Days had passed, and Seo-jun, with Il-sung, was working in the shop. Seo-jun was on the search for another job. While many of them seemed to be interesting, they did not offer the salary that would give him a good income. His motivation fluctuated, often mixed with worry and an anxious sense of failure.

The news about the accident spread hastily, prompting the whole community to help however they could. People visited and took care of unconscious Hye-won, while Seo-jun and Il-sung tried to find a way to get the money that was needed.

Il-sung even considered taking money from loan sharks, but his grandson was talking him out of it. It was the last and most hopeless recourse that he wished not to use.

Over the course of the following days and weeks, the head of the commune managed to get resources for repairs and maintenance of the once again suffering ocean district. The youth volunteered to repair the damaged areas.

Streets, one of the few playgrounds, as well as trees that fell on the cars.

Seo Jun, along with his friends Baek Doyoon, Kim Ji-ho, and Kang Sung-min, was delegated with the cleaning of the kids' area.

“What a way to farewell the summer this year.” The young man sighed. He was tall, with the physique of someone who constantly works hard, broad shoulders, and a buzz cut. All together, Kang Sung-min looked intimidating to the strangers. However, for the people of the District, he was the most reliable youth.

He was the son of the fisherman who lived on the distant shore of the district. Ever since he was a young boy, Kang Sung-min was introduced to hard work and the art of sailing and fishing with his father. Years of manual labor shaped him into a quite handsome man.

“Some of the boats suffered. I’m worried how we will work it out.” He sighed, raking away large chunks of the trees that lay all over the playground. Near the entry gate, he formed a pile of all the rubbish that Kang Sung -min and his friends collected.

“Look at the bright side, Cloud. You and the others managed to hunt out a decent amount of fish for us to last.” Said the somewhat cheerful voice of Kim Ji-ho. He was the sunshine of the group. He was not as tall as Seo-jun or Sung-min, but it was compensated for by his bright smile and optimistic attitude. His layered haircut, which equally spread on the center of his head, softly moved in the wind of the day, as the sun shone. His pale and slim body contrasted with his two large friends.

He used to call Sung-min a Cloud, as he always seemed moody and grumpy.

“Only for a short while. We need to fix them as soon as possible and net in some more before cold kicks in.” Sung-min replied. He was annoyed that the last storm of the summer brought so much disaster.

Seo-jun and Baek Doyoon were silent. They were not talkative in the friend group and preferred to listen rather than speak. However, Doyoon was worried for Seo-jun, knowing that we had a much harder time than most of the folks.

Both of them were removing the swing, which was no longer good for kids to play on. It survived a few storms and many repairs, but it was time to go. “How are you holding in?” He asked Seo-jun, eyeing him with a side eye. It was easy to do, since dark hair fell on his face effortlessly, allowing him to look at anyone with no repercussions.

“I need a new job. With money and fast. Halmae needs to get better.” Seo-jun responded dryly but softly. His mind was falling down the rabbit hole, and he needed to find something.

“We are sorry, brother. Just let us know if we can help in any way - we’ll be there.” Said Sung-min, approaching his best friend. His warm and strong hand gently landed on Seo-jun’s shoulder, comforting.

He was not the one to share his feelings, but on a rare basis, he would show some care and sympathy to the ones he cherished the most. His gaze lowered to the damp sand, which always stuck in between his feet and sandals. A grimace of regret formed on his face, which ached to be looked at.  “If only I knew you were on the dock that day, if only I knew...”

“But you didn’t.” Seo-jun snapped. His mind rushed back to that dreadful day, causing him to shiver. Breath in - breath out. “You were on the other end of the shore, helping your folks. End of the story.”

The sky seemed to turn its back on them as the clouds started blocking the sun.

Suddenly, the tension between Seo-jun and the rest of the group arose. He felt like no one would understand him, and a sudden urge to distance himself from them fired in his chest, making it hard to breathe. All of them knew him too well to tell that he was in the dark place.

Ji-ho stepped in with a concerned expression. “If you need, take a breather for a bit.”

Seo-jun suddenly snapped out of his dark state and looked at his friend. Breath in - breath out. His face softened as he offered a small, but assuring smile. “Yeah, thanks. I’ll grab a smoke”. He nodded.

Seo-jun grabbed his hoodie and a pack of cigarettes and left the playground without looking back.

All three of the friends looked at each other, concerned. They knew that Seo-jun had a very hard time processing anything related to loss. As much as they wanted to help him, they hardly had any money themselves.

With a heavy sigh and a weight on their hearts, they continued to clean the playground premises.

In the meantime, Seo-jun’s legs took him to the shore, where he not long ago fished with the gramps. The ocean was mostly calm, but occasionally uneven waves surged up. The water had a dark blue with a dirty grey mix. The clouds thickened, with a promise of rain. The further he looked, the darker the cloud appeared. Suddenly, the whole world lost its vibrant colors and everything along with it. As if camera lenses switched color grading to Blue Tint. A younger him would love the effect...

As he stood on the edge of the cliff, Seo-jun couldn’t accept that just recently, Halmae was alive and in good health. And now, she was chained to the hospital bed, on the verge of life and death.

A sharp and dulling ache pierced his heart, anxiety eating him alive. Seo-jun breathed in the smoke, allowing nicotine to do its magic. After a short while, he exhaled, feeling slightly relaxed.

Breath in - breath out.

His zipper hoodie and shorts swing in the strong breeze, along with his long and unstyled hair, which fell onto his face. His ruby eyes pierced through the distance, seeking the courage to move forward, but it was nowhere to be found. Just him against the odds of the world. Seo-jun was scared. He felt as if the luck turned its back on him in time he needed the most. Growing up, he never felt like he was in need of anything, but now, he was cursing himself for not working hard enough in the past, for not choosing the better degree, for not making something out of himself, and for not earning money to take care of his grandparents. For not getting out of the district and finding good money in the city...

Unexpectedly, Seo-jun realised why his ex-girlfriend had fallen out of love.

Seo-jun had no future prospects; he was a nobody.

The realisation stabbed him. The feeling was so intense that Seo-jun gripped the roots of his hair hard enough to rip them out. For a brief moment, everything went black in his eyes. Seo-jun could feel him breaking from inside. Ovewhelmed yet drowning, felt that his mind had become heavier than anything he’d ever carried. If he’d tried, he would have suffocated in water and steadily gone down like a rock.

The strong wind and scream of seagulls returned him to reality as he looked around.  Seo-jun loved the ocean. He loved how alive the water could become with a snap of a finger, how unpredictable it could be, how spontaneously the waves jumped on the shore, and how ruthless it could be

Just like a woman.

The thought made him chuckle with a dulling ache.

Suddenly, Seo-jun felt something stroking his leg. Or rather, something got stuck. He looked down and realised it was a paper. Leaning down, he grabbed the paper; he didn’t bother to look at it, as he planned to throw it away into the bin on the playground.

And with that, he turned back to whence he came from, with a feeling of a heavy weight on his shoulders that grew with every passing step...