Sometimes if you haven't walked in someone else shoes or experienced certain things you don't know the deeper story behind why they do the things they do or react certain way to things. For me and my personal option my negative behavior isn't excused nor should situations give me a free pass to act a certain way that is damaging to myself and others.
I struggled with beating myself up mentally and physically for so long. Treating yourself in a harmful way won't fix anything. If you're struggling with that guilt or shame and it's eating you up inside to the point that you feel you have to punish yourself to amend your wrong please don't do that. I've learned through my own mistakes that the best way for me to show that I've changed and have learned that my mistake was wrong or that what I did intentionally was wrong, is to have a changed life. I won't be caught making that same mistake again and will learn how to do things the right way.
I can only speak for me individually and just share my thoughts and feelings through my comic and what I learned and what has helped me so much whenever I was battling with suicide because of the guilt and shame is the fact that I am alive and breathing right here right now and that means something.
If I was so worthless and low down and a shattered deficit that I thought I was then why was I given another day to live, another day to find the joys in life, another day to just breath and see the beauty of nature around me and see that one day my dark days can some how be a beacon of light to someone else.
Because if someone full of mistakes and broken like me can make it through then hopefully this can be of encouragement for someone else to hang in there and make it through too....
Sorry again for my emotional rambling, this story is one of my deeper, raw emotion pieces so I'm sorry if I made anyone uncomfortable with my talking but I do hope this helps.
>/////< I know I already said this in the post but I'm so sorry again for my little emotional blurb, I'm terrible with handling my emotions and get so embarrassed but if this can help someone that is at where I was at then I don't mind a little shyness from my end. I also wanted to let you all know that I've also updated the next 2 pages on my website (http://www.s-morishitastudio.com/rescue-me/) , I believe pages 17-18 are posted there and chapter 8 is posted on Patreon :D
Sandra may be known as an ice burg at her job but at home she is a committed granddaughter who is trying to rescue her verbally abusive grandfather from his toxic behavior but she's struggling to maintain her own sanity. His toxic behavior gets worse when she makes three new friends: her coworker, his father and their little dog Chamski.