It was a familiar situation I had found myself in. 

Sweat pouring down my forehead, the drops just narrowly avoided my eyes, breaths heavy with my arms, legs, and even my stomach pounding in excruciating pain, to the point that almost every bit of my body began to shake uncontrollably under the intense pressure. 

Barely able to even hang on, as this final section of the Mountain not only didn’t have any good crevices around to get a decent grip on, but most of the wall was as hard as diamond that blended so well with the rest of the surface that it was impossible to tell apart from the regular rock.

One wrong strike and my pick-axe will rebound off it and leave me staggering, with a higher risk of losing my delicate grip and plummeting back down the mountainside. It didn’t help that the angle shifted yet again, shifting so much that it was basically like climbing upside down on a ceiling, making it an intense fight with gravity as I struggled to pull myself up on the next bit of rock for dear life.

If that wasn’t bad enough, this Mountain had another cruel trick up its sleeve as it summoned intense winds that blew by at this altitude, forcing you to stop in place and put all your strength into holding onto the cliff-side; even easing up slightly on your grip would send you flying off into the distance, putting even more pressure on your aching body that is already screaming bloody murder at this point. 

Worst of all, the wind was erratic with no possible way to predict when the next wave of wind would blow by, meaning you just have to proceed forward and time the changing wind on pure instinct, because otherwise, if you are in the middle of pulling yourself up this never-ending wall- 

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhh….”

…

Then you’ll suffer the same fate as the poor soul that just flew right past me, desperately flailing about and trying so hard to grab hold of any part of the Mountain so they wouldn’t have to fall back to the bottom again… A futile attempt, as they just continued to tumble all the way back down before eventually losing sight as they disappeared in the fog while their harrowing scream continued to echo throughout the land. 

...A situation I related all too well with, praying that one day this person could have the chance to make it to the paradise waiting above, returning my focus to the intense climb before me that always put my abilities to the most rigorous of tests. 

Doing all in my power to keep pushing on ahead, moments slow and calculating, as after making it to this point so many times, I’ve familiarised myself with part of the climb enough to know which crevices were the best to grab hold of and which parts of the wall to strike with my pick-axe along with gaining a sixth sense over when the wind would blow past.

Such actions were much easier said than done, and that’s underselling just how much of an intense struggle it was juggling all these factors at once, all while trying to make progress up this hellish section, for even the simple action of raising my arm to strike the next bit of rock felt like absolute torture on my arm, causing it to pound and burn in pain as if it were dipped in a vat of molten lava, only growing worse with each strike I had made to the point it felt like my arm could tear off at any moment.

My legs didn’t fare much better, as not only were they causing me similar pain, but unlike my arms, they began to feel completely numb, making the climb a lot harder to deal with, struggling to tell if I managed to get a solid foothold or not. The only saving grace was that my many previous failed attempts misjudging my foothold taught me to adapt to the loss of feelings in my legs and arms and am now able to gauge when I have found solid ground.

However, just because I could adapt to the pain, that didn’t mean the struggles were over, far from it, since what made this part of the climb so slow and agonising was that for every bit of progress you made, no matter how minute, you had to force yourself to stop and take a moment to catch your breath; otherwise, you’d be overexerting your body to the point that it would shut down and lock up all your joints, and you wouldn't be able to keep your grip on the wall, and well...It’s obvious what the end result entails.

Even so, stopping didn’t really result in what people would class as any sort of proper real rest, and that was all due to the unforgivable angle, which meant you still had to exert so much body strength to hold on, paired with the intense winds that forced you to cling on more than you normally would if you didn’t want to risk falling off, meaning there was no real opportunity to allow your muscles to give off any sort of relief. 

Yes, even stopping to take a rest was like torture that put real strain on my poor body, the palms of my hands taking the full brunt, pounding uncontrollably in burning pain as they had to clench down tight on both the crevices and pick-axe all while supporting my body. It's no wonder why they were screaming at me to just let go so they could feel even a second of relief. 

Despite the yelps from all corners of my body to just give up and let myself fall, I refused to give in to such demands and powered through the pain as I continued to climb at the same slow and methodical pace as I had been before.

It didn’t matter who or what was against me, whether it was the Mountain, the world itself, or even my own body... Nothing was going to stop me from reaching my dream!

I-I just know that if I just keep pushing ahead, I’ll finally make it past those dreaded dark clouds that have continued to torment me for all these years and make it to paradise...Today! 

Today was going to finally be the day I make the dreams I’ve fought so hard towards a reality!

…

I...I can...Do...It... 

As I approached the highest point I have ever made it on this climb, both my body and mind started to reach their breaking points, breaths becoming more erratic and hard to stabilize. The pain that echoed throughout my body had reached such a breaking point that every part of me began to feel numb rather than just exclusively my legs.

Identifying even the crevasses to take hold of the walls I needed to strike became next to impossible to notice as my vision began to blur, my head started to feel dizzy and faint as if I'd had one too many at the pub.

Ending up in this withering state had left me completely frustrated at just about everything around me, especially with myself, with how close I’ve yet again made it to reaching the top only to start bubbling it all again.

Knowing if I were still in my youth, I would be able to clear this climb and make it to the top in no time even with the struggles and challenges it had presented, yet what held me back all those years ago was my lack of experience to even come close to making it this far...Kicking myself for only taking this climb seriously later than most in life, all because I had the foolish belief this Mountain was a joke and wasted a good chunk of my youth messing around in the woods and hanging with my friends.

Even if I still cherish those memories, I can’t help but feel this great regret knowing that I could have spent that extra time focused on building up my climbing experience so I could tackle this section at a younger age and avoid the great struggles I’m dealing with today.

Who knows...I might have even been able to make it to the top a lot sooner and have more time to enjoy living in utter paradise with everyone I love...Yet now that I do have a decent amount of experience, it is now time itself paired with this aging body holding me back...Such a great irony wasn’t lost on me and couldn’t help but have a hearty laugh about how messed up such a situation had been if only to prevent myself from breaking down crying.

Looking up, it dawned on me that I was only about three more feet away from reaching my personal record, yet instead of being filled with great excitement and a newly awakened sense of determination from the idea of breaking my old milestone…

I was just tired…Just so….Very tired...

My desire being nothing more than to just lean back and fall into a deep slumber, hiding away from the world for at least a couple of hours in my dreams, staying somewhere where everything I ever wanted or desired could be easily accessible and I didn’t have to worry about a single thing.

Eyes started to flicker, losing the battle to keep them open, all the while my body started to relax its muscles as the tight grip I had on the crevasse and my pick-axe slowly began to loosen, slowly inching backward as my hands slipped further and further off the objects I held onto. 

Slowly drifting off into that blissful world where there were no more worries or responsibilities to be concerned about…

But in the end I refused! 

I refused to allow myself to drift away into a false reality and forced every bit of my remaining mental and physical strength stored deep within me to snap myself back awake and regrab the crevasse and my pick-axe as tight as I could once more.

Deep breaths escaped me as I began to hug the wall after almost completely losing my grip and falling down yet again, gazing down below to the thick layer of fog that was only seconds away from consuming me, relieved that I had managed to snap myself out of that drowsy state just in the nick of time.

In that moment I furrowed my brow and directed my glare back up the Mountain, vowing that I couldn’t allow myself to give up, not only because I was about to pass my personal best, but also because I was so close to the top that it was only a few feet away from reaching the dark cloud that blocked the sight of paradise itself.

My dream... The dream I’ve spent most of my life struggling to obtain was within my reach once again, and this time I wasn’t going to let my nerves get the best of me and let it slip out of my hands again! 

So with this newfound, unbreakable resolve that had flowed through my very soul, my body felt fully recharged, wasting no time capitalising on this newfound spark of energy and slammed my pick-axe into the wall above, pulling myself up and reaching out to the next crevasse to grab onto, repeating this same process in quick succession as if my very life was on the line until finally...

After many years I’ve not only managed to return to the spot where my personal best had stood... But also surpassed it by an extra two whole feet! 

Couldn’t help but take a moment to pause and look down to the very spot where I had lost my grip and caused myself to fall back down and left myself in a rut for many years now, feeling a deep sense of pride knowing that I managed to make it this far and could now look down at this bit of wall that had once defeated me all those years ago.

However this no time to dwell on such an accomplishment... For there was a beast that had now awoken inside, knowing I was so much closer to the top, so I couldn’t let this second wind go to waste by hanging around here when my dream was closer than ever before. 

So gazing back up to the Mountain that had fought against me at every turn, I returned its antagonism towards me with a nasty scowl, letting it know that no matter what it threw at me, I wasn’t going to let it beat me this time! 

After a quick scan over the rest of the path to plan out the best route, I waste no time and start climbing at speeds I didn’t even think I was capable of achieving, feeling absolutely unstoppable as I begin to make it closer to the very top of this hellish structure. Not even the blazing wind could stop me, as it felt like nothing more than a brisk breeze on a lovely spring day to me now.

However, this feeling didn’t last long; I quickly slowed myself down until I came to a complete halt. Such a feeling of invincibility had now been replaced with a sense of deep dread the moment I saw the final obstacle between me and reaching paradise…. 

The dark cloud that spiralled around the top of the Mountain

Ever since I was little, this darkened cloud had surrounded the top of this mountain, completely obscuring our view of what paradise had looked like, never letting up for a moment, and regardless of which angle you viewed it from the ground, you could never even grab a single glimpse within it. 

Hell, from the stories from my family going as far back as my great-grandparents, this dark cloud has always been spinning up there for generations, and it wouldn’t shock me if it’s been there since the dawn of time, blocking out the sight of paradise even from the cavemen back then. 

As a kid, witnessing this ominous cloud mocking us from high above had terrified me so much that it even gave me nightmares of what it might do to us one day... To be honest that fear had only increased the older I had gotten, reaching its boiling point right this moment now that I’m about an arm's length away from making contact with it.

Having no clue just what horrors could be waiting for me the moment I head inside there… It didn’t help thinking about others who have no doubt made it into the dark cloud before me yet have never heard a single story of anyone who actually returned to describe what was really there.

Either everyone who had headed inside made it to paradise and is living the rest of their days in peace... Or they suffered a terrible fate the moment they headed inside... That final possibility had me gulping back as a thick layer of sweat poured down my forehead, pondering if it's wise to continue forward like this when I have no idea what's waiting for me the moment I head inside.

Should I...give up and turn back to where I’m guaranteed to be safe? ...No...

No! I can’t chicken out now all because of some stupid cloud when my dream is so close! It doesn’t matter how intimidating it is or what could be waiting inside! I wasn’t going to let it stop me and continued my climb without a second thought! Officially breaking through and entered the dark cloud, taking on my final obstacle before finally- 

Conquering this impossible Mountain!

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