"Andie, if for only one minute you wanted to sleep with him, then maybe it wasn't a mistake." "But Pacey." Andie McPhee begged but he continued on slowly and kindly. "Maybe you sleeping with him was just your hearts way of telling you that I'm not the one." Pacey Whiter said looking down even though his heart was wrenching out.

"That's not true." Andie spoke again. "I'm just not the one for you." Pacey continued looking into his ex-girlfriends crying eyes, his first love and stayed firm as she walked away towards the creek of Capeside, Massachusetts.

It was all about timing and truth and heart break. If it was true that Andie slept with the other man on Dawson's Creek because she subconsciously knew that Pacey wasn't her true love, then would it work the other way around. Could you sleep with someone knowing subconsciously that they were the one?

Could your life work in reverse of others. Could you already have done something that changed your life, and then have an interruption enter, to only confuse you and shake things up? But for Charlie she couldn't consider such things because that's not how it worked on the television. An interruption a change, entered before anything drastic took place, so how could the event already happen before the interruption? And how could these things mean the same way if flipped around?

Charlie's cell phone was lying on the ground next to her as tears fell down her eyes silently and the television flashed on the desk. She sniffled and sucked in the tears as she picked up the phone reluctantly. "Hello?" She asked softly hurt in her voice. "Charlie is that you?" Emma Watson asked happily. "Yeah. hi Emma." Charlie grunted as she leaned on the bedroom door handle to pull herself off the ground.

"I just wanted to apologize…for today?" Charlie rolled her eyes as she walked over to her bed and lowered the television volume from her remote. "Huh?" "In the bathroom…I didn't know you were in there." Charlie slightly smiled at the sound of her friend's voice but that quickly faded. "Its okay Emma." There was a pause. "so are you and Kale dating?" she croaked probably digging gossip for the rest of the group, who was wanting it for the rest of the school, who wanted it for the rest of the town.

"Umm, yeah, I guess." Charlie responded softly feeling very odd all of the sudden. "are you okay there Charlie?" "Yeah…" She said slowly. "Look Emma, I'll see you tomorrow." Emma made a small noise and responded: "bye." When Charlie Radin hung up the phone she threw it across her room and it just missed her wall and heavily fell on the ground as she turned back to the television.

She turned the channel hour after hour watching an new show, with new characters and new stories lines, always looking for answers. There weren't any but these shows sent her therapy until her father slammed on her door, just getting home from work, so he was still sober. "Yeah?" Charlie cried walking to the door and slowly opening it. Her father was standing in the door way looking down at her slightly wearing a suit and tie with his arms crossed. "Where's your brother?" He asked angrily. "I don't know." She grunted. "You don't know?" Mr. Radin repeated with a tone in his voice which scared Charlie.

"What's the matter with you?" He asked looking his daughter up and down. "Nothing dad." She replied. "Where's Kevin?" He asked again. "I have no fucking clue!" she called. "I haven't talk to him!" He grimaced at him. "Well you better figure it out." "How am I supposed to know?" She looked around her room, now that he was inside.

"You guys have the same friends." Charlie almost laughed. "Where the hell have you been? We haven't had the same group of friends for a year Dad." He looked at her again and his face fluttered as Charlie heard her mother call: "John! John!"

Mr. Radin walked out into the hallway and looked down at his wife. "yes." He said kindly. "Someone called names Amanda, our son is there." Mr. Radin nodded and looked at his daughter. "Pick him up." He grimaced before walking down the stairs.

Charlie protested as she walked downstairs but her father was giving Mrs. Radin her pills. Charlie slammed the front door shut and drove down to Amanda Hilfiger's house and pulled into the driveway and held her hand on the horn, having it beep incessantly.

Radin walked out from the house, kissing Amanda hardly, then rolled his eyes as he saw his twin sister's car. He got into the car and buckled his seat belt. The car was silent before Charlie had the feeling, the need to annoy him. "So your staying at your girlfriends house." She grumbled. "Well I didn't feel like being chased through my house as well." He said sarcastically.

"I never thought I would have to worry about you getting into my business, never the less tossing it around the whole school." Charlie said quietly. "You knew how hard it was for me, Radin." He smiled. "You don't seem to upset now, walking around parties and school like your earth's god given present. But now everyone knows its just because your fucking your best friend… although no mystery there."

"Radin!" She cried as she drove. "you know what, just because you don't get any, don't take it out on me… your just made because your not invited to those parties and no one even knows who you are except that you're my brother." She laughed slightly. "That's probably why you go by our last name, just to throw it into peoples faces that you actually related to me."

"I see right through you Charlie, you act like you don't mind of who've your become, but I know you don't like being the center of attention and that you have to go to the parties so you can get drunk so you wont remember your life, the only thing I'm iffy on when if comes to you is if you actually love Kale or not, cause sometimes I think you still miss Ian Rowland." By now Charlie was pulling into the Radin's driveway.

"Don't you dare speak about him Radin, you know nothing, NOTHING, about Me." he smirked again. "And I think I have my answer." He added opening his car door. "I mean really if you're not embarrassed by Kale, why does it matter to you who knows you slept with him? Aren't I right…" He trailed off as he walked into the house closing the door angrily behind him.

The sun was setting, Charlie noticed as she looked over the horizon as she stood outside her front door. She closed it behind her once she walked in and went straight up into her room, having no mood for talking to anyone.

The night sky was completely dark she picked up her phone from the corner of her bedroom and dialed Kale's number into it. "Hello." He said softly. "hi Kale." Charlie responded solemnly as she sat on her bed, her back against the wall and her knees pressed to her chest. "Is everything okay" Kale asked from the sound of her voice. "Yeah, yeah I'm fine." She responded trying to chipper her mood, but what her brother had said confused her slightly.

And now she wasn't even sure if she was making this phone call to prove Radin wrong or just because she wanted to, she felt like her mind was jumping through fire burning circles. "What are you doing?" "Just watching television." Charlie replied as she sat on her bed.

"And you dare talk to someone during this time." Kales voice was playful and he could have fooled Charlie for being happy. "I already sat in silence for five hours, hoping to find some answers in the tube Kale…" She said not to disappoint of what he knew of his best friend and or his girlfriend.

"Answers for what?" Kale questioned easing into his playful games for the truth. There was a short silence as Charlie continued talking without answering. "Yeah… so about today" She said but instantly thought of how that topic probably wasn't any better then the last. "Yeah how was it?" He asked in a lighter tone, with a sense of urgency in his voice, feeling the same as Charlie as he sat in his own house on the roof outside his window escaping the inner of his household.

"I thought the morning went quite well, don't you?" Charlie said happily only remembering the good and trying to ignore everything else. "I would say so Chase." She blushed slightly although he could tell from her voice. No one mentioned the afternoon, they both talked like nothing was different.

Charlie's bedroom door pushed open as Kale asked: "…do you think he'll go away?" "Huh?" she asked as she looked at her doorway. "Kale, can you hold on a second." He grunted as she flipped the phone away form her mouth. "What do you want?" She asked looking at her brother who was smirking.

"Dad wants to know if you plan on eating this evening or if you're just going to stay held up inside this cave?" "No." "No what?" He asked still smiling at the phone pressed against his twin's ear. "No, I'm not eating." She said harshly but quickly continued. "And what the hell are you looking at." "You're on the phone?" Radin asked yet, he wasn't questioning her. "What's it to you." He shook his head as she walked slowly out of the room. "Plan on getting a ride to school tomorrow too!" Charlie called angrily as she talked into the phone: "sorry, what were you saying?"

Kale laughed slightly into the phone and replied: "never mind." "Okay." Charlie said softly. "Do you want me to bring you to school tomorrow?" Kale asked a bit later. "Your cars broken dumbass." Charlie replied sarcastically. "My dad fixed it." Charlie nodded as she looked at a commercial on the television for various season finales. "Yeah sure…" Her voice trailed off and her throat nearly gasped.

"Next Tuesday: after seven years it's time to say goodbye: the Gilmore girl's series finale." Something in Charlie Radin sunk. She watched Gilmore girls for seven years faithfully, and then reruns everyday at five o'clock. She owns parafinalia in her closer (though she never wore them) and owned every DVD set. Gilmore Girls won above other shows. This was the last thing Charlie needed on top of everything else.

"What's the matter?" Kale asked quickly. "Gilmore girls….is over." She said with a tear in her eye because after all she loved her characters. She followed them on every move and she learned from them, searched through their fictional life's for her own purpose. This wasn't fair. Because you must remember:

Charlie was a mystery to everyone. She would like to compare her self to several people. Several morphed into one. If you asked Charlie Radin how to explain herself she would compare her sarcasm and expressive eyes to those traits of Joey Potter of Capeside Massachusetts, her love for food and fast pace talking from those of the residential Gilmore Girls in Connecticut. Charlie would express her blonde hair and sexy manipulative ways, to Maxie Jones, resident slut in Port Charles. But she would also compare her elusiveness and secretness, and sex appeal to a newly found character called Greta found on Palms Springs beneath the hidden palms.

And if you haven't caught on, all these people in which she would compare herself to, are all fictional. Fake. Unreal. Un-realistic. Yet these are the people and places that sat on the tip of her tongue. And this wasn't because she aspired to be these characters it was because she loved them, in the most profound way.

When Charlie Radin watched television she wasn't talking on the phone, typing on the computer or even doing homework while looking at the screen, watching television was an impressive event for her. When Charlie watched a show, she stepped into the screen, and when your watch a show over and over in sidinication and new episodes for years, you come to know the characters and the people surrounding them and become attached. Like those who you know in real life. Well while Charlie was ignoring her own life and walking for an hour in her characters shoes, she became them, except she always was them.

Maybe in life everything that happened to you wasn't right or felt very good, but maybe they were needed just as much as those things that nice and loving. Like the start of a show was inspiring and meaningful because you knew it could only continue. But like a series finale, its over, only thing left is to imagine how things would go on and remember all those good times.

So now Charlie said loosing her sanity in a sort. Her best friend just became her boyfriend. Her twin brother her worst enemy. Her past was back and on top of it all her most loving and meaningful show in her heart was going off the air. Maybe that sounds stupid or over dramatic but for Charlie it was like loosing her best friend on top being on a roller coaster that just wont stop.