Our last class of the day was English, our homeroom. This meant almost everyone I knew in my grade was in that class: Vicks, Amy, Pure, Peter, Viveca, and Junie. Dawn wasn’t in this class because she was a grade above us.

When class ended, Junie met up with Dawn outside the classroom. Vicks and Peter were talking about their day, and Pure was already gone. Pure was the only one in our friend group who had a car and a license. Finally, I slowly walked over to Amy and Viveca, who were chatting.

“Are you planning to tell Moir today?” I heard Viveca as I walked over.

“Tell me what?” I queried.

They both turned to look at me, surprised that I had appeared. Viveca opened her mouth to tell me something, but was quickly interrupted by Amy.

“Hey, Moir! How ‘bout we walk home together.”

“Oh, sure.”

I already knew. She didn’t have to tell me.

I proceeded to walk Amy to her house before going to mine. Amy felt bad that I had to walk her to her house, knowing I had to walk back to my own.

“I’m completely fine with walking you to your house, don’t even worry.”

“Okay, but you’re only allowed to drop me off at the cross streets.”

“Okay, fine.”

When we reached the cross streets, Amy stopped. She turned to me and wrapped her arms around my waist, and I wrapped my arms around her neck. I didn’t want to pull away, but I had to be the one to do so because we’d be there forever. When I pulled away, Amy looked somber, but gave me a quick peck on the cheek before crossing the street. I watched her walk past about five houses before finally reaching the right house. The moment I saw her open the door, I decided to leave shortly after.

When I got home, I decided to text Amy to let her know that I got home safely. She didn’t answer right away, but that was alright. I assumed she was getting her homework done, but when hours passed and I still got no answer, I was worried. I decided to text her again; maybe she didn’t get the notification. I waited until midnight, but never got an answer. My mind raced through the millions of possibilities. Maybe she got really tired after doing homework and fell asleep. Eventually, I fell asleep myself.

When I awoke Tuesday morning, I went straight to my messages to text Amy “Good morning”. Nothing. I rubbed my eyes; maybe I was still sleeping, maybe this was a bad dream. It wasn’t. Regardless, I still went to school, knowing I could talk to Amy when I got there. When I went to our usual meeting spot, there was only Viveca. No Amy.

“Viveca?”

“Oh, hey, Mo-” they paused. “Wait. Amy’s not with you?”

“I thought she’d be with you. You both usually get here before me.”

“Huh.”

“She hasn’t responded to any of my messages.”

Viveca’s face could only tell a look of worry. We could’ve talked more until the bell rang. Viveca told me that we’ll discuss it later when Junie and Dawn are both present before running to her first hour.

When I entered the door, my parents were already at the dining table. This meant I was gonna get a stern talking-to. “Detention, Amy Carena Allard. Really now?!” my mother began, “What did you do, huh?”

“I was late to class, it’s no big deal,” I murmured, setting my bag down on the floor and sitting down with them at the dining table.

“No big deal? Really?” she scoffed. “You were with that girl, huh?”

My mother has been suspicious about my relationship with Moir ever since we’ve gotten extremely close.

“Do you like that girl, Amy?” my mother went on.

“What girl? Viveca? Junie? Dawn?” I asked with a slight quiver in my voice, knowing who she meant.

“Do you think I’m dumb!? That girl that you’ve been spending a lot of time with,” my mother huffed in full Tagalog.

“Moir?” I began while my mother scoffed, “Moir is not a girl, Mom!”

“I’m not dumb, Amy.” My mother retorted, “You know we’re a Christian family.”

“What does THAT have to do with anything!?”

“WHAT YOU’RE DOING IS NOT THE WILL OF THE LORD!”

My father remained silent during this entire altercation, as always, he never has anything to say. At this point, I had had enough. I had enough of my mother using religion as an excuse for everything. I had enough of my dad never adding anything to these types of conversations. My father was always there, but somehow not at the same time. My mom would discuss the importance of religion in our lives and our family, and how we would be at the hands of the Devil if we weren’t devoted to God.

I decided to lock myself in my room and prepared a luggage for myself. I was leaving, I didn’t care anymore. I’m gonna move in with Viveca. I stopped going to school and figured I’d tell Viveca to tell Moir, knowing he’d be worried for me. I had cut all of my devices and turned off all of my location services in case my parents were somehow tracking me, but I couldn’t do all of that. We moved out the next day, my mother transferred me to a Christian private school, and took away all of my devices. Every day I was being lectured, and for a moment I ran out of hope, and there were a few times where I just thought about ending it. I saw a future with Moir, and it was gone in an instant. Every day was the same thing over and over again. I wake up, eat breakfast, go to school, go home, receive a lecture from my mom about God, and every night I would cry myself to sleep knowing I’d have to deal with it all over again the next morning. The morning after that as well, and the morning after that, and the morning after that. I never saw Moir, Viveca, Junie, and Dawn ever again.