Flynn ripped off his shirt and threw it on the floor. His pants and underwear shortly followed. His heat had started an hour ago and already his body was burning up, the slick dripping down his legs.

He’d already called Damon and he was coming straight after work. He just had to hold on until then. Flynn tried to distract himself with one of his favorite shows and was on the third episode when Damon finally arrived.

“Damon,” Flynn panted, reaching his arms out.

Damon put his bag down and sat on the bed next to Flynn and hugged him. The feel of Damon’s shirt against his chest was too much for Flynn’s sensitive flesh and he tugged at the material.

“Take it off.”

Damon acquiesced, taking off all his clothes until he was completely naked. As soon as he sat on the bed again Flynn leaped on him, pushing him down and scenting his neck, mewling with pleasure at the familiar smell.

“Touch me,” he panted.

And he did. Over and over, just as Flynn craved. Damon gave all of himself, gave Flynn what he needed until his body cooled and he almost passed out, his heat once again over. He vaguely felt Damon pull out and was about to doze off when he heard Damon’s footsteps move across the room.

That’s strange. Damon didn’t come yet so where is he going? 

Mustering up some energy, Flynn followed Damon and heard a door close down the hall. Staggering and using the wall for support, Flynn made his way to the only closed door in the apartment and realized it was the bathroom. What was-? 

Then he heard it. The sound of Damon panting as he clearly finished himself off in the bathroom.

Suddenly, Flynn’s exhaustion faded, replaced by a strong sense of shock and betrayal. His body felt numb as he stood in the hall, listening to Damon climax. Still feeling detached from his body, he made his way back to the bedroom. He found his clothes strewn across the floor and put on his pants and shirt. Suddenly, he didn’t want Damon to see him naked anymore. He didn’t even want him to touch him.

Flynn heard Damon walking down the hall and turned to face him when he entered the room, taking in the shocked look on Damon’s face.

“I thought you were asleep,” Damon said weakly.

“Is that why you were jerking off in the bathroom?” Flynn asked, his voice accusing and furious.

Damon swallowed and looked away, shifting uncomfortably. Flynn absently noticed that he was fully dressed, meaning he was just going to leave, which fueled Flynn’s rage further.

“Do you always do that? Jerk off in the bathroom rather than come inside me? I told you I’m on the pill. I won’t get pregnant.” Damon didn’t respond, his eyes still turned away and Flynn snapped, “Do you?” 

Damon finally nodded, “Yes.”

Flynn world lost all color, all life. He began to sway and saw Damon reach out to him.

“Don’t touch me,” he barked and Damon froze, uncertain. “Here I thought we were both getting what we wanted,” he seethed, body burning now not from his heat or anger, but shame. He spat out the words from years ago. “Mutual sexual satisfaction. And now I find out you were just pitying me.”

“I wasn’t pitying you,” Damon said softly, his eyes beseeching Flynn to understand but Flynn’s mind was reeling too much to worry about how his friend was feeling.

“Oh that’s right. It’s not pity. You’re just doing your job as a Beta serving the great Hale family. You can take the servant out of the house but you can’t take the shitty sense of duty out of the servant.”

“Flynn,” Damon whispered.

“Is that why you never kiss me? You think I didn’t notice how you always blocked me when I tried. Or how you turn my body so we never look at each other. So that you can just think of it as you doing your duty and not actually making love to me.”

Damon swallowed and his eyes flitted away briefly. “Maybe.”

Flynn’s eyes dried as anger surfaced once again and he embraced it. He’d rather feel anything but this shattered feeling of loneliness and betrayal. He sneered, “Coward. You’re too scared that something may happen. That you might fall for me. But like I told you eight years ago I’m already in love with you! And just like back then when I asked you to run away with me, you’re chickening out now, hiding behind your role as a Beta.”

Flynn’s eyes searched Damon’s face, looking for any hints to how he felt and found nothing. He was completely blocking him out, again.

Suddenly, Flynn’s anger faded and he collapsed on the bed, “Why Damon?” Flynn rasped brokenly, tears filling his eyes, hugging his body to protect himself. Or stop from falling apart. “Why can’t you love me? Why can’t you fight for me?”

Flynn began to sob and felt Damon reach down and cup his face gently, wiping the tears from his eyes. Flynn looked up and saw the Damon he fell in love with, his childhood friend who always cared for him. The only one who made him feel special and valued. Like he mattered. Who saw him.

“I can’t,” Damon rasped. “Flynn, you say you love me but this can never work. You need an Alpha. You think I don’t notice how you always arch your neck and beg me to bite you. Or how you try to push me further in because your body needs an Alpha knot. You may love me, but as an Omega you need more. Your body knows that just as much as I do.” 

“I don’t need an Alpha,” Flynn said desperately. “I just want you. You’re all I ever wanted.”

Damon shook his head, still looking down at Flynn with despair in his eyes and it broke Flynn’s already bruised heart. “I’m not enough. A Beta isn’t enough.” 

“And you think I’m just going to find an Alpha?” Flynn asked with disgust, some of his anger returning and he brushed Damon’s hands away, suddenly wanting some distance between them. “Like it’s so easy to find a nice Alpha out there who won’t look down on me and mark me.”

“You know some nice Alphas.”

“Yeah, like where? The base? Like I’d be willing to mate with one of those arrogant jerks.”

“No, not the base,” Damon replied.

Flynn was about to respond when realization struck. His mind whirred as he began to think. No. It couldn’t be. Damon wouldn’t… He looked up at his best friend and saw the determined look on his face.

“Melissa?” Flynn rasped and Damon looked away, confirming Flynn’s suspicions. Flynn felt his entire body fuel with rage and stood up, his hands clenched at his sides as he stared at Damon who still wouldn’t meet his eyes.

“Melissa?” he screeched. “Is that why you introduced us? So that I would mate with her. Bond with her!”

“She’s an amazing Alpha,” Damon said and Flynn wanted to smack him.

“Get out,” Flynn hissed through clenched teeth. 

Damon finally looked up and reached out to Flynn but he slapped his hand away.

 “Get out!” he screamed. “I already have an entire family trying to control me and tell me how to live. I don’t need that shit from you.”

Flynn’s whole body shook with a mixture of rage, humiliation and despair, because he realized that he really never could gain Damon’s love. Damon would rather see him with someone else, had been plotting it for years in fact, than try and fight for him.

Damon bowed his head and left. Flynn heard the front door close and fell onto the bed, his body shaking and his breathing rapid. When he’d confessed his feelings to Damon years ago, it had been emotional and painful when he was rejected. He’d begged Damon to run away with him, to leave their families behind. But Damon had only shaken his head and explained that he couldn’t reciprocate his feelings.  He didn’t speak to Damon for a month but eventually realized that he needed his friend more than he needed to protect his heart. It took some time but they’d eventually fallen back into a comfortable relationship, as if Flynn’s confession never happened.  But he didn’t know if he had it in him this time.

The fact that their sexual encounters were so planned and precise made Flynn want to scream with embarrassment. There he was, in heat and out of control and vulnerable, while Damon was just focused on getting him off then taking care of himself. He felt so rejected and ashamed. Sinking onto the bed, Flynn gave into his despair and wept.

Damon walked down the street, uncertain of what to do or where to go. He’d hurt Flynn. Again. When Flynn confessed to him years ago Damon thought his dreams were coming true. He’d loved Flynn since they were kids. Loved his spunk, his smile, his optimistic views on life despite his family. And his strength. He was the strongest person Damon knew and he couldn’t help falling in love with him. 

But then reality came crashing down and he imagined the future they would have. If they decided to be a couple, Flynn’s family wouldn’t have stood idly by. They would have fired Damon’s parents and made sure they left the city. Flynn would have been locked up and forced to marry any Alpha the family found. And knowing them, they might have chosen a cruel Alpha on purpose, just to punish Flynn for loving a Beta.

No, Damon couldn’t do that to Flynn. He knew if he confessed his love, Flynn would be over the moon and just leap into their relationship without worrying about the consequences. He’d be so focused on their love and damn everyone else, thinking if they ran away together it would solve everything. But Damon knew life wasn’t easy and they might not survive on their own. They were only sixteen at the time. They couldn’t have made it on their own.

So Damon kept his distance. He tied up his emotions and guarded them closely so he’d never reveal his love for Flynn. It all got much harder when Flynn’s heats got worse when he was eighteen. Damon still shuddered when he remembered finding Flynn in an empty room in the house, writhing and in pain from his heat, desperately trying to hide it from his family.  

“Go,” Flynn had rasped. “This isn’t your problem and there’s nothing you can do.”

“I can’t just leave you,” Damon protested, wanting to envelope his love in his arms.

“Don’t you get it! The pills don’t work! Nothing works. I just have to ride it out. It’s not like I have anyone to help me.”

Then Damon said the words that would damn them both. “I can. I can help.”

Flynn stared at Damon in shock, “You’d have sex with me? Just to help me with my heats?”

Damon nodded and Flynn had curled his lips in anger, “No way. I’m not that desperate to accept pity from you.”

“It’s not pity,” Damon protested. “I have urges too, you know. Not as strong as an Alpha’s or Omega’s but I do have them. It would be good for both of us. You’d have someone to help you through your heats and I have a way to vent my sexual desires as well without finding a partner. I don’t have the time or energy for that, especially once I start med school. It’ll be a relationship of mutual sexual satisfaction. That’s it.”

Flynn continued to stare at Damon assessing his words and motives and Damon had sweated anxiously, worried Flynn would see through his lies.  Suddenly, another wave of heat hit Flynn and he’d screamed, his body twitching and Damon couldn’t take it anymore. He scooped Flynn into his arms and kissed him.

After that, their relationship as friends with benefits was solidified. But Damon knew he couldn’t hold his friend and not reveal his true feelings. So he set up some ground rules for himself. No touching Flynn when they weren’t in the bedroom unless it was necessary. No kissing, ever. It was too affectionate, too intimate. And he couldn’t bear to look at Flynn while they had sex. His face revealed all his love for his friend too much when he touched him. And if he saw Flynn’s face as he climaxed, knowing he was responsible for it, he probably couldn’t let Flynn go. And, while contraceptive pills were full proof as long as Flynn took them on the day, Damon didn't want to risk the chance of getting Flynn pregnant. 

But he knew the real reason he never came inside Flynn was because he couldn't bear to give a part of himself, to claim Flynn in that way, when he couldn't be his mate. 

When he’d met Melissa Damon felt it was a sign. She was an Alpha, came from a decent middle class family; she was smart, ambitious but not too ambitious and most importantly, kind and empathetic. She was perfect for Flynn. When they’d first met in their freshman year, Damon had been nervous, still struggling with his romantic feelings and decision to let Flynn go while balancing it with their new sexual relationship.  And Damon could tell Melissa liked Flynn, but she probably also recognized Flynn’s reticence and mistrust of Alphas, his desire not to settle down. She was biding her time, getting closer to the Omega until he was ready for a relationship. Which made Damon feel even more strongly that she was the perfect Alpha for Flynn.

 And now Flynn knew everything. Damon didn’t know what to do or how to proceed. Last time, it was Flynn who had finally sought him out after Damon rejected him. Somehow Damon didn’t think that would happen this time. So it was up to Damon to mend the rift between them. The question was how? And even more importantly, should he do so?