“Alright, everyone grab a bag and wait until your names are called,” Captain Miller said.

Colt went to the row of identical duffel bags, eyeing them carefully. For the next 24 hours they’ll experience survival training. It’s basic training for Hawks so Wolves had to endure it too.

Their goal was to use the resources in their bags to make it to a hidden cabin in the woods, retrieve vital information and get to the rendezvous point. There were many unknowns in this mission, including what was in the bags everyone randomly chose, where the cabin is and the end point. And what the information looked like. It could be stowed on a laptop or stuck to a painting for all they knew. The idea was for them to formulate a plan as they went along, showing not only their physical prowess, but their improvisation and problem solving skills. 

As lessons went, it was interesting and Colt tensed as he strained his eyes at the various bags as if he could see what’s inside by sight. 

“Just choose one, Saunders. You won’t know what’s in it no matter how hard you try,” Miller snapped.

Colt chose one and went to the edge of the clearing, waiting for his name to be called. They’ll be split into pairs and Colt prayed he’d get Haines, or even Aaron. They were both good to work with. Unlike Colin who, while he did listen occasionally, always spoke in a sneering tone. And of course, anyone was better than Nick. Especially the last few months.

Colt’s eyes flicked to Nick and saw him standing on the opposite side of the clearing, clutching his bag. Colt sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. Nick changed since he attacked him months ago. While Colt thought he was an ass before, now he was just an annoyance. He avoided Colt as much as possible, which was hard since they were on the same team, causing a lot of mishaps. Just the other day they were in the lab testing DNA samples and Colt handed Nick a test tube. Nick recoiled while trying to take the tube and ended up dropping it. They got yelled at and an F for the class. His first F ever. Colt was not happy.

While Nick crossed a line that night in trying to subdue him, Colt’s opinion of the Alpha wasn’t worse than before. After all, Nick wasn’t the first Alpha to try and break him. Most Alphas relied on their physicality to subdue Colt, but when he appeared unaffected, they didn’t know what to do. How do you break someone when he defies the norms? Most resorted to violence, which usually backfired as Colt would kick their ass. Luckily, Nick backed off because Colt doubted the fragile Alpha’s pride would have allowed him to work alongside Colt after getting a beat down. Not that Nick’s current behaviour was any better. 

They only had a few months of training left. After that, he’ll have a partner he can work with, and will interact with Nick as little as possible. 

“Saunders and Chambers.”

 Colt started and his eyes widened. He looked at Nick and saw the same look of horror on his face. As soon as Miller finished rattling off the names on his list both men rushed to him.

“Sir, with all due respect you can’t pair me up with him. He’s useless,” Colt said in a hurried and, he was ashamed to say, desperate voice.

“Sir, I know it must be fun for you to have us work together, but you can’t leave me with him for two days. We’ll kill each other,” Nick protested in an equally frantic voice.

“Good, maybe that’ll knock some sense into both of you.”

Nick and Colt froze. “You want us to kill each other?” Colt asked hesitantly.

“Kill each other. Love each other. I don’t care. But the situation with you two has gotten ridiculous. You’re both in the running for the Wolf team and there will be times you’ll have to work together. Let me put it this way boys, you either succeed together or you die together. Either way, this is going to get settled before we head back to base tomorrow night.” Miller was about to walk away then stopped, and smiled sadistically, “If you guys make it back.”

Colt swore both he and Nick shivered as Miller walked away laughing.

Great, now what? Colt tilted his head up slightly to look at Nick and noticed how lost the Alpha looked. This restored some of Colt’s confidence. “Want to find a spot and go through our bags?”

Nick nodded mutely and they walked away from the group. They sat down and carefully lined up all the stuff in their bags. Colt felt elated as he pulled out energy bars, a bottle of water, sunscreen, a small pot and a pocket knife. 

“Jack pot. How bout you?” 

Colt looked at Nick’s stuff and groaned. The man really was useless. He had to pick the most inconvenient bag. Inside were a couple of textbooks, a frayed and dirty blanket, a compass, and an empty thermos.

“Hey, don’t point fingers at me. Colin picked this bag out for me,” Nick protested.

“I suppose you didn’t have it in you to actually decide for yourself?” Colt quipped back.

Nick glowered, “Whatever. We have to deal with what we have.”

“Fine by me. You’re the one who has to carry that around.”

If Nick wanted to reply Colt didn’t give him a chance as he pulled out the map from his bag’s front pocket and opened it. “Looks like the cabin we need is centrally located. We just have to figure out how to get to it from here.”

“Guess this is where my compass comes in handy,” Nick said with a smirk.

“Not until we figure out where we are.” Colt looked around, trying to find any landmarks then back at the map. “There’s a bunch of small rivers in the area. If we find one we might be able to figure out where we are.”

“Or get even more lost.”

Colt snapped. “Well if you have another plan I’m all ears!”

Nick mumbled, “Just saying.”

Colt sighed and rubbed his forehead. It was going to be a long day.

“Told you we’d get lost,” Nick said five hours later. Colt wanted to strangle him. With his bare hands. Or better yet, grab a branch and whack him with it till he’s unconscious. Taking a deep breath, Colt counted to five, grateful when he relaxed.

They’d walked for two hours before they found a river and spent thirty minutes arguing over which one it was, then followed the path Colt outlined, and now he wasn’t so sure anymore. But hell would freeze over before he told the Alpha that he was less than certain.

Mustering up his let’s-deal-with-this-like-adults smile Colt turned to Nick. “We’ve only been walking for a little while. We just need to keep going.”

Nick snorted, “If you don’t know just say so.”

“Like I’m going to tell you that,” Colt mumbled. Truth be told, Colt wasn’t sure where they were. He just hoped they would figure out something soon. How did the Hawk team do this?

They walked in silence for several minutes when Nick suddenly stopped. Colt was so distracted he bumped into him. “What the hell?”

Nick pointed at the ground. Colt looked and his blood froze. Paw prints. Giant paw prints. He swallowed and hoped his voice was steady, “Think it’s a bear?”

“Can’t think of anything else that would leave big prints. We should be careful moving forward. If it’s a mama bear and she has cubs, we don't want to get anywhere near them.”

Colt nodded and they continued walking, away from the prints. Several hours later, the sun started to set and Colt began to worry, checking the map again. Once the sun went down it would be harder to navigate. They should have found the cabin by now.

“We’re going the wrong way,” Nick said tonelessly.

“Yeah and you know this how?”

Nick nodded towards the sky, “Based on the sun, we’re heading more east than we should.”

Colt slumped, finally defeated, “I think you’re right.”

“Give it here.”

Wordlessly, Colt handed the map, surprised by how relieved he felt about relinquishing control for a few minutes.

Nick scanned it then nodded to the left, “This way.”

An hour later, the sun set completely, the stars shone and they finally found the cabin.

“Alright!” Colt exclaimed and he and Nick exchanged quick nods of triumph. They entered the cabin, checking for traps. After a thorough scan, they found an envelope taped to the bottom of a desk.

“Think this is it?” Nick asked.

“Hope so. We should get going. Much as I’d like to spend the night here, if we don’t get a move on we won’t reach the end point in time.”

“It’s not a good idea to go out at night though,” Nick interjected. “There are bears and wolves out there.”

“We’ll just have to be careful. Or are you too scared?” 

“Say what you want but I’m not going out there. I want to pass this stupid test as much as you do, but not enough to die for it.”

“You have that little faith in your ability to walk through the dark.”

“I don’t know if you have a death wish or if you’re just stupid. But it’s dangerous out there. Where’s your survival instinct?”

“Back on the base along with your spine I think,” Colt said, smiling broadly.

“This isn’t a joke, Saunders. If we face a wild animal out there we’re dead. We have no way to defend ourselves.”

“Fine, then you stay here. And when I reach the finish line I’ll tell Miller that you were too chicken to do what a Hawk would do. What a Beta would do.” 

Colt strode out and into the night. He thought Nick would stay behind but a few moments later he heard him whisper, “This is suicidal and you know it. Are you that eager to die for this mission?”

“We all joined knowing we were putting our lives on the line,” Colt replied flatly.

Nick was nonplussed.. “You’re serious. You’re prepared to die for all this.”

Colt’s eyes pierced Nick’s, “Yes.”

Two hours later Colt was rubbing his arms. While he didn’t mind walking all night, he wasn’t prepared for the sudden drop in temperature. It was spring but still chilly at night. He always hated the cold.

“We should stop for the night. Get a fire going,” Nick spoke for the first time in hours.

“No, we need to keep going. You said this is the right way, right?”

“I’m pretty sure.” 

Colt was about to question him further when he heard it. A low growl. He froze and Nick stood still, eyes wide. Slowly, Colt turned his head to look over his shoulder.

“Don’t move,” Nick whispered fiercely. “There are two wolves.”

“What do we do?” Colt whispered back. As much as he said he was willing to die, now that that moment appeared so close, he was very reluctant to have his life snuffed out.

“We need to climb a tree. There’s one on our left. Looks sturdy enough. I’ll give you a boost and you can pull me up.”

Colt nodded and the two slowly tip-toed to the tree. Once they reached it, Nick cupped his hands and Colt stepped into it, shocked when he nearly flew through the air by the strength of Nick’s thrust. He grabbed the closest branch and pulled himself up, then dangled his arm, “Come on.”

Nick was reaching his arm up when they heard the growl. Colt’s head snapped up and saw a wolf approaching Nick, his body tensed and ready to strike.

“Grab my arm now!” Colt screamed.

Nick jumped at the same time the wolf sprang forward. Colt’s jerked from Nick’s weight. He tried to pull Nick up but another force pulled him forward. The wolf was bitting Nick’s shoe and was trying to drag him back down. Gritting his teeth, Colt pulled with all his might and almost fell backwards when Nick’s body almost seemed to fly towards him. They sat on the branch, panting as they watched the wolf devour Nick’s shoe.

“We need to go higher,” Colt said.

Nick nodded and they quickly climbed as high as they could. They found adjacent branches and flopped back against the tree trunk, panting.

Suddenly, Colt felt an inexplicable need to laugh and began to chuckle.

“What are you laughing at?” Nick asked in a disgruntled voice. Colt looked over and when he saw Nick’s flabbergasted expression he couldn’t hold it in anymore and laughed wildly.

“You’re crazy.”

“Oh come on. Haven’t you ever had an exhilarating experience and laughed afterwards?” Colt asked.

“No.”

“Not surprised,” Colt drawled as he put his hands behind his head. “You don’t laugh or smile. Unless you’re busting my chops about something.”

“That may be true,” Nick replied weakly.

Colt raised his eyebrow in surprise. He hadn’t expected Nick to agree with him or look sad as he made his admission. Instinctively, Colt wanted to comfort the emotionally impaired Alpha.  “Well we can laugh about this.”

Nick snorted, “You’re the only one laughing here.”

“I’m serious. Picture this. Nicholas Chambers. The great Nick.”

“Where are you going with this?” Nick groaned.

“Bear with me. Imagine Nick Chambers, uber Alpha, walking back to the base...with one shoe.” Colt paused, watching Nick digest the image. “Funny right?”

Slowly, Nick began to smile. It wasn’t a wide smile, more a slight tilt to his lips but his eyes softened slightly. “Yeah I guess it’s kind of funny.”

Colt chuckled, “Told you. You have to see life as glass half full. Silver lining. Find the humor in a situation.”

“Is that what you do? Find the humor in a situation?”

“Yup. What’s the point of life if you can’t enjoy it?”

Nick was silent as he pondered Colt’s words. “I don’t know what the point of life is,” he said softly. His voice was so quiet Colt could barely hear him and he wasn’t sure he was meant to. Suddenly, Colt felt awkward, seeing Nick look so lost, as if he were intruding on his moment of weakness.

“Is that why you’re OK...with what I did?” Nick asked aloud.

Colt started. He hadn’t expected Nick to ask him about that and wasn’t sure how to respond. He had a quip ready about how he knew Nick didn’t have the balls to follow through but decided since Nick’s walls were down he might as well lower his a bit too. But only a bit.

“I wasn’t OK with it. You’re just not the first Alpha to try using sex to subdue me. Besides, you weren’t holding me down and I could have easily subdued you instead. For an attacker you really don’t know how to incapacitate your victim.”

Nick winced at the word victim and he realized that Nick actually might feel guilty about what he did. The thought was absurd and Colt was about to dismiss it when Nick shocked him, again.

“I’m sorry I did that. I don’t know why I did. I just… snapped.”

The apology was spoken so sincerely Colt didn’t know how to respond. When the silence stretched, Nick met his eyes with utter regret.

“Apology accepted,” Colt mumbled.

Nick nodded. “We shouldn’t sleep. The wolves will leave soon and if we sleep we might fall out of the tree.”

Colt agreed and tried to make himself comfortable, but not too comfortable. How long would they have to stay up here anyway?

“Hey, pass me one of those textbooks. It’ll keep me awake,” Colt smiled mischievously. “Looks like your bag might come in handy after all.”

Nick smiled and extended one of the textbooks. Their fingers brushed briefly and once again Colt felt Nick recoil. He’d already accepted the Alpha’s apology. Why was he still so skittish?

 As he opened the textbook, Colt reflected on all the new insights he had gained into his rival. In the year and a half they’ve known each other, Colt had never realized how calm Nick was in tense situations, or how caring he could be, chasing after a Beta he disliked to make sure he didn’t die or putting him first when trying to escape a wolf. 

Surprising as it may be, maybe he didn’t know the Alpha at all.