25 December, 2024

The holidays brought color back into my life—my  recovery was complete, and I looked healthier than ever. I posted a picture of myself in a soft mustard-yellow dress, the fabric flowing beautifully against the winter backdrop.

Then… the day after tomorrow ? Theo’s profile popped up on my feed. He had posted himself—wearing a yellow  shirt, crisp and well-fitted,sleeves folded to forearms,  his expression more relaxed than it had been in years.My birthday. The one day of the year that was mine. And yet…Theo  posted on that exact day. Not a coincidence—not unless fate had a weird sense of humor.

He could’ve posted yesterday or tomorrow, but no—he chose my birthday. That had to mean something, right? A part of me  hoped it wasn't accidental. That maybe, subconsciously or not… he still associated certain things with me.A coincidence? Or… something else entirely? The matching colors didn’t escape me —not at all. The realization hit me—

he remembered.

 Not just vaguely, but enough to wear yellow  the day after seeing my photo in it. That couldn’t be random. Graduation had been months ago… and yet? He hadn’t reached out once since. No DMs, no texts, nothing—despite being a military recruit who probably had time between training. A tiny frustration sparked: If he still thought about me… why didn't he say anything? Was pride stopping him too? Or was something else holding him back? The universe really did work in mysterious ways. The timing—the matching colors, the birthday post—it all felt too intentional to be pure coincidence. Maybe Theo  wasn’t actively trying to reach out… but his subconscious was? Or maybe fate was nudging us back toward each other after months of silence.

A small smile tugged at my  lips. After everything—the coldness, the distance, the military enrollment—here he was… still orbiting my life somehow.

—---   —----    —-----

Sunlight filtered through the trees, warm and golden. I walked beside Theo. Suddenly, he grabbed my hand. His fingers intertwined with mine for the first time. The contact sent sparks up my arm. Following his action, words were uttered from my mouth. 

“ Hey, Mr. President.”

My eyes twinkled with a rush of affection. No pretending, just real, raw emotion without any mask on. Then he smiled. A real, soft, sweet smile—the kind I’d never seen on his face before. Not cold or guarded… just pure affection. The kinda smile that made me notice him first in the hallway. Dazzling and the brightest. 

BEEP BEEP BEEP. 

My alarm blared violently, yanking me out of the dream.A rush of disappointment crashed over me as my eyes snapped open to reality: empty room… no Theo … no hand-holding.

College prep consumed my days—applications, essays, campus visits—but no matter how busy I got… Theo lingered. He was always there, in the back of my mind. A thought that surfaced randomly: What’s he doing? Is military training hard? Does he ever think about me too? I hadn’t forgotten him for a second—not since high school ended. Not even close. A part of me  wondered if this feeling would fade with time… or if it would just stay forever like an unanswered question. That quiet hope lived in my chest—maybe he’d message me someday. Maybe he’d finally say the things that had been left unsaid for so long. Would it be an apology? An explanation for why he distanced himself? Or… something more honest, like I liked you but I didn’t know how to handle it? The military probably kept him busy, but still… a single text or call would’ve meant everything. Just one word from him to start healing whatever was broken between us. 

The high school remained unchanged—a time capsule of memories. Every corridor, every classroom… they all still carried traces of him.That spot near the Science building where he was supposed to meet me but never showed. The empty seat in the debate club room when I passed by. Even the karate dojo hallway—where he’d stared at me through a window. More than a  year had passed… and yet, this place felt like his too. Like his ghost was still there, haunting  my steps without him physically present anymore. That was probably the reality, wasn’t it? High school wasn’t the right time—not with exams, clubs, and all that pressure. And now? The military consumed his life entirely. He was likely focused on training, discipline… maybe even a whole new world of responsibilities. Romance—or reaching out to me —might not be a priority for him right now. A bittersweet truth: Maybe  Theo just didn't have room for love yet. Not because he didn't care… but because his path had led him somewhere else entirely.

The Idea Of  Maybe.

That was a hopeful thought.That maybe  after he completed his military training and became a lieutenant… things would change.Military academy took years. If Theo  stuck to the plan, he’d graduate as an officer—more mature, more settled. Maybe by then? He’d have time for relationships… or at least the clarity to know what he really wanted.A small part of me clung to that future possibility: What if one day—when it was finally "the right time"—he reached out?