I stand here, silent, as I always am, as the Emperor and his family sit in their plush seats at the crystal table, idly talking to each other. They pay me no attention, as if I'm invisible. As if I'm not there at all, and I almost wish I was not here at all, because then I could escape the suffocating feeling of the strange and all-consuming loneliness that overcomes me. I'm drowning on dry land. I am always drowning on dry land. 

"What have you learned today in weapons training?" the Empress asks the Prince brightly. 

"Nothing much. Just, a few different ways to cut a monster's head from their body." The Prince smiles.

Monsters. Like me. I shiver, at the thought of what the Prince could do to me if I ever stepped out of line, or if even he ever wanted to. 

"That's lovely," the Empress states. 

"You will be a great warrior yet," the Emperor tells him. 

He will, I'm sure. The Prince is glorious. He is good. He is capable of anything that he sets his mind to. 

"Thanks, but it's not easy," the Prince replies. 

"Of course it's not easy, my son," the Emperor coos, "but you're studying hard and you're not giving up. You will be a great leader yet."

"Thanks, dad." 

"So, son," the Empress begins, "have you talked more to the girl in your training cohort?"

"Not much, mother. But we get to talk here and there. She seems to like me well enough."

"Would you like us to invite her to the palace?" she asks.

"I would, but I would feel a bit embarrassed being around her alone."

"We could invite your other friends as well."

"Okay, mom."

"Boy!" I can tell that the Empress is addressing me because of the horrible and harsh tone she uses. My heart shivers in my chest under her harsh words. "Go get us more punch! The jug is running low!"

"Yes, Empress," I reply readily, reply hollowly. There is nothing else I could say. 

I rush to the kitchen with the diamond pitcher of punch and I hurriedly fill it, rushing back. The dining rooms are all close to kitchens, thank the gods, and each kitchen is fully stocked. So I do not have to walk for too long. But still, I take care to take as little time as I can. I know that I wil be rebuked if I don't. I know that I have to perform as best as I can. I dodge and weave through the constantly moving nanobots all around me. 

"You're late." The Emperor's words are cold and devoid of affection. As they always are when talking to me. 

"I'm sorry, sir," I reply to him. He doesn't reply back, turning once again to face his family. I stand there, ready to do whatever is required of me. 

They talk on, once again oblivious to my presence. I am once again a shadow left against their blinding brilliance. And I listen to them talk. I listen to them talk even though it tears me up inside, even though it leaves me drowning, because the silence is somehow even more deafening. 

———

The family has retreated to their private rooms to attend their own matters. They are content and happy, after a long day of running the empire and living their lives. Usually, I am supposed to be attending to them even though. But I have to recharge the energy of the palace right now. A task which I am deeply dreading yet strangely looking forwards to. 

The other slaves usually do most of the energy recharging. The castle is huge. It's intricate. I wouldn't be enough to do it all. I wouldn't be enough to keep all the robots running and doing what they are meant to do. That's why there are hundreds of other slaves making the energy to make everything run, using the magic in their bloodstream as an energy source for all the machinery that makes the palace run. 

But the Prince breaks things. He breaks things all the time. And I have to use my magic to repair them. It's my job, and really the main reason that I am kept here in the castle, kept away from all the other slaves, kept away from all the other monsters, away from anyone in the same position as me. Because I'm needed in here, not out there. And I need to do all that I need to do in here. 

So I walk into the contraption of whirring metal parts that is connected to all the things that the Prince broke. I get inside the twisting and moving metal cage. And I attach all the wires made of Vaderium to my wrists, my neck, the holes on my lips. I take a deep breathe as everything writhes to life around me. 

And all I can feel is pain. It courses throughout each and every part of my body, burning and grating and leaving me shaking and gasping. My body feels like it's being ripped open and sliced with a serrated knife. It feels like pure heat is flowing in my veins instead of blood. And it's white-hot. White-hot. Everything is white-hot. I almost pass out, as I always do, but the machine isn't merciful enough to let me do that, as it needs me awake in order to extract my magical energy. 

But it's okay. It's what I'm here for. It's what I exist for. I exist to burn. I exist to hurt. I exist to hurt and to bring glory to the empire with my hurting. It's all that I am capable of. It's all that I will ever be capable of. A monster like me, weak and pathetic and lowly, can only serve his betters, can only be a sacrifice to the empire. 

Hours pass, and eventually I am released from the hold of the machine. I collapse on the floor, and I lay there, breathing hard. Everything inside me aches. Everything inside me feels like death. But this is not a new sensation. I always feel like death in my heart. I always feel beyond death. My body is simply reflecting my heart and my mind right now, was simply reflecting it during the whole time I was in that looming mechanism. 

It's sweet, having your body reflect your heart. Sweet and terrible and magnificent.

I suppose I'm lucky in a way. I only have to do this for about two hours each day. The other monsters, the other slaves on the Home Planet or the lower planets, they have to go for eight hours each day. That must be worse. Maybe. I don't know how they do it. But at least they have other monsters around them. Sometimes I think that I could endure any amount of physical pain for any amount of time if it meant I could have other monsters around me, in my life. I don't know why I long for this so badly. 

A whizzing disc flies up to me, about the length of one of my fingers. One of my dark purple, monstrous fingers. 

"Slave! Bring me a dragon simulator." The Prince's voice echoes through the room from the small device, before it starts whizzing away again. 

———

My arms are straining under the weight of the heavy gold-encrusted armour that I am lugging. I half walk, half run down the twisting corridors from the armoury to the training room. I have to go fast. I have to go fast. I have to get all of this armour to the Prince and I have to get him ready for training. Dodging the nanobots all along the way. I hate the nanobots. 

I finally emerge into the large room with a glowing grid of neon stretched over its walls, with simulations of various beasts and monsters and even some people standing ready. The Prince is there, along with his four friends, the girl he has a crush on, and their trainer. I deposit the armour on the polished obsidian floor at his feet. 

"Oh, you're back, slave," he acknowledges. 

"Yes, sir." 

The armour rises up to coat him with itself. And he turns back to his friends. I stand on the sidelines, watching them fight an army of blackish-purple monsters that look too similar to me. I admire my master and his friends. Their skill, their prowess, their grace. I think about how ugly I must look from their point of view. 

Finally, the simulated battle is over and the soldiers in training are left panting and coated with sweat. 

"We did it," the Prince's blond-haired friend pants, "we killed them all."

"Yes, we did!" The Prince's voice is boisterous. "And we will kill them all. Boy!" he waves to me, "come here!"

I rush to him. His muscular figure towers above my scrawny skinniness. 

"We will kill all the monsters!" he declares to his friends, catching my throat in his large, warm hands. I start panicking preemptively, knowing where this will lead. But as he squeezes tighter and tighter, cutting off my air, I feel a sense of calm and peace that I have never felt before. I will die like this. This is how I die. 

He squeezes tighter. And tighter. I can't breathe. My head throbs. My neck is overcome with pressure, it feels as if all my muscles are collapsing. I try to gasp but I can't as my vision blurs. I feel lightheaded. My lungs feel like they're being sucked out of my body. My whole body screams as it reaches desperately for oxygen that I cannot get. 

I'm going to die. I'm going to die. He's going to kill me. Thank the universe that he's going to kill me. Thank the universe that I finally, finally, finally get to die. That this aching, hurting existence is finally going to end and maybe I'll ... maybe I'll even be free. I am overcome by giddiness. He is going to kill me!

But he doesn't kill me. He lets me fall onto the floor in a pathetic heap, desperately coughing and gasping in front of his friends who are standing above me, laughing. 

"Just like that!" the Prince proclaims, "all the monsters will crumble before me just like that."

"Won't your dad get angry though?" the red-haired friend asks, "he is proud of the peace he created in the galaxy, and proud of the wealth he built as well."

"The monsters are bound to forget their place and act up," the Prince retorts, "then we'll see."

I want desperately to tell him that I know my place, I know my place, I will always know my place. But I know he doesn't want to be interrupted now, not while he's gloating to his friends. Not while he's telling them of all the glories he will create when he finally takes his place as the new Emperor. When he takes his birthright. 

I hope that his plan succeeds. That he can kill all of us. Because that will be better than this. That will be so much better than this burning existence that we are forced to live. Of course, this existence is deserved. But death would also be deserved. Death would also be deserved and it would be much sweeter. 

But I know that this dream of his will not last into adulthood, will not last into the day when he actually becomes Emperor. He will realize how much the galaxy runs on our magic before that day. And everything will go on exactly as it is. 

"Slave!" the girl orders, "Go get me a laser blaster!" 

I pull myself up and rush back towards the armoury.