When it comes to my wife and I, I am Parker's clear Number 2. Actually, "Number 2" makes it sound like I'm closer in rank to Kari than I really am, so I should clarify that I'm a very distant Number 2. If Kari isn't in the same room, then Parker and I are bros for life. As soon as she walks back in the room, the little dude is clawing to get out of my arms.

I've grown used to this. I know it's normal, and, to be honest, I'd prefer my wife to me, too. She's way prettier and she smells better. In fact, I actually find it kind of amusing now. Especially when I want Parker to give me a hug.

When I come home from work, Parker is usually standing near the door playing with a ball or something. I'll reach out to him and say, "Let me hold you, Parker!" He'll just look up at me completely nonplussed; no expression on his face whatsoever. Then he'll turn away and focus his attention back on the ball.

If he was a grown man, it'd be the biggest snub I could ever receive. But because he's one-year-old (and also my son), his complete indifference is humorous to me.

I love that kid. Even if he wouldn't pee on me if I were on fire.

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What rank have you achieved with your children? What tips do you have for parents who are wanting to level up?