I wiped the splattering of blood on my palm across the vibrant green grass scattered around. Slowly I uncurled from my hunched position and sat back against the grand oak tree behind me. As I did so, gazing through my still teary vision at the surrounding landscape, I was floored with reverence at the beauty in front of me.

It was as though I was seeing everything for the first time. The evening sun shimmered in the distance in a multitude of orange, pinks and purples, reflecting upon the slowly flowing stream below that held not a wave or ripple in sight. It was a sight I had become more and more familiar with over the past few months. Yet until today, I had never truly noticed just how beautiful it could be.

The town I had called home spanned far across the horizon with no end in sight, hidden in the shadows of the setting sun. It amazed me how such a small place, a place that was minuscule in comparison to the wider world, was able to contain all I had ever known. Every person I had met, every place I had been, every memory I held. It was with such a thought I wondered for a moment whether I should have taken my dad's offer to go travelling around the world. To experience all that the world had to offer; At least once.

'No matter.' I thought with a shake of my head. There was no point fantasising about what could have been. A lesson I had learned proficiently over the past few months.

I leaned back further into the rugged brown oak tree behind me, a behemoth of a tree so wide it would take five people just to wrap their arms around it. The occasional dull green leaf cascaded down from above, dancing in the wind as it slowly dropped to the floor before getting lost among the sea of already strewn leaves. Though it was clear from the sight of its barren, long, thick branches that not many more leaves would be making such a journey.

I looked around from the grassy verdant hill I sat upon. Once again I marvelled at the picturesque scene displayed before me and wondered how I had never noticed it before. The way the land stretched below was filled with a symphony of flowers ranging from burning red to bright white in colour, all beautiful in appearance. The way the rare butterfly and bee were able to be seen rushing from one to another as they flowed and danced along the breeze. The way the long stretches of grass waved from to and fro In motion with the wind. It was all so beautiful.

Unfortunately, as was the story of my life, nothing could ever stay perfect for long. Case and point, as I sat there staring at the world around me as the sun continued to set, I could feel a sense of foreboding build within me as the pain in my chest, Something which had become a constant companion, began to strengthen with each rapid heartbeat. I raised my fist to my mouth as I did my best to stifle the groans threatening to escape with each shallow breath I took. Thankfully, this time the pain didn't last long, starting to subside after only a moment and allowing me to let out a long sigh in relief. Yet though the pain was gone the sense of foreboding and doom I felt was still very much present. Hanging over me like a guillotine and sending an icy chill along my neck that left me in a state of constant unease.

"You alright mate? You know, besides the obvious."

I looked over to my side to see the figure of my best friend lying down on the grass beside me. His eyes, a deep shade of brown so dark they were closer to black, opened wide and staring directly into mine as an awkward smile hung from his lips and he scratched the back of his head, causing his hair to stick up at awkward angles. Sam, or as his birth certificate stated Samael, had been my best friend ever since kindergarten with the two of us being nigh inseparable for the past twelve or so years. If it wasn't for how different we looked I'm sure most people would have thought us to be brothers.

When it came to appearances we were polar opposites. Unlike Sam's pitch-black hair which was short and curly, mine was long, scruffy and blonde, coming to a rest at my eyes and needing to be constantly moved and pushed out of the way. While Sam possessed a pair of dark brown eyes, mine were a deep, heavy green. And while Sam had a healthy, glowing tan, I was a deathly pale; almost translucent in appearance. That however was something that hadn't always been the case, having recently gotten worse over the past couple of months.

"Earth to Adam, you there?" I snapped out of my stupor with the sudden flailing of Sam's arm directly in my face, almost making me collapse backwards into the oak tree in surprise.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm still here," I responded, haphazardly slapping his arm away to his amusement.

"What were you so busy thinking about?"

'Where to begin.' I thought with a self-deprecating chuckle. My mind had been a mess for a while now. Causing me to spend most of my days constantly lost in thought, swaying from one extreme emotion to another.

I thought about telling him the news I received only a week ago for the hundredth time that day before once again deciding against it. I wasn't so sure why I couldn't tell him, it wasn't as if I didn't trust him explicitly, or that he didn't know the gist of everything already. But for some reason, as I stared into his piercing brown eyes, I just couldn't do it. Instead I plastered a large,  fake smile onto my face. 

"Nothing man, nothing at all. Just... thanks for being here with me. It means a lot."

Sam's smile immediately lowered upon hearing my words, his face turning sorrowful as his eyes glazed over. "Don't worry about it, man." As he spoke he patted my back, his strikes extremely gentle; Barely more than taps. As if I was made of glass.

Silence once again enveloped us as we went back to watching the environment around us as the sun continued to set. Well, I assumed that was what Sam was doing. I was once again getting sucked into my thoughts about what was coming. Despite everything that had happened it still felt so surreal, as if I could wake up at any moment and everything would just go back to the way it was. Alas, I knew that wasn't true.

There was so much I was going to miss. Sam with his constant support and shitty humour. If it wasn't for him I don't even want to begin to think how I would have ended up these past couple of months. Though If I had to guess, probably six feet under. I couldn't have asked for a better best friend. A better brother. Then there was Helen, Susan, my father, each one of them I was going to miss so very much. If only it didn't have to end.

Out of nowhere a familial tickle formed within my throat. A tickle that within moments suddenly grew into a gigantic coughing fit. One that left me paralysed, hunched over myself against the tree as tears began to form in my eyes and the pain that I had long since grown used to and was ever present grew in magnitude. My spit and tears crashed below against the dying leaves. Soon joined with a bright red liquid after only a few moments and a particularly harsh cough.

I looked down, seeing the way my blood glistened back at me. How it perfectly contrasted against the dark green of the leaves and seemed to almost shine as the setting sun hit it, making it look like a collection of tiny rubies. However, I was soon distracted as the pain quickly became unbearable as it coursed through my body and left me wanting to scream out in agony. Yet the only thing I could think about was not the pain but the eerie and foreboding sense of dread I had felt all day and the way it only seemed to get stronger as the seconds passed. As if I was on the edge of a cliff, only one step away from certain doom.

After what felt like hours, but must only have been a few minutes, my coughing finally resided. The first thing I noticed as the pain washed away was the large hand pressed firmly against my back, moving in a slow and circular pattern. I looked over towards Sam, noticing how he was no longer laid back and relaxed against the tree. Instead resting beside me on his knees with a stoic expression that held not a glimpse of surprise or shock.

"That was a bad one wasn't it?" I wheezed out as I smiled towards Sam, attempting to get rid of the sombre silence that had taken over.

Sam paused. I could see how his jaw tightened as he held himself back from what he wanted to say before he released a long sigh. "Yeah, yeah it was." 

His reply was muted and with no emotion as he laid back against the tree and gazed back out into the distance. An action I soon followed after composing myself and wiping away the remnants of blood and saliva I found on my hands and chin against the leaves and grass once again. I felt the cool hard bark dig into my back as I went back to observing the setting sun, continuing to think about my life and how it got to this point once again. I let out a small sigh as I gazed at the now almost-set sun and darkness began to surround us. It was truly a beautiful sight. It was such a shame it wouldn't last.