Kevin huffed heavily while he darted through the crowd, looking for his bestie Ruse. There were so many people at Sparklecon, way more than he expected, even for a cultural hub like Japantown. What were all these people doing in Nebraska? Most outsiders thought Nebraska was a boring state, filled with farmland, tractors and corn, and didn’t much care to visit. And they were right for the most part! But people had seemed to come from all over to visit this little mid-western fluke of a town, and they were making it very difficult to make way through the convention.

Everything was set up outdoors, which was unfortunate for somebody as ghastly pale and susceptible to light as Kevin was. And, of course, it just so happened to be a bright and sunny day in the middle of June, and the only shade provided was for people operating merchandise booths with awnings. Even the shade trees behind those booths were huddled over by clusters of other convention attendees, leaving no room for Kevin’s bulk.

Kevin was wearing the same clothes from yesterday, and his sweat was caking to his skin, becoming liquid again, then drying and caking. This was normal for a gentle sir such as himself; the natural scent of a man was supposed to have alluring affects on the ladies, according to many a Reddit post he had consumed.

But it was still hot, and his glorious weight was hard to carry around all day in the sun. The brim of his fedora was his only reprieve, and the shade it created barely covered his eyes. He placed his hands on his knees and panted. He had been at Sparklecon for almost six hours, watching Ruse like a hawk, right up until she suddenly vanished without a word. “Ruuuuse,” he groaned. Where had she gotten herself off to? And why hadn’t she mentioned anything before wandering off? She must’ve found her ‘future wife’ Lulu...

His phone dinged.

He scrunched his face and reached into his shorts pocket, which was located under a roll of belly fat, for the device. At first, he assumed this notification was from Ruse, informing him of her whereabouts. However, usually the only correspondence he ever received from her was in text form, and that sudden ding was the sound of a social media private message. Strange.

He doubled-tapped the screen with a fat finger. It was a Facebook message.

You must be that beta male Kevin I saw on the news hanging out with my girlfriend Ruse. Here's a warning: you better back off because I'm on my way, and if I catch you with her, you will face consequences. I have plenty of tools at my disposal and you will regret this.

This ominous message was from a ‘Henry Kepler’. Kevin had never heard of any such guy, not from Ruse, not from anybody. Ruse was also quite homosexual, at least as far as he knew, and she made sure he was aware of this fact fairly often. So who did this rando think he was, calling her his ‘girlfriend’, and calling him a ‘beta male’? Kevin was clearly the alpha! He had made this other man jealous, after all!

But he didn’t like the idea of someone threatening to hunt him and his bestie down. He put the phone back into his pocket and continued weaseling his way through the convention crowd in search of Ruse. This message would probably scare her, but she had to see it, at the very least to confirm or deny its legitimacy.

The search took a few minutes, but after passing by a couple merchandise booths decked out with prop cosplay katanas and various art prints, and signs advising all attendees to wear deodorant and bathe, Kevin finally saw the tiny pink and brown figure of Ruse.

As he expected, she had found Lulu Sparklefest’s booth. It was a little bamboo stand with white shide streamers hanging from the top corners. The woman’s name was written in katakana on her booth sign with cardboard cutouts of pink, green and yellow dango on either side, and to Kevin it looked downright tacky. The ‘l’ and ‘f’ sounds were uncommon in the Japanese language, and it just messed up all that beautiful script. Lulu wasn’t even Japanese to begin with! She was Scandinavian or something like that! And all these little details were the tell-tale signs of a faker! Ruse deserved better...she deserved a real Japanese man. She deserved him!

A line of costumed people stood waiting behind Ruse, and Lulu looked flustered in her little white folding chair, but she appeared to be acting polite for Ruse’s sake. Ruse did have a large white paper bagful of frilly lacy pink Lulu merchandise with her, on the opposite side than her regular flowery bookbag purse, so perhaps the politeness was due. Kevin rudely cut the line to approach his bestie.

He grabbed Ruse’s shoulder, which made her startle and whip swiftly around with her hands up in a fighting pose. As he scooted back to give her space, the banjo on his back made a soft hum.

“Oh…konnichiwa, Kevin-san,” Ruse said, lowering her hands and sighing with relief. She was wearing a pastel pink cable knit sweater that hung around her shoulders by two thin black straps. And it was one of those loose, baggy sweaters too, the kind that could make a man’s heart stop. On her cheeks were foil stickers shaped like hearts and stars she had probably scored from another nearby booth. She was beautiful. Kevin could hardly prevent his jaw from dropping. Of course, he had seen her earlier, as he had been trailing her all day. Now, however, she was in her element, cheerful and bright. She was always the most pretty during outings like this...and he deserved her...

Ruse noticed he hadn’t yet given her a reason for this distraction. He was just standing there, looking dumb. “Is there a reason you’re interrupting my conversation with the greatest cosplay seamstress of our time?” Ruse winked in what she hoped was a charming way at the confused booth operator.

Kevin shook off the butterflies. “Yeah…” he said, gritting his teeth uncomfortably. “I got a message from somebody…”

“And what does that have to do with Lulu?” Ruse asked, rolling her eyes.

Kevin bit the inside of his cheek and purposely eyeballed the surrounding convention guests, hesitating to explain further.

Ruse got the hint and turned back to Lulu and placed her hand on the booth tabletop. “I’m so sorry,” she apologized for Kevin’s behavior. “I’ll just be a second. Getting the opportunity to meet you means the absolute world to me!”

Lulu stared in the utmost bewilderment, but ushered the next fan in line to come forward as Ruse stepped aside.

Ruse led her big dumb bestie a few feet away from the booth to a spot in the grass with slightly less traffic than the rest of the convention, then put her hands on her hips. She did not have time for this. Her bags bounced against her elbows and her dangling pink heart-shaped earrings rattled gently as she tapped her foot in impatience. “Well, the message?” she asked snappily. "This better be good ‘cause I’m not cutting this opportunity with Lulu short.”

Kevin whipped his dinky black phone back out of his pocket and unlocked it, then handed it to Ruse with the message he had received still on the screen.

Buzz! Ba-ding!

There now also appeared to be a photo added right beneath the message. It was a bathroom mirror selfie of a black man with long tied-back dreadlocks wearing a police uniform and holding a firearm. No doubt, this was ‘Henry Kepler’.

And at this, Ruse’s face immediately dropped. Her bag of frilly pink convention goodies slipped out of her hand and fell onto the grass with a crumpling thud. A few people in line glanced over their shoulders at the noise.

Kevin stepped forward to act like a shield between Ruse and the other convention attendees. “Do you know this guy?” he asked with as much concern as he could muster. He had only ever seen her this shaken once before, when they first met…

Ruse was trembling with uncertainty, eyes kept on the ground. She looked like she really didn’t want to respond. But she did. “I…used to date guys…before I knew I was gay,” she quietly spoke. She hoped she would never have to tell anybody about this... “Henry is my ex-boyfriend from uni…”

There was a brief silence, when all that could be heard was the sound of conversation from the nearby booths.

Kevin then exclaimed, “you used to be normal?!”

So much for the supportive-friend-type he was going for.

Ruse glared at him; what a crude reaction to her reveal!

...Then again, this was brand new information to him; information contrary to what she had allowed him to know about her past. She probably just blew his mind. Maybe she could give him a pass for being ignorant just this once... She picked her merchandise bag back up from the ground and held it over her front, her new coat of pink nail polish glittering in the sun. Why did she have to make that comment yesterday about needing protection from creeps? She had jinxed herself. And how stupid had she been earlier that morning while that Japantown news crew filmed their live morning segment?! She was probably in multiple shots! She had brought this upon herself by not thinking! So stupid! “Nothing about dating Henry was ‘normal’,” she quietly grumbled. And nothing would go back to normal until he was back out of her life. “Let’s…get away from the crowd…”

Kevin agreed with a short ‘hai!’ and offered Ruse his large flabby arm. She linked her tiny twig of an arm around it. He dwarfed her significantly at six foot three to her five foot five, and he knew she liked that about him, that his size and demeanor made her feel safe.

The two friends escaped the bustle of the convention onto a patch of green grass behind a row of booths. There was a large stage slowly being put together in that area for a singing competition happening in an hour or two, but it was still far enough away from the noise of attendees.

Ruse sighed, which didn’t relieve any of the tension from her voice. She both looked and sounded like she had just had the worst flashback of her life. And to her, it sure felt that way… But Kevin was clearly keen for her to explain what was going on, so… “I didn’t want you to find this out about me for…reasons…”

He cocked his head, unsure of what those ‘reasons’ could possibly be. Somehow, regardless of being single his entire life, he had managed to remain very confident and positive that he was quite the catch. That all his gross and weird and creepy habits were instead charming and gentlemanly. He had no idea any woman, straight or not, in a hundred-mile radius would rather be forever alone than be the object of his affections. And Ruse knew that if he knew that she wasn’t a gold star lesbian, he would take that information like it was some sort of in. She had to lie, or he’d never leave her alone! And he was already too clingy as it was!

“Nevermind…” she told him. She couldn’t bare to hurt his feelings with brutal honesty. She had to explain herself now though, since Henry had blown her cover, the bastard. She took a deep breath…and started her explanation with a pout. “Here’s the truth: I moved to Japantown to get away from him. Henry scared me. He was controlling and manipulative and just—a complete asshole!” She balled her fists and struck them out to her sides with a frustrated stomp. This was supposed to stay buried in the dark recesses of her mind forever! She hated Henry for this! “He wanted me to be his little trad-wife,” she continued, though it was clear just talking about it was upsetting her. “He kept trying to control me, kept trying to tell me what I could and couldn’t do, what classes I could attend, what I could and couldn’t spend money on…” The discomfort in her voice mounted with each grievance. “He even got to decide who I could or couldn’t speak to…” She refused to meet Kevin’s eyes as she explained herself. The initial shock of the situation was turning into guilt. Guilt for keeping her best friend in the dark all this time. “I know I should’ve said something earlier, but I didn’t think it would come to this! I thought I was doing so well at lying low...I mean, if you didn’t know, then you couldn’t tell anybody else about me, and nothing would get out. But it got out anyways because I’m such a fucking dummy!”

Kevin looked mildly puzzled at her explanation. “I wouldn’t have ratted you out,” he said, feeling kind of hurt that she would think that. Rat her out? Nah. But if he knew she had been with men before, he would’ve tried harder to prove himself to her! On behalf of all the nice guys! And he knew he still wasn’t getting the whole story...

“It’s not like that—I was just being extra cautious.” She started pacing, and this meant she wasn’t finished talking. “He probably knows where I live now, especially if he’s a cop. Look at that stupid picture…”

Kevin didn’t have to look again, though. One look at that trashy failed thirst trap selfie was more than enough.

Ruse was now doing small laps in the grass. When she stopped for a moment, she finally looked up at Kevin with immense fear in her big black coffee eyes. “What should I do now? Where am I supposed to go? I sure as hell can’t go home!”

“Hey—” Kevin placed his hand gently under her chin. He could feel her heartbeat pounding away from her anxiety.

She looked at him feebly.

Trying to be brave for her, even though he knew she wasn’t telling him everything, he continued, “I won’t let anything happen to you. ‘Tis the gentleman’s code to protect m’lady!”