=  CHRIS POV =

When we got to the apartment, I was praying silently that Sarah was gone.

 I opened the door, my pulse quickening, and the first thing I saw on the ground was a tiny pile of torn-up pieces of post-it. 

My stomach twisted, but I exhaled sharply.

 Good. 

At least she was awake and functional. Sarah loved making a whole spectacle out of tearing up my notes as a signal that she had read them.

I stepped aside, letting Jenny walk in behind me, her heels clicking softly against the floor.

“Why are you sneaking about? This is literally your place,” Jenny said, crossing her arms as she arched a perfectly sculpted brow. Her voice was low, sultry, but her words hit like a slap. “You really need to get a handle on things.”

“Shut up. This was your idea,” I snapped back in a sharp whisper. My eyes darted toward the hallway, irrationally worried that Sarah might suddenly appear out of nowhere. I walked hurriedly to the guest room, needing to confirm what I already hoped was true.

I pushed the door open, and relief washed over me. Sarah was gone. Her stuff was still scattered everywhere, a trail of clothes and makeup cluttering the vanity table and bed. She was such a messy person, always had been, but there was no sign of anything out of the ordinary. This was her usual chaos. 

Whatever had happened, she had gotten herself ready and left, hopefully to that job of hers which was apparently on its last stretch?

Fuck… I couldn’t think about that right now. All I could think about was…

I turned back around only to find myself being jumped by Jenny.

“Ah-ha! Scared you?” she teased, wrapping her arms loosely around my neck. Her voice was syrupy sweet, but the mischief in her eyes twisted something tight inside me. She laughed, pulling back her arm, only to push past me as though she owned the place. 

Flouncing into the guest room, Jenny spun around and flopped onto the bed like it was her throne.

“So this is where she stays?” Jenny smirked, her eyes glinting with dangerous excitement. “Let’s do it here!”

My stomach dropped. I rushed toward her and grabbed her by the elbow, pulling her off the bed before she could plant herself in any way that might make me lose my mind.

“No,” I said sharply, my voice low but firm.

Jenny pouted, trying to resist, but I didn’t let go.

“Look, we came here to role play, and this is where she is staying. I can get into –” Jenny began.

“N-No I… I want to do her in my room,” I blurted out before I could stop myself. 

Jenny raised her brows, intrigued, but I pushed forward quickly. 

“You said you wanted to play the part, so go to my room. Wait for me on the bed. I’ll come to you.”

Jenny tilted her head, clearly amused, but she didn’t fight me. Instead, she leaned in close enough that I could feel her breath on my neck.

“Okay,” she murmured, her lips just brushing the shell of my ear. “As long as that’s what you want.”

She pulled away and strolled out, hips swaying as she made her way to my bedroom. I could hear her already taking off her clothes and I hated how effortlessly she fit into the moment, while I felt like I was falling apart.

I let out a shaky breath and turned back to Sarah’s bed. My feet stayed rooted to the spot, my eyes lingering on the mess she left behind. I could smell her perfume, that sweet floral scent she always wore, still lingering faintly in the air. It was driving me insane.

My fingers twitched at my sides. I wanted to throw myself onto those unmade sheets, to bury my face in her pillow, to drown myself in her scent and pretend, just for a moment, that last night had ended differently. That I hadn’t walked away. That I hadn’t done the right thing.

But I didn’t move. Even a pervert like me had limits.

I rubbed my face, forcing myself to let it go. Last night, even for the briefest moment, had been the best, worst dream I had ever had. And I couldn’t let myself fall apart over it. I had Jenny waiting for me in the other room, willing and ready to be the outlet I needed to get Sarah out of my system.

So why did it feel so wrong?

I shook my head and forced myself to step away from Sarah’s bed, and leave the guest room.

 This was reality. I could hold on to the memory, keep my friendship intact, and deal with my mess privately.

 I had Jenny, my Sarah stand-in since my university days.