Story time
Dec 31, 2016
here's the first page of the first chapter for this new comic I'll be working on alongside my other comic with my main Oc, I would also really appreciate it if you guys can point some grammatical errors that I'll be making in the future, my english is not the best but I hope it's ok. TTwTT
Bunny
Top comment
Your story seems pretty interesting. I can't wait to see how it will unfold.
As for your grammar, there are a few mistakes but nothing too major. Your English overall is pretty good and we can understand what your trying to convey.
I'm not an English teacher by any means but I am a native English speaker, so I hope you find my corrections helpful.
He did everything he [can]
Correction:
He did everything he [could]
Till his tiny heart [can't] take it anymore
Correction:
Till his tiny heart [couldn't] take it anymore
Watch as the [colors] in his life [drifts] away
Correction:
Watch as the [colors] in his life [drift] away
or
Watch as the [color] in his life [drifts] away
Recommendation for you
-
Recommendation
Hayden's notes
Mystery 178.8k likes
-
Recommendation
Do You Even Witch
BL 4.7m likes
-
Recommendation
The Little Trashmaid
Comedy 794.5k likes
-
Recommendation
Humor me
Slice of life 3.2m likes
-
Recommendation
Autophobia
Romance 990.6k likes
-
Recommendation
Strange and Wild
Fantasy 806.3k likes
-
Feeling lucky
Random series you may like
The Queen and his Servant
87.1k views3.3k subscribers
Akiyama Yashiro was born with a silver spoon in his mouth, born as a rich child his he gets all the things he want, expect for his parents attention, sick and tired of being ignored he started to rebel against his parents getting low grades, skipping class, getting into fights and because of this he was now called the Queen with his Queen like demanding attitude, then a transfer student from Germany arrived will he be able to help melt the Queens lonely cold heart?
Comments (31)
See all