I never knew the world could be this cruel.

The day my whole world crumbled before my eyes, I finally understood what true despair was.

My beloved son…
Do you remember the night you were born?

You cried louder than the storm raging outside, your tiny body trembling with fear. But the moment I held you close, you calmed. You slept so peacefully, curled against me, and in that moment, the whole world felt quiet.

I thought to myself, this is happiness.
I believed I could protect you from everything—from wars, from lies, from pain… even from the cruelty of this world.

But I was wrong.
The world is merciless.

I thought I could protect you, no matter what happened.
From the very moment you were born, I promised myself I would always cherish you, love you, and shield you from everything that could harm you.

But somewhere along the way… I lost sight of that promise.

Instead of being the mother you needed, I let my own pain and anger consume me.
I was so blinded by my struggles, by the weight of my own emotions, that I didn’t see how deeply it was hurting you.

I told myself I was doing my best.
I told myself there would be time later to make it right.
But those were just excuses.

Because of my selfishness, I let my wounds spill over, and in the end… I was the one who caused yours.
The one person I swore to protect, I ended up hurting the most.

There were nights when you reached out for me, crying softly, “Mom,” with tears streaming down your face… but I didn’t go to you.
I told myself there would be time later.
Later, when things were better.
Later, when I was stronger.

But later never came.

The day I lost you is burned into my soul.
I watched helplessly as the light faded from your beautiful eyes.
I felt your small hand—once so warm and full of life—grow colder and colder until it slipped away entirely.

And all I could do… was nothing.
Nothing but tremble, cry, and break into pieces.

I failed you.
I failed as a mother.
I failed as a woman.

When they took you from me, they didn’t just take my son. They took my heart, my purpose—everything.

But in the ruins of my grief, one truth remained: I cannot let this be the end.

If the world tries to tear you away from me again, then I will fight against it.
If the heavens dare to stand in my way, then I will rise and challenge them.

I will turn back time itself.
I will rewrite every mistake.
I will save you, no matter the cost.

And this time…
I will never let you go.