Darkness of hell.

Nightmares that never seem to end. 

Hatred for a world unwilling to give.

The pain of being destroyed piece by piece.

A system that is broken in every way.

I find peace in the realms of my creation because my world, my life, is slowly falling apart. 

And no matter what I do, there's no stopping it. 

I know I’m capable.

I know I have what it takes. 

I just can’t keep getting back up and brushing it off. 

I can’t keep living the way I am. 

I’m exhausted.

And I don’t have the control to change it. 

And that scares me. 

I don’t care what the world sees when they look at me. 

But the fact that I can’t look at myself and see something I like, that I can’t handle. 

The expectations I have for myself are self breaking. 

I tell myself that working harder will fix it all.

That I’ll do better next time, not because I believe it wasn't my best but because it wasn't good enough. 

Next time I’ll do better. Next time it'll be perfect. 

I break myself into pieces over singular mistakes. 

Tear myself apart over the smallest things. 

And you know what? 

I truly believe that working myself to death is the way to go. 

It's ridiculous, I know. 

I just can’t see another way.

Darkness of hell.

Nightmares that never seem to end. 

Hatred for a world unwilling to give.

It's a never ending cycle. 

But I'm still fighting. 

I will never stop fighting.