mind wore. Black certainly, but what else? Rich browns, orange, gold, and only white in touches. What style? Juliet thought of long fitted skirts, lovely textured sweaters, and the highest of high-heeled boots. Hardly anything in her closet fit the image of what she wanted to become.

She looked at her wardrobe strewn across the floor and, before she knew it, she had changed her mind about doing laundry. There was no point in washing clothes or bedding she was going to throw away.

Before she gathered everything up in garbage bags, she decided to check her bank account. She didn’t know how much it would cost to outfit herself the way she wanted, but she couldn’t risk meeting Seth again while wearing a black t-shirt with a smiley face on it, which was unfortunately what she had worn that day.  

Her bank balance wasn’t great, but there was a little leeway in her budget. She decided to make the most of it.

She was about to close her laptop when it occurred to her to check her email and blog. No new messages from Seth. However, she had his email address now.

“Hey Seth,” she typed. “Sorry about today. I would like to try again if you’re still up for it.” She wrote these words hesitantly. She had never had a relationship with a guy who couldn’t keep his hands off her. His feelings couldn’t have cooled since lunch, or could they? She continued typing. “I have something I need to take care of. I’ll get in touch with you when I’m ready to see you. Until then, please don’t pressure me. It will be worth the wait. Love, Juliet.”

Juliet pressed the ‘send’ button and went back to her cleaning. Finishing, she left her throwaways in garbage bags by the door. Then she took a shower.

When she was finished, she came back to her room and found a pair of pants and a shirt that she felt comfortable wearing, considering her new image. It was a pair of black polyester trousers and a cream-colored turtleneck sweater. She only put on mascara and eyeliner because she had put the rest of her makeup in one of the bags she planned to throw away. She decided she wasn’t going to wear glitter on her face anymore, and when she realized how much of it she owned, she was appalled. Exactly how much money did all that make-up represent?

Juliet checked her email before she left to go shopping. She was amazed. There was a message from Seth.

“Hi Jules,” he started. “If you’re sitting in your dorm room sharpening wooden stakes, please remember that a normal person would die if you jabbed one through their heart. As for the rest, do whatever you need to do. Call for a walk when you’re ready. I’ll be waiting, Seth.”

Juliet thought of writing him back but decided against it. She didn’t have anything to say to him, at least, not until she became the woman who was good enough for him to bite.

Closing her laptop, she left to catch a bus.