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I’m Not Suicidal, If That’s What You’re Thinking!

Episode 6 – Hospital bed (Again)

Episode 6 – Hospital bed (Again)

Jun 23, 2025

I parted ways with Barael and returned to reality.

When I opened my eyes, I found myself lying in a hospital bed again.

It seems someone discovered me collapsed near the greenhouse and brought me here.

The only difference this time is… they’ve cuffed my left wrist to the bed frame, as if to prevent another escape.

A neat little sign hangs nearby: “If you need anything, ring the bell.”

Come on, it wasn’t like I tried to sneak out or anything.

The mattress was just so uncomfortable, I wanted to nap in my dorm bed for a bit…

And now they’ve completely misunderstood.

Well, I suppose I should start by testing something.

‘Status window.’

At that thought, a translucent blue panel popped up in front of me.

It looked a bit rough around the edges, clearly not a finished product.

Right—this was the prototype system window created by Barael, based on my suggestion.

Barael had originally granted me just one wish.

But after a moment of thought, he decided to grant one more, saying my request was surprisingly modest.

And so, this system window was born.

I mean, I’m just an ordinary person.

If I’m supposed to stop the destruction of an entire world, I’d need some kind of edge.

Like a buff for the one chosen by a god—or, in this case, a god-like being.

Even though I remember the general flow of the original story, I only read it once years ago.

I can’t rely on memory alone.

So I asked for a system that could record and organize relevant information—

something I could refer back to at any time.

Barael did his best to follow my description and whipped up a functioning prototype.

It’s incomplete, sure. But with my feedback as its sole user, it will gradually improve over time.

And who knows? It might even become a way to keep in touch with him later on.


User: Sua Yoon (Aria Seren)

Age: 15

Race: Human

Connections:

• Erina Seren – Older sister, head of House Seren

• Theodore Seren – Older brother, eldest son of House Seren

Stats: [View Details]

Character Info: [View Details]


According to Barael, Aria Seren—the girl I’ve possessed—is already dead.

Still, I’ve inherited her appearance, her name, and her family ties.

“So if I press this…”

I tapped the “Character Info” section.

A detailed summary of Aria’s background opened up before me.

“Hmm… the line spacing is a bit cramped. Gotta leave feedback on that later.”

I skimmed through it quickly.

Right now, the priority was understanding Aria’s social position and relationships.

The last thing I needed was to get caught or misunderstood for saying something off.

As expected, Aria was the youngest daughter of the Seren family.

“Oh… she was adopted too?”

Somehow, that made me feel a strange sense of kinship.

What stood out most was this—Aria’s relationship with her siblings was… terrible.

In the original story, House Seren was barely mentioned.

Since the main setting is Arcadia Academy, and both Erina and Theodore had already graduated, they were basically side-background characters.

Aria, the youngest, was already dead by the time the main story began.

So even with my knowledge of the original, I have to rely on Aria’s own memories when it comes to her family.

They were like shadows—people who existed but never truly appeared.

I carefully dug into those memories.

Apparently, the relationship between the three of them completely fell apart after their parents passed away.

Not that they were especially close before that.

They barely spoke, treated each other with lukewarm indifference, as if they lived in separate worlds.

But after the funeral, even that fragile balance shattered.

Their bond—if it ever existed—froze into silence.

From that moment on, Aria became nothing more than a responsibility in their eyes.

Not blood-related, no longer tied by their parents—

she had become someone outside of their “us.”

And Aria… didn’t know how to respond to that.

Quiet by nature and awkward with emotions,

she never tried to smile or reach out first.

She stayed quiet, expressionless,

tried to carry the emptiness alone—

until she started acting out at school.

It began with skipping class, getting into fights with noble kids…

Small rebellions, but soon people began calling her “the shame of House Seren.”

That’s when everything changed.

Erina and Theodore stopped seeing her as a sister.

Even the bare minimum of sympathy they’d once had—

that too, disappeared.

Now they only saw her as a nuisance,

a girl tarnishing the family name.

Under those cold gazes, Aria learned to be silent.

She existed in the house, but never truly belonged.


“…This feels… different.”

I closed the window and leaned back against the bed.

The feelings were similar, but the weight was not.

I’d doubted before, too—wondered if I truly belonged,

if I was worthy of love.

But every time, my parents held me close without hesitation.

“You’re our daughter, no matter what anyone says.”

Those words. That warmth.

That truth held me together.

But Aria…

She never heard that, not even once.

Not a single soul ever told her:

“You’re part of this family.”

A bitter smile tugged at my lips.

If even one person had challenged her doubt,

told her she did belong—

maybe none of this would’ve happened.

But no one did.

In the end, Aria broke… all alone.

The only comfort now is this: I’m not her.

I, Sua Yoon, don’t need their love or approval.

I have no emotional ties to them.

Whether they like me or not is none of my business.

If they see me as a stranger—

then fine.

I’ll treat them just as formally.

Just strangers with the same last name.

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Ppyoko

Creator

Starting today, I’ll be uploading 2 episodes a day. Yay! 🎉
I’ve already published up to Episode 35 on the Korean webnovel platform,
so from here on, it’s all about translating and uploading on schedule.

Please make sure to like and subscribe so you don’t miss any updates!
Hold on tight—it’s only going to get more exciting from here! 💫

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I’m Not Suicidal, If That’s What You’re Thinking!
I’m Not Suicidal, If That’s What You’re Thinking!

923 views10 subscribers

I was just trying to quietly stab myself and go back to my original world.

But then—one of the side characters from the original novel saw everything.

How do you return home from another world?
1. Defeat the Demon King (If I were the hero, I’d be done already.)
2. Die here = auto return (So I stabbed myself. Seriously.)
3. Settle down and live here (Not about to break my parents’ hearts, thanks.)

But here’s the thing—

Everyone thinks I tried to end my life for some tragic reason.

They’re wrong.

Welcome to Arcadia Academy, a brutal fantasy novel infamous for its miserable endings.

I just wanted to die quietly and leave.

But now?

Everything’s officially messed up.
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18 episodes

Episode 6 – Hospital bed (Again)

Episode 6 – Hospital bed (Again)

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