"So weak, and pitiful! Honestly,
Who does the Sweet and Sour Kingdom think they are attacking my kingdom, hmm? Do they
Even know who I am? I'm the Strawberry Shark Queen!
Everyone should know
That my kingdom is the most powerful of them
All! Well, looks like I'm going to be eliminating some weaklings
Now! This battle will be over in like ten minutes! I'll just
Douse some pepper gasoline and
Shoooooooo, dead!
Ohoho, dead as a ghost
Upon the Hills of
Red Radishes! All these weaklings who dare challenge my
Kingdom are underestimating me!
I know these little
Nitty bitty fiends come and
Go to try and attack thinking I'm about to reach my tenth loss and this land is collapsing! But that's just a lie we tell to trick people into underestimating us! They'll soon see we're
Definitely the strongest
Ones in all of Satiation Kingdom! We'll destroy all their towers and reach the top of the
Meal Fortress after we drain their vitality all to zero!
Ha! The conditions of winning Kingdom Warfare?
My, well, one: destroying at least ten of twenty towers, or defeating the enemy squad within a certain numbers of turns and of course, getting to the top floor of
Meal Fortress! Which, no one who has ever challenged me
Has ever gotten to the top of my Meal Fortress!
And they always get starved!
Well, that's how it'll go this time, too!
Haha! That's what
All these people get for daring to challenge me! I'm a Fruit Shark Demon, and
That Kingdom is a bunch of pathetic little dragons and other pitiful bunches!
Ah, I'm so excited to
Be able to crush them with the palm of my hands!
Uhoo hoo ho,
No one who has ever
Challenged me has ever beaten me! I am unstoppable!
Hmm, in fact, while rare, some challengers have died
On my kingdom grounds
For daring to challenge me
With a halfhearted resolve!
Ehehe, will these pathetic weaklings
All die today, too? They're on their ninth loss! You
Know what happens when you reach your tenth! I mean,
Look! Their kingdom
Is about to collapse, don't you see?
Now, if the Sweet and Sour Kingdom
Goes and asks, 'please let me
Sell my denizens to you, we're dying!'
I'm not taking a kingdom that attacked mine and
Lost to tell the tale!
Listen, they were pathetic to try and further their death
Knell of the collapse of their kingdom,
I'll happily oblige!
Let's get busy, and
Let's destroy
This kingdom for daring to challenge us,
Ha! They're going down,
Every single one of them!
My time has come to break some bones, and lay down the law!"
Toot, toot, toot.
Battle sirens blaring a group of six demons came rolling in on war tanks. Forty towers on the battlefield and big fork shaped fortress in the corner lowering its doors, the queen studied his opponents for the day, and he couldn't help but laugh and guffaw at the group off in the corner who dared to challenge him.
Jumping out of the first tank had been a short, dark skinned dragon woman with a skinny, hourglass figure. Split pink and black hair going down to her pencil thin waist, she adorned braids on both sides. Spicy curry hairpin, her purple dress adorned a print of curry with panther ears on it. This wimpy Spicy Curry Dragon dared to challenge him? She's gonna snap it two very soon!
Coming out of the second tank had been a plant demon with short, split brown and yellow hair pulled into a side ponytail that flowed across the wind. Pitch black lifeless eyes, their vines were everywhere. Even more pathetic button down dress with jalapeno burgers with arrows says borger next to them, he almost wanted to shoot them down already. What an unserious little demon they got here! This Jalapeno Burger Plant is about to get roasted.
In the third tank had been a short badger girl with short, orange hair, and dyed purple bangs. Small black ponytail on the side, her white face almost looked too furry. White dress with a ton of plums on it, he cracked his knuckles. Sour Plum Badger, hmm? More like Sour Bum Bader. But, no one was going to hear that joke, nope.
Floating onto the battlefield next had been a green skinned kraken with curly red hair that faded to brown as it reached the shoulders. Pitch black belly shirt with a chili dog on it, she had a cloth skirt that almost barely covered her. He almost laughed seeing this. Ha, this Chili Dog Kraken was already half dead anyway! He'll put her out of her misery!
Coming out together had been a short panda dragon man with short blue hair that barely reached past his chin, and a short panda dragon woman with short red hair and light brown pigtails. Man adorning yogurt hands, his wings had those stupid little boxes of their own. Open blue shirt, the female dragon had buffalo wings instead of hands. Red and pink dress with baked chicken on it, he almost wanted to launch an attack early. Ah, he sees, he sees, Sour Yogurt Dragon, Buffalo Wings Hydra.
Bunch of losers.
"Strawberry Shark Queen, your rule over Satiation Kingdom ends here!" Spicy Curry Dragon shouted.
"We challenge you," Sour Yogurt Dragon started.
"To a Kingdom Warfare Battle!" Buffalo Wings Hydra finished.
"We'll be gunning down your entire towers," Jalapeno Burger plant started.
"Just you wait!" Sour Plum Badger finished.
"So, come at thee!" Chili Dog Kraken cried. "It's time to battle!"
Toot, toot, toot.
Kingdom Warfare Start
Objective: Eliminate the opposing team's twenty towers and reach the top of the Meal Fortress. (Zero of twenty)
Or: Defeat all opponents and reach the top of the Meal Fortress. (Zero of six.)
Battle sirens tooting, the ruler readied for a swift, but quick victory. Ah, who did these people think they were messing with, hmm? Have they forgotten who he was? The Strawberry Shark Queen! The top of Satiation Kingdom for the past hundred years. Think they can beat him, hmm? But, as he thought such, a pitiful demon ran onto the battlefield.
"Wait, Your Majesty, please, allow me to join you in warfare!" the Panda Tomato Farmer cried. "I'm strong, I can--!"
"I thought I told you only the parliament can engage in Kingdom Warfare," Penguin Elf Apple reminded him. "Could you scram?"
"What do you mean? Red Pepper Demon is here, and she's not in this so called parliament," The Panda Tomato Farmer bit back. "Please let me--." Slam.
"Listen, kid, you're new here, so it seems you don't know the rules, do you?" Red Pepper Demon asked in a low tone. "Know your place, mmk?"
"Please, you have to let me fight! They're stronger than they look!" The Panda shook as he said such.
"Your Majesty, please consider adding the Panda Tomato Farmer to your arsenal," the Watermelon Jackal said.
"Maybe they'll prove useful?" the Cranberry Lynx devil asked.
Scribble, scribble, scribble.
|Just this once,| the paper said.
"Thank you, Your Majesty!" the Panda Tomato Farmer exclaimed.
Trmp, trmp, trmp.
Bam.
Two towers taken out by the enemy, the demon concentrated all his energy. Ah, these stupid morons, thinking they can attack during a strategy discussion. It was time for an early reminder of what kind of queen he was! It was time for a little poisonous strawberry magic. Three, two one.
Tail glowing behind him, a deluge of toxic, magical strawberries pelted upon the enemies and a few of their towers. Sword coming for the stupid curry dragon, they immediately looked weak. Or, did they, who knows? Dashing towards the meal fortress, his turn soon ended. Cranberry stepping up to the plate, her bright red rod soon dished it out to multiple towers, in an instant.
"Just because you attacked me with your little poison strawberry magic doesn't mean you'll win!" the Spicy Curry Dragon shouted. "Take this, curry beam!"
Crunch.
Two further towers taking a small dent, the royal was ready to rumble. Hmph, amateur, think that's enough to break his towers? Think again! Red Pepper Demon taking a deep breath, fiery pepper breath soon burned the stupid yogurt dragon a new one. Screeching, a ball of energy tried to shake the tables.
"Whoops! I took one of your towers, my bad!" the Sour Yogurt Dragon cried.
"Oh, did you now?" Penguin Elf Apple exclaimed. "You won't like what I'm about to do, then!" As she said such, she hopped into a tank. Boom, boom, buboom. "We're even now, wouldn't you say?!"
Towers Decimated: ten.
Floors of the Meal Fortress climbed: zero.
Half of the towers decimated, the ruler cracked his knuckles. It was time to climb this baby! Watermelon jackal angel floating upward, zippity zaps flowed through her with all her might. Seeds of electricity plopped down, multiple towers had been damaged aplenty. Everyone stunned, the royal had begun running. He'd show them how quickly he could get to the top.
But, as he had begun the ascension towards the top, he could soon hear half of his towers get crushed, in an instant. Stupid curry dragon flocking into the Meal Fortress, he was ready to spit on the ground she tried to walk on. Hiding some strength was she? It was time to snap that little pencil in half!
"Looks like I'm not so weak after all, hmm?" the Spicy Curry Dragon asked in a mocking tone. "Your kingdom is going down!"
Sword out, blades clashed against one another. Dumb little reptile able to outstand a slice or ten, he let out a laugh. Little strong, was she? Well, he was stronger, and he'd get to the top before she could even breathe! Swiping away with all his might, he was ready to finish this pathetic draconic loser any second now.
Boom, boom, boom.
"Tomato explosion!" the panda's pitiful voice cried out.
Crunch. Crunch. Crunch.
Large tomato bomb swallowing the right side up in no time, the royal almost dropped his sword. Excuse him, what, what was that just now? Curry dragon looking away, their back was for the taking. Slice, sharp edges piercing through their little hourglass back, brown blood decorated the fortress stairs. Continuing his ascent, he could hear shouts on the outside.
"That panda he just destroyed almost all of our towers!" Buffalo Wings Hydra cried.
"We only have one left!" Chili Dog Kraken cried.
Sword sliced through the badger before he could even blink, the queen giggled. Ah, these pathetic losers had the galls to challenge him? Look how weak they all were! So pitiful! Dashing up the stairs, he could hear one final attempt at a comeback raising up from the sky. Bam, cram, bam bam.
"I'll finish this!" Jalapeno Burger Plant shouted. "Jalapeno Hammer Smash!"
Crunch.
Hammer popping down a loud one, two towers had been knocked back, in an instant. Ha, think that's enough to get the rest of them, hmm? They had only eliminated eight of theirs, they only had one left! Hearing another tomato bomb soon come, he could hear their enemies cradle back and forth upon the ground.
"Our last tower is about to be toast!" Jalapeno Burger Plant cried. "We have to--!"
Boom!
"--Defeat it."
"Sorry, looks like we've defeated you!" Penguin Elf Apple cried.
Other enemies almost taken out of the picture, the demon kept on running. Top of the Meal Fortress soon reached, the queen tagged the flagpole. Strawberry flag waving in the air with a ferocious manner, he dashed down the stairs. Stupid curry dragon grabbed, they had soon been on the tower's ledge.
Yoink.
Splat.
Boom.
Final tower about to sing its swan song as a large tomato explosive blew the joint, the ruler let out a guttural laugh. Here comes the sweet, sweet, victory. But, as he was about to celebrate, he could feel a chill from behind his back. Icy shouts coming his way, a warning had soon come as everyone else but the curry dragon laid in defeat.
"Strawberry Shark Queen, I'll get my revenge on your kingdom for killing meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" the Spicy Curry Dragon echoed.
Crunch.
Starved.
Defeated challengers accepted defeat, cleanup had soon been in action. Dump, splash. Little hourglass disposed of, the demon gazed at the pitiful meek panda. Those bombs of his sure came in handy. Maybe he would be a worthful asset to his team after all. He could use him on his defense team, maybe. Scribble, scribble, scribble.
|You know what, panda, you're useful. Welcome to my bastion.| the paper said.
"Huh, really? Thank you, Your Majesty!" the Panda Tomato Farmer cried, bowing. "I'll do my best to help you win all your battles going forward!"
Returning to the palace, the queen returned to his private quarters. Firing up the good old magical picture box, those dumb old magic shows played on reruns. Filing his cuticles, he let out a little scoff. This new farmer of his, he wasn't so weak after all. Perhaps, he could help him destroy more rivaling kingdoms! Kicking back, the guffaws continued until sleeping hour.
Things are about to get more interesting around here.
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