Conflicted Emotions

Chapter 14

Im Hyun was completing his assessments before hanging out with Do-yoon the next day. He looked forward to showing Do-yoon around Seoul, especially the free attractions to visit and enjoy a vanilla iced coffee at his favorite coffee shop. 

He was thinking of bringing Do-yoon to his apartment to spend the night with him over the weekend. 

Do-yoon, at the same time, was busy helping Song in the garden. They were trimming and reshaping the topiary plants near the wide metal gate. It’s been a tough day going up and down the ladder, as he transferred all the trimmed plants to the compost bin that Song placed not too far from him.

While Joon-Ho was reading some incoming reports from the XY company sent by his secretary. He was disappointed with the sales report gathered from the last 6 months, as he hadn’t been working with them. Some departments were not doing their jobs well, and some managers and supervisors were discontented with how Kang Yi-Joon managed the establishments. 

The performance appraisal was very low and incompetent. Yet the entertainment industry has a good percentage of sales. It’s still not enough to cover the loss after Cho Ji-Hwan pulled out his 30% shares in the company.

He pulled the handrims of his wheelchair away from the desk and massaged his nape with such distress on his face. Should I go back to Gangnam? That's what he thought. He pushed the handrim toward the open sliding door. As the curtain waved down before him, the first person he saw was Do-yoon. 

He was trimming one of the topiary plants. He was wearing a cap and a towel wrapped around his neck. He wore cotton gloves while holding the hedge shears and sitting on the top ladder. His white cotton shirt was stained with dirt, and his pants were stuck with trimmed leaves and pieces of cut stems. 

At that moment, Joon-Ho’s pounding chest felt suddenly relieved. He imagined himself being with him…just the two of them. 

Walking in the garden. 

What will it feel like if Do-Yoon is to stay by his side? Will he be able to see it through to the end?

When he asked for help, he looked like a lost puppy that needed an owner to look after with. He was naive…and innocent that anyone would take advantage of him. 

He was someone who came from a different world, who wanted to survive in a cruel place. But his gaze was spirited and pure. 

And because of that, he changed me little by little.

There were times when I no longer thought of Han Na-ri. And I kept thinking that I was just… feeling so lonely. I needed someone to comfort me. 

To ease my pain. 

Losing the person I love, my first love, wasn’t easy to forget. Joon-Ho looked around his surroundings. This house was the only memory of her…I have left. Then he looked back at Do-yoon with such calmness on his face.

So what does Do-yoon even mean to me?

He heard Song calling Do-yoon and waving. He pushed back the handrim from his wheelchair away from the sliding door.

I just… pity him and that’s all…there is.

―and left his office.

After Do-Yoon helped Song, he returned to his room to shower before heading back to the kitchen to help them prepare dinner. But when he opened the door, a shopping bag was in front of his door.

He took the bag. Huh? What’s this?

He peeked, and a card was inside. They were a pair of clothes and white sneakers. 

He read the note.

“I look forward to having fun with you tomorrow, Do-yoon ssi - Im Hyun -”

Do-yoon curled a sweet smile on his face. He put the clothing bag on his bed and left his room. The corridor sounded so quiet, and only his footsteps could be heard down the stairs. 

The first floor was filled with tranquility as the soft air wafted from the vent. 

Tap, tap, tap.

He opened the door to the kitchen. His eyes jolted by surprise as Yu-Na held his face and made his lips pout.

“Ah, ah, Un-nie.” Do-yoon struggled to get away from her.

“Come on, tell me,” Yu-Na looked persistent. “Are you dating Im Hyun?”

Song spewed out his drink, looking shocked, and reacted, “What?!” And so did Kim Lou. 

Yu-Na glanced back at Song and said, “You don’t know?”

“How would I know?” Song wiped the table with a tea towel.

She let go of Do-yoon’s face and looked intensely. “Spit it out, Do-yoon ssi. Are you dating Im Hyun?”

“No.” Do-yoon’s firm reply.

“But he asked you out, right?” Yu-Na folded her arms, tapping her left foot impatiently. Do-yoon wrote it down on the pad and showed it to them.

“Yes. He asked me out. He said he has two movie tickets and wanted to watch it together. He’s also going to show me around the city.”

“I have never been to Seoul. So I said yes to him. And what do you mean by dating?”

Do-yoon had no idea at all. 

Yu-Na slapped her forehead in disbelief at how dense Do-Yoon is. She said, “You know that…Im Hyun is an alpha, right?” Do-yoon bobbed his head. She continued, “And you’re just…going out with him? Without precaution?” She said in an annoyed tone.

Do-yoon looked scared, which Song noticed.

“Ya! Yu-Na ssi, can’t you see you’re scaring him?” Song said. “Can’t you let the kid go and let him taste a bit of fun? I don’t think Im Hyun will do something foolish to him.” He was waiting for dinner.

Yu-Na heaved a long sigh, letting her frustrations slip away.

“Un-nie,” said Do-yoon in a soft tone. Yu-Na took out her cell phone and asked, “Do you know how to use a mobile phone?” Song was watching. Do-yoon shook his head. Yu-Na sighed again. She thought, What am I going to do with you, Do-yoon? You really are―Ugh, never mind. Her brow twitched in frustration. 

Song knew that Yu-Na was trying to protect Do-yoon from being taken advantage of by his innocence. 

Yu-Na’s face looked serious. She said, “Don’t hate me, Do-yoon. Unnie just…wanted you to be safe,” in a concerned tone. “Seoul is a big city, and you might get lost. So it’s better to keep this handy with you, for emergency reasons.” She breathed through her lungs. “I’ll teach you how to use this, here.” She showed Do-yoon how to use the cellphone.

She showed him how to unlock, answer a call, put the phone on silent mode and disable it. “If you need to call us, press# 2. It will direct the call to Song. Do you understand?” She said.

Do-yoon dipped his head as he stared at the mobile phone. He never had one before. So this is a mobile phone. He sweetly grinned.  

And Yu-Na added, “Keep that in your pocket at all times. Never take it out, even if you go to the toilet. Understood?” 

Do-yoon bobbed his head like a pup.

Song looked dazed at them. I can’t believe what she’s doing with Do-yoon. Poor kid. You have a very possessive and overprotective Unnie. He shook his head before leaving them alone in the kitchen.

Saturday was a vibrant, sunny day to spend a sweet date with someone. Im Hyun was waiting at the main door for Do-yoon to come down when Yu-Na and Song came to see him.

“Woah, Im Hyun ssi, is that you?” Yu-Na was amazed at his simple and attractive get-up.

He wore a loose black denim jacket with pockets on his chest. A white breathable shirt tucked, ripped black jeans, and white sneakers. His hair was down. Yu-Na didn’t notice that he looked more appealing than when wearing his navy blue scrubs inside the house. 

He scratched the back of his head. He smiled, looking shy. “Do I look alright?”

“You do. But where’s Do-yoon ssi?” Song looked around when Do-yoon came down the stairs. 

Joon-Ho happened to come out of the elevator to his left. His eyes widened in surprise when he saw Do-yoon before his eyes. He looked neat in his casual clothing and was beautiful in his gaze. His heart palpitated for something he had once…felt before.

Do-yoon wore a denim jacket that fits well on his body figure, a loose cotton cream shirt untucked, and ripped blue jeans that go well with his white sneakers. 

His aura was mesmerizing in Im Hyun's eyes. They didn’t notice Joon Ho was hiding behind the round, tapered, plain column.

“Oh my goodness! You look so pretty, Do-Yoon ssi,” Yu-Na looked so happy as he smiled and approached them.

He fidgeted his fingers against the end of his jacket. He said, “Ah, Ah, thank you.” He shyly said. 

And he stared at Im Hyun, who looked inspired.

“You looked great, Do-yoon.” They exchanged smiles with each other. He added, “You’re going to like Seoul.” Im Hyun said and beamed a grin. “Let’s go, Do-yoon ssi.” He grabbed Do-yoon’s left hand as they were to leave the house.

Yu-Na and Song were dumbfounded. Did I just see them…holding hands?

While Joon-Ho reached out his right hand toward Do-yoon’s back behind the post. Until his presence and scent disappeared from his sight. He mumbled, “Do-yoon.” His right hand slowly landed back on the right armrest of his wheelchair. 

But―he overheard what Yu-Na said to Song.

“I’m still worried about Do-yoon, Song-nim.” She said in a low tone.

“It’s his first time going out of the house. Let him have a little freedom to be happy, Yu-Na ssi,” Song added, “Don’t you trust him?” He sounded troubled at the same time.

“It’s not that I don’t trust him,” Yu-Na felt concerned. “But no matter how I calm myself, I couldn’t stop worrying about him.” She nibbled her right thumb. “I kept telling myself that Im Hyun is a good guy. But it bothers me if Im Hyun took his suppressant before leaving.” She was anxious.

Song had forgotten for a moment that Im Hyun was an Alpha. And they never knew when his rut was coming. He was tongue-tied. 

And Joon-Ho’s eyes grew wider. Why didn’t I think about it? Im Hyun is an Alpha. Why did I let Do-yoon leave the house with him? I know he’s an impaired recessive omega. But he does release his pheromones unnoticed. His blood rushed through his veins as he clenched his fist. What if Im Hyun goes into a rut in the middle of their hangout? He tightened his jaw. Will he be able to handle it? And what if Im Hyun marked him? What will happen then?

He seethed in anger. Dammit! I should not have allowed him to leave the house. He came out from the plain, tattered column. And pretended that he got out of the elevator. But his nerves were boiling. Deep inside, he wanted to leave the house and bring Do-yoon back.

Song saw him and said, “Good Morning, Sir Lee.” he added, “Did you have a good sleep?” He smiled.

Yu-Na bowed and greeted him as well. 

“I heard some noise. What was it about?” Joon-Ho feigned ignorance that he knew nothing of the day they went out.

Song scratched his left chin. He said, “Oh, Do-yoon and Im Hyun just left to visit Seoul and watch a movie.”

“Did Im Hyun say what time they’re coming back?” Joon-Ho asked. But his ego was getting mad. He felt furious with himself that he wouldn’t be able to protect the person who became the sedative for his emotional pain. 

“Now that you asked, Sir Lee, Im Hyun didn’t say when they’re coming back,” Yu-Na said. Her heart raced, and her eyes were stunned. Is he planning to spend the night with  Do-yoon in the city? Ugh! I’m so stupid! Yu-Na screamed within her thoughts. 

“Don’t worry, we left your phone with Do-yoon ssi," Song said. "He’ll call us when something happens.” His eyes curved into ease. “Their grown-ups and Yu-Na taught Do-yoon how to use the phone.”

“Alright,” Joon-Ho turned around and said, “Let me know if something happens.”

Yu-Na and Song looked at each other. Are we hearing…right? 

Joon-Ho went inside his office. 

The door closed. But his silent anger outburst as he punched his legs several times. He was livid and eager to stand up and chase Do-yoon. His chest tightened as a scowl darkened his face.

The imbalance of his pheromones started to trigger his senses. He gritted his teeth. He pushed the wheelchair’s handrims towards his desk. He opened the first drawer to his left, looking for his suppressants. He took 2 doses to ease the phantom pain. 

He panted. 

His hands were trembling.

He felt an electric shock running through his veins toward his feet. He clasped his right hand against his chest, huffing with cold sweats. Fuck! 

He was grumbling.

Minutes later, he calmed down. He grabbed his phone from the table and called Park Beom.

Park Beom was talking with a secretary at a nearby coffee shop. His phone rang. He looked at his phone. He smiled back at the secretary. He said, “Let’s meet again, Donghee.” 

“Yes, sir,” said Donghee and left the cafe.

He answered the call. 

And it was an unexpected request. 

“Sir, what?!” Park Beom's eyes widened in disbelief.

“Do I have to repeat myself twice?!” Joon-Ho sounded irate. Park Beom was speechless. He thought, What happened this time? 

“I said, track the goddamn whereabouts of Im Hyun, right now! I want to know where he is. Do you understand?!” Joon-Ho said aloud. 

His frustration was hurting his ego.

He hung up the call as he gripped the phone in his right hand. 

And his rage trembled through him.