I woke up almost exactly four years later. A familiar whooshing sound filled my ears and my eyes cracked open ever so slightly. I felt the warmth of my breath bouncing back onto my face, and I felt the tug from the cuff on my arm while reaching up to grab the mask. I pulled the mask off of my face and let my head collapse back onto the bed.

                I laid still for a few seconds, taking a deep breath of the cool air, before pulling the cuff off my arm as well. I closed my eyes again and rolled onto my side with a slight grimace, elbow half propping me up. I exhaled deeply before opening my eyes again, this time all the way. Another pause and a few blinks to clear my vision before I pushed myself up, creaking into a sitting position at the edge of the bed.

                Damn it, I thought, my last memory hitting me.

In my head, I could see my parents waiting at home, phone in their lap, watching the news of the all the messages received from the ship being sent to families. My mother glancing nervously between the TV, my father, and her phone. My father sitting forward, elbows resting on his knees and hand running through his thinning hair. My parents, laying down to sleep that night, still listening for the chime from their phone. Waiting to get a call back from the mission's administrators. This week would be torture for me, but I couldn't even imagine how they must have felt for the past three years.

                I shook off the thought as best as I could for now, and slowly rolled onto my feet. I clumsily pulled open my drawer of clothes and changed into a loose-fitting outfit, looked in a small mirror I had stored in the corner shelf, and pulled open my curtain.

                As I stepped out into the hallway, a familiar bell chimed and an announcement started. The cheery rambling was much of the same as last time, and it barely registered as I walked down the hallway. As I passed though the usual hallways, the occasional curtain opened and weary eyed passengers began to funnel out of their rooms.

                My destination was on the other end of the level. A room with a proper door and about twice the size of a regular room, furnished in a similar way but with one difference. This room had a small desk with a computer, extra shelves, a filing cabinet, and a chest of emergency supplies tucked in the corner. I knocked hastily, and a young man answered. He shifted his long bangs out of the way and pushed his light golden hair over his ear. He leaned against the doorway, took a moment to focus on me, and gave me a sleepy but sincere smile.

                "I am really sorry to disturb you; I just realized that I was an absolute idiot and never sent my parents a message. It just slipped my mind, first I had to go to the infirmary, and... well, I know it's too late to send them one now but I wanted to check if they sent me one. And if it's not too early, just give them my message to send for this week." I blurted out. I took a second to try to compose myself, while the Lead took a second to process while nodding slowly.

                "No worries, you're not disturbing me at all. The leads and admin actually wake up two days early. Sorry if I look a bit out of it, it's just because there's a lot to process, prepare, get ready...." He continued, turning and walking into his room while raising his voice so I could still hear. "We send the messages out to your tablets automatically in about 30 minutes, but I can check for yours. Name?"

                "Soelli Rojas." I shuffled into the doorway half a foot so he could hear me clearly.

                "Nice to meet you! And I forgot to introduce myself; I'm Milton by the way." He turned for a second to grin at me before turning back to scroll through his computer, "Yeah, you got a few messages. And... yeah here's one that looks like your parents, Aurelio and Ellis?"

                "Yes! Ok, perfect." I sighed, but felt a nervous tingling in my arms.  My parents are amazing, but what would they say to me after I let them down so monumentally? Trying to conceptualize the amount of turmoil my simple carelessness must have caused was tough.

                "Since you're here, just come on in. You can read it from my computer. And you might as well type out your message to them on my computer too. I have to run down to the recreation room anyway to welcome everyone and get the party started. Just type out whatever you want and leave it up so I can save it, and then close the door on your way out, sound good? Oh, and you’re coming to the Year Six party, right?" He asked while grabbing an overflowing box next to the door, pausing to look at me expectantly.

                "Thanks, yeah I'll be there." I replied, nervously shuffling over to the computer screen.

                "Hey, good to hear. I'll see you down there." He left in a hurry and I could hear him walking down the hallway, greeting people by name who were coming out of their rooms.

                I focused on the screen and began to read the message that my parents had sent.

                Dear Soelli, we miss you! We didn't get your letter, but the team here said that everyone on the ship is present, accounted for, and safe. Your father said that your message may have just missed our planet entirely and it's floating off in space. I reminded him that you are our sweet little angel who also has your head in the clouds.

                I remember when you were only six years old and came home from school one day but had forgotten your backpack, and you nearly peed yourself crying because you thought we'd be upset. And you decided that night to make your own backpack out of a cereal box and string. You were adorable, even if that cereal box backpack didn't ever work out. And you just got your backpack the next day at school and everything was okay. So, if you get our letter, and you just happened to have gotten distracted like you sometime do, we hope you send us a letter for next time just so we know, that you know, that we love you.

                And this is your dad, we love you so much! We're really proud of you. And hopefully they calibrate the systems next time so your next message doesn't miss the planet. From what I’ve heard, the trip is pretty comfortable. Though I can't imagine how stressful it is being up there in space. Sorry, not trying to make you anxious if you're not.

                Anyways, how about some news from back here on solid ground to distract you? Teo found this lovely boyfriend, they are absolutely adorable together. You would love him (not as much as Teo of course, but you know what I mean) so we'll see if we can send pictures with the message. Your mom has a box full of 'em to send you, and is now telling me to ask you to send some photos back if you can. Hope they can figure out the technology to send more stuff to you, cuz that book series you've been reading, the Wrong Twin, just came out with new books or episodes or whatever they're called. Also, your cousins both moved out of your Uncle Elias' house! Can you believe that, after all this time? Also, your old school is being renovated, and between you and me it looks ugly as sin.

                Your father was taking too long and rambling, and we can't make this too long. So just know that we are proud of you and know that you are going to do great things. We hope you get to send us a reply (with pictures!) and stay healthy and happy! Love you!

                I pushed the seat out and slouched into it, tears welling in my eyes. I got to the end and couldn’t stop myself. I started to bawl, hand over my mouth trying to not be loud enough for anyone to hear. I leaned forward, resting my arms on the desk, and buried by face into my arms. I let my chest heave with each stuttering breath. And I felt a laugh start to break free from the depths of my chest.

                I took a moment to wipe away the streams from my eyes and start breathing normally again. I put my fingers over the keyboard and began to type. I tried to write a letter back that came close to the heartfelt outpouring of love that I had received, but that was a lofty goal. I explained that I had lost my head in the clouds after smacking it on the ground on the first day, but assured them the doctor didn't find any brain damage. I described the food, the friends, the gym, the library, everything I could think of and more. I read it back and reread it twice more.

                I stood up and left behind the worry and anxiety that had been weighing me down. I was practically giddy as I walked out of the room and carefully closed the door behind me. I was almost beaming, walking down the hallway past rooms with curtains open and only a few stragglers still emerging. I thoughtlessly navigated to the recreation room, drawn in by the increasingly loud chatter.

                I walked in, looking around at the gathering of people packed into the small rec room. Everything was set up just like last time. I saw glimpses of two tables in the back of the room, plates and cups in hands across the room. Several festive decorations were hung from the walls. There were several groups of people standing in circles showing handheld screens while deep in conversation. As I walked further in, I saw that they were looking at their letters and overheard laughing, gasps, and more excited chatter around the room. Meanwhile, my head was on a swivel looking for any familiar faces.

                "Hey, we meet again!" I heard from next to me. Turning, I saw the same guy that had invited me to the gym at the first 'Welcome Awake' party. A sudden realization struck me that I actually had gone to the gym more than once that week but never with him. And also, that I didn't know his name, despite seeing him around several times in that first week before. "I don't think I actually introduced myself last time? I'm Bryn, and you're Soelli right?"

                "Yes! Hi, nice to see you again, I went to the gym but never saw you there so I think we just had different schedules or whatever." I exclaimed with a newfound casual familiarity. Taken aback by myself, I quickly added, "Actually, do you want to meet up there tonight around... 6pm? That's when you go right?"

                "Now how did you know that?" he asked with a deviously adorable smile, "Yes, 6pm. Be there or I'll come find you and drag you to the gym with me." Was it just me or was he trying to...?

                "I'll be there." I replied with a playful confidence. I hastily continued before I became flustered, "Oh by the way, have you seen Lunëne? I thought they'd be here."

                "Oh, um..." he looked around for a second, then replied, "No, I haven't seen them yet."

                "Weird. Well, hey, see you around." I smiled, almost immediately beginning to wonder if that was a terrible way to end the conversation.

                "See ya tonight!" He turned to continue talking with the group that he had been standing with before. I wandered through the crowd for a minute, eyes wandering, searching through the crowd of people. After a few minutes of fruitless meandering, and with no one else at the party that I felt like making small talk with, I made my way to the door.

                My eyes now skimmed right over the directional signs as I walked the familiar route back to my room. My mind was somewhere else when I got back to my room and saw the curtain next to mine fully closed. Not only was their absence at the party peculiar, but the curtain being closed was also out of the norm for Lunëne. I paused at the entrance to my room, glancing at their curtain and unconsciously biting my lower lip in concentration.  I took a breath and sighed quietly in contemplation, all the while trying to listen for any clues. I raised my closed hand slowly, hesitated, and then reluctantly knocked on the door frame.