A/N: TW for thoughts of suicide, depression, drugs, and mentioned suicide.

Sleep didn't come easy to Britanny. Unless she'd been working all day, of course. But more often than not, she found herself awake in the middle of the dead of night.

Why? There were so many reasons. For one, stress. Another one was because of her own mind trying to shut itself down. Sometimes, she wondered if she'd fall asleep and never wake up again. Was that really a bad thing?

It was too late to bother anyone. Too late to go out. Too late to do anything but sit there, alone, in the dark of her room.

She stared at a portrait of herself and her papa. What would he say, if he were here? Would he tell her to stay calm? That it was all just a bad dream?

She missed him. She wanted to speak to him, one last time. And yet, she was angry at him, too. He'd abandoned her, taking his own life and then disappearing forever.

It felt like when that Nerling 2nd had gotten into her head, but this time, it was her own mind turning on her. She wanted to tell it to stop, but it would never listen. It would just keep swirling and swirling, reminding her how much everyone was looking at her, judging her, hating her…

So she got up. She crept out of her room and walked to the rooftop, a pack of cigarettes in hand. She lit up, gazing at the stars. The sun was just barely visible on the horizon.

If she was lucky, she'd fall over the edge.

"Why are you awake?"

Britanny sighed. Her mother was the last person she wanted to see, and yet, lo and behold…

Alina Wicker was standing there, her brow furrowed as she stood by the door. Perpetually judgemental, as always.

"Can't sleep," Britanny said.

She knew her mother would lecture her about smoking again, about going out at night, whatever else. She was so tired, but she couldn't sleep. She didn't want to deal with this anymore.

Even at night, Alina wore a hat that was lowered enough to hide a good portion of her face. Alina never liked to show her emotions; she'd say it was for the sake of her company, but Britanny knew it was because she was scared. She was always scared.

Alina looked up at the sky, and for a moment, her eyes glistened.

"He loved the sky," she said. "He was obsessed with the sunset. It was so silly. So much time wasted."

Britanny wanted to scream at her. But, on the other hand, how rare was it for her mother to talk about Papa? After he'd died, to Alina it was like he'd never existed.

Britanny scoffed to herself. Too little too late.

"And he'd take you up here, when you were only yea high," Alina said, gesturing to her knees. "He'd say you deserved a break. A moment out in the open."

"Maybe he was right," Britanny muttered.

"Maybe," Alina agreed, closing her eyes. She backed up, turning away. "Don't forget you have a shoot tomorrow."

Of course, back to business as always. It was nice while it had lasted.

"Yes, Mother," Britanny sighed, left alone once more.

And yet, as she looked up into the sky, so warm and dark, she felt a moment of peace. Maybe this was what her Papa had felt, and why he'd sought out the sky so much. She only wished she could ask him.

A/N: Thanks for reading!