Chapter 17: You will never see him

They say that labor pain is equivalent to a broken rib but that can’t be true because what I’m feeling now is worse.

I’ve been in labor pain for the past six hours and it’s only getting worse.

It all started with a sharp pain in my back and then my water broke which meant it was time for the baby to arrive,

But I have to endure all of this alone because Raymond isn’t here.

Two days ago Raymond said that Camelia wanted to go to a nearby town to buy some clothes for her baby from a famous tailor who lives there.

Up until the last moment he kept telling me “I promise I’ll be back by noon tomorrow”.

'Liar!!' I screamed in my head trying to endure the pain.

It didn’t matter how many times I grabbed the bed sheet or tried to push when the midwife told me. The baby did not come.

I don’t know how many times I cursed Camelia and Raymond in my head.

The pain was driving me crazy.

I remember my mother always talking about the day I was born as one of the most joyful moments of her life, how she held me tight for the first time or how my father started crying even though my mother was the one who suffered all the pain.

After seven hours I started losing a lot of blood which made my maid worried that I might not make it.

Everyone was in a panic and I could see how much they pitied me because I had no one to support me in this difficult time.

But my pain ended when the baby finally arrived because the midwife warned me to push as hard as I could or else neither I nor the baby would survive.

I was about to faint but hearing the baby cry made me pull myself together.

I remembered the words I said to Raymond that day ‘I am not like your mother and I will never leave my baby alone’.

‘I want to see my baby’ I said to the midwife who was still shocked by the baby’s appearance even though she knew the truth.

After all she told me that she was a teenager when she helped her mother deliver Raymond’s brother.

“Here, madam” she said as I saw her hands shaking.

But I wasn’t as scared as she was. I had been preparing my heart every day for the previous months during my pregnancy.

Besides, the baby only has me, so I have to be strong for both of us.

I took him in my arms and held his little hands.

“He’s beautiful,” I said as my tears started falling again and I kissed his forehead.

A couple of hours later I heard the sound of a carriage wheel approaching so I sent my maid.

When Raymond got out of the carriage the maid stopped him.

I could see everything from my room .

He looked devastated when the maid told him, “The lady doesn’t want to see you in the house and threatened to kill herself if you tried to get close to her.”

Please tell her I want to meet her. I want to explain my situation face to face.

“I’m afraid that’s not possible,” she refused again.

The baby started crying in my arms and Raymond looked towards my room window.

I closed the curtains as quickly as I could.

“So when will I be able to meet the baby?” I heard him ask the maid.

Then she replied according to what I told her.

"You will never see him again...From today the lady forbids you to even come near the gates of the old house".